#between this and the woman who felt the need to tell me that the dog i was walking (another one of our pitbulls) was

[last-braincell-standing]

ykw idc anymore i need to rant

we got a return dog at the shelter today. Its upsetting, but not as uncommon as people would hope/think. but this one in particular irked me. see, a few months ago we had a puppy in our care, Randall. Randall was 4 months old, wiggly, happy, loved to give chin kisses (the only part he could reach, even when you were sitting down) and was your classic exuberant puppy. Note that Randall, like many of our dogs, and almost all of our puppies, is a pitbull mix. Today, i saw Randall back in our kennels. I didn't even recognize him at first. He was skin and bones, with freshly docked ears and tail, standing at the door with his head hanging as he gave me sad puppy eyes. It wasn't until I saw him outside, where he greeted me with that familiar "everyone-is-my-friend" wiggles as another volunteer called his name that I made the connection.

They made Randall, who has never met a person he didnt love, into a "scary" dog. I'm not going to argue with people on cropping/docking but this made me livid. This dog in no way needed a cosmetic surgery. And best be sure that's what it was. There was no excuse of "ear infections" (he was a healthy puppy, and they didnt even have him long enough to develop such a problem) or "happy tail" (We have a dog with happy tail! and Randall never needed what she does!) Just the idea that these people made him undergo a surgery that he didnt even NEED as a 5 month old puppy all just to what? make them feel tougher? subscribe to a look? That you made an animal, who relies on you for pretty much everything, to recover from a procedure they didnt need for your own ego - and ON TOP OF THAT TO GET RID OF THE DOG NOT EVEN 2 MONTHS LATER - is sickening.

Because of one person's selfish actions Randall will face more stereotyping and more hurdles that were already hard enough to face just for being a bully mix. It will be harder for him to be adopted, and he, and any future adopter, will face stigma for how he looks, no matter how friendly or well behaved he may be. Pitbulls already don't get a fraction the grace given to other breeds, even the other "scary" ones like the Rottweiler or the Doberman, and it makes me so heartbroken that someone looked at a dog like Randall, and saw nothing more than a potential status symbol.

[werewolfbneimitzvah]

vent post. There are two stories i was told in my teenage years that even before i had a real concept of trans issues made me uninterested in discussing the supposed sacredness and safety of separated sex-based spaces.

First, when i was like 13 or 14 my PE teacher told us about a time she went to a women's public restroom, some guy was hanging out outside the bathrooms, she didn't think anything of it, went to the bathroom, and he walked in after her and like, creeped on her over the top of the stall. She was ok, she wasn't telling us this to scare us, just telling us what to do in situations like that (and iirc she was telling the whole co-ed class this, not just girls, bc it's useful for everyone), but this taught me immediately and forever that there's nothing actually keeping these spaces separate really, that anyone can be a creep in any space, and that establishing a space like that as for women only isn't actually particularly useful for safety.

Second, when i was 16 i was at an anime convention, a friendly acquaintance of mine and i ended up in conversation outside, and he showed me his bare wrist and told me he'd been kicked out. A female friend of his had stepped in dog poop outside, and between that and the stress of the convention she'd had a bit of an emotional breakdown, so being her friend, he started comforting her and ushered her into the women's restroom so they could wash the poop off her shoe together. And because he was a man who went into the women's bathroom, he got kicked out, no matter that he was doing something that was actually beneficial to a woman. Punishing a woman's friend for supporting her was supposed to... protect her somehow? This made it clear to me that a no-exceptions rule separating the sexes like that wasn't actually inherently good for everyone.

And this isn't even getting into me as a child needing to accompany my younger sister to the restroom when we were out with just my dad because she had certain support needs past the age he felt comfortable bringing her into the men's room with him. And what if I'd been born a boy, or she'd been the first born? Who's helping her then?

And of course even putting all this aside, we should always prioritize compassion and support anyway. But i never even needed to meet a trans person to know that "keeping men out of women's bathrooms" is silly nonsense. But trans people also need to pee anyway and as humans they have that right, so leave them the fuck alone. your precious women's restroom is just a fucking room with a door, holy shit give it a fucking rest, if someone is attacking you in the bathroom that's bad and if someone is in there to pee that's good and it doesn't fucking matter what their junk is or was when they were born.

a woman could have done the exact same thing to my PE teacher and it would have also been bad no matter how "supposed" to be in the restroom she was, and no one should ever be punished for helping a crying friend wash their shoe.

Anyway i know I'm speaking to like-minded folks here, i just think about those two stories literally every time bathroom gender shit comes up and it pisses me off.

[sinner-as-saint]

no masters or kings

Priest!Bucky x Reader 

Run-through: Father Barnes’ life had been rather peaceful for years. He never complained though, he chose this. Between mass on Sundays, bible study sessions during the week, and office hours, the amount of time he has left he dedicated to reading and keeping his body active. There wasn’t much to do in this small, almost forgotten town. Then a new face appeared. A woman, married to some businessman who leaves her all by herself while he grows his fortune in the city. Father Barnes seemed determined at first, to herd and care for the new, young, lonely little lamb. But that is until he found himself tempted to sin like never before. 

Themes: priest!bucky, smut, degrading kink, infidelity, explicit language, (sacrilege, blasphemy, and all the other bad stuff)

a/n: i’m going hell anyway so yeah, PILFS <3 

“It’s very late.” 

His hushed voice echoed in the empty, dark church. Your back stiffened as you froze, standing by the pews. You turned around slowly and found him standing at the entrance, the rain falling noisily behind him. As if creating a curtain to separate you two from the world outside. 

You knew where the switches were but you didn’t turn on the light when you walked in. There was just enough light coming from the outside to allow you to move properly and see. So you couldn’t exactly see the expression on his face. 

But you saw that he was drenched, completely. He must’ve gone on a run, you figured, and instead of going back home for the night, he saw the little light at the church doorstep and decided to come check who was here. 

“I… I couldn’t sleep.” You whispered back, watching him as he stepped inside and shook his head – reminding you a little of a dog shaking – as he tried to get the rain water out of his hair. “You once said you always left the church unlocked so I thought…,” You sighed, “I should probably go.” 

“No.” He was quick to say, in that tone. Your body tensed up. “Stay.” He added quietly. 

You looked at him. Drenched jacket, wet track pants sticking to his body, he was breathing heavily so he must’ve ran all the way here. He did that often, he once said. He liked running at night. 

You watched as he stepped closer to where you stood. That little bit of grey in his beard drove you insane. Suddenly you couldn’t think. 

He had that look about him which you could only describe as ‘priestly’. Wise, slightly older, calm. He was the kind of man you’d want to open up to. You’d want him to see all that was dark and wrong inside your human heart only so he could use that firm, strong voice and tell you that it’s all gonna be okay. That you were forgiven. Loved. And never alone. 

You watched as he unzipped his jacket, revealing that ridiculously tight black shirt inside which clung to his ridiculously muscular torso. 

“Did you need me?” He asked, again in that voice. That comforting voice that made everything okay. 

You knew what he meant. How he meant it. You knew he meant it in an innocuous way. But fuck if your mind didn’t go straight to that sinful pit it stays in. Temptation, like a vicious vine, reached and wrapped around your brain as you struggled to speak. 

It was always like this. Ever since the first time you stepped foot in this space and found Father Barnes sitting in silence all by himself. At first you mistook him for being just a parishioner. Black slacks, black shirt with the sleeves rolled up till his elbows, only when he turned around to face you did you notice the white collar. But by then it was too late and in your head you’d already imagined his naked body taking yours, owning you, using you. 

That day, you could tell he could almost read your mind. You were embarrassed so you excused yourself and left quickly. And anytime you wanted to be back here, and be good and behave, one look at Father Barnes and you felt like you were burning with all that pent up desire. 

It wasn’t entirely your fault. When you married your husband, you knew what you were getting into. You knew you married a man who was already married to his job in the city. But your parents couldn’t let such a wealthy, beneficial, and strong alliance go. You were given a luxurious life. There was nothing you lacked. 

You had a lavish home here in this small town, a wedding gift from your busy husband who visited maybe twice a year. You had it all. Money, vintage cars, horses you loved, a home you liked taking care of, privacy, all of it. 

All except company. Intimacy. Feeling a warm body press up against yours at night. Feeling warm skin against yours in the early hours of a lazy morning. You never got to hold hands with anyone, or get a hug. Or share a meal with. Or go on walks with. You were all alone here. And maybe that loneliness pushed you to visit the church the first time. 

Ever since, Father Barnes had become a habit. Watching him, picturing him doing unholy things to you, noticing him whenever you were at a coffee shop, or the library. You yearned for him. And it was all only heightened by the fact that he was so unreachable. So kind. So unlike how you wanted him to be. To him, you were just another lost soul he wanted to guide. 

Did you need me? 

Yes. Yes you did. In the most dirtiest of ways one can imagine. He was a handsome man. Kind blue eyes, long black hair that nearly reached his shoulders, a face only God could’ve created, and that body that he liked to take care of. He was a dream. 

And a priest. 

“I…” You struggled to find your words. “I thought a walk would help tire me out and put me to sleep. But then it started raining so here I am.” You gave him a faint smile. 

He returned one back. 

He ran his fingers through his wet, long hair and said, “I can keep you company for a while, if you want.” 

He waited. Then you said, “I’d like that.” 

–

Bucky was praying in his head as he asked you to take a seat, then sat down beside you. 

He prayed to God, in fact to anyone and anything that would listen to him. God, gods, universe, the freaking stars in the night sky which weren’t visible right now because it was pouring like it was the end of the world. He prayed you wouldn’t glimpse down and see the thing growing in his pants. 

He was ashamed. 

Ever since he first saw you, there was this pull he’d never felt before. It was like having burning hot claws sink into his flesh each time he laid eyes on you. Out on the streets, in the coffee shops, in the library, in the little diners, at the freaking grocery store, in parking lots – it was a small town so he saw you a lot. 

He had to walk by your extravagant property each time he went to the bakery, and each time he felt like a little boy who was excited to see whether or not the pretty girl would be outside this time to smile and give him a little wave. 

Then each time he saw you in this church it was somehow way worse. Like being here made the temptation more sinful. 

Bucky looked up at the cross and mentally begged. Make it stop. This is wrong. Make it stop. 

“You know you don’t have to do this.” Your gentle voice spoke. “I’m sure you need your sleep.” 

“It would be wrong of me to leave you here all by yourself.” He said, realising that this was the longest conversation you two had had. Usually you were too shy to even look him in the eyes. You kept your sentences short and always looked caught. 

So he liked this. 

Silence. 

Then you said, “I was never religious, you know?” There was a faint smile in that tone, he didn’t have to look to know. 

“Are you now?” 

He could feel your shrug. “I don’t know.” You answered. “I don’t think I have what it takes to be… so desperately good. Like you, for instance.” 

Oh if only you knew… 

Bucky shifted in his seat. Mentally begged God some more as the quiet tone of your voice made it hard for him to even sit still. He wanted to let out some of the primal aggression he was feeling. Squeeze something. Bite something. Sink into something. Preferably your tight hot body. 

Heavens. He sighed. Help me. 

Clearing his throat he said, “You don’t have to be if you don’t want to. It’s enough for me that you feel comfortable enough just to come here and feel like you’re not alone.” 

A moment of silence passed, with just the sound of heavy rain in the background. “But it’s not enough for me.” Then you quickly added, as if embarrassed that you must have overshared, “I shouldn’t be saying these things.” 

“Why not?” He frowned. What things? 

You let out a soft chuckle that only sent more blood down to his rock hard cock. Bucky clenched his fists, struggling. 

“It’s the middle of the night. I should go.” You said. 

No. He didn’t want you to go. “If there are things you need to voice out,” He said, “Would the booth make you feel more comfortable?” 

You chuckled again, turning your head to look at him. Bucky let his eyes roam all over you very, very quickly. Dark trousers, dark jacket, a scarf around your neck… too many layers. He almost groaned as he imagined himself peeling all those layers off of you. 

“Oh Father Barnes,” You sighed. “Maybe another time.” 

Then you left. Leaving him confused, aroused, and feeling way too much. 

— 

The next time Bucky saw you was yet again, on a random rainy night. After his daily run, he noticed the small lamp outside the church door was lit and ran all the way to the church to check out who it was. 

He ignored the boyish hope in his heart which begged that it’d be you. Yet he breathed out in relief when he saw it truly was you. 

“Can’t sleep?” He asked, hoping his tone wasn’t too teasing. 

You gave him a small smile and nodded. “Would you… um, last time you mentioned the booth. Do you think, I mean, I know it’s late and–,” 

He cut you off by walking over and placing his hands on your shoulders. “Whatever makes you feel more comfortable. Follow me.” 

You did. 

–

Sitting down on the wooden bench felt weird. You’d never done it before. Never been inside the wooden box. The space was small, dark wooden panels on all sides. A small opening allowed you to partially see Father Barnes on the other side, that is if it was during the daytime. Right now, it was all too dark. You only knew he was there by the sound of movement. 

The air smelled like candle wax and incense. It felt mysterious, intimate almost to be here with him. It felt weirdly comforting. Maybe this is why people come back, you thought. 

“You’ve never done this, have you?” He asked. 

“No.” You replied, feeling a little out of place. 

“Well, we begin with the sign of the cross…” He trailed off, as if hoping you’d do it along with him. You did. Then silence. “Now, you may tell me about the things you left without saying last time.” 

You took a deep breath. Then said, “I think I’ve been alone for way too long.” 

There was a pause before he spoke. “Alone? You mean in this town?” 

You exhaled calmly and explained, “I mean in my marriage.” 

–

Bucky closed his eyes and sighed. Alone in your marriage? God help him. This was not helping his sick, twisted fantasies. All those times he fantasised as he walked by your expensive home about how he could just walk in and find where you are and demand you let him take you. Your husband wouldn’t be home. He never was, everyone knew that. Most people pitied you, the rest envied your lifestyle. But he… oh it was his most sinful fantasy till date. 

He forced himself to ask, even though he was in no shape to hear the answer, “What is it that makes you feel this way? Is there a lack of some kind?” 

He heard your shaky breath, as if you were debating whether you should tell him. “I…” You started, then stopped. Then sighed and finally said, “I’ve never been with my husband.” You explained further. “We both agreed that our marriage was only a way to solidify the business transactions between our families. We both agreed we wouldn’t be a conventional couple. He craved his busy work like in the city and I liked the tranquillity of a small town.” You paused. 

Bucky listened intently. 

“So I knew what I was getting into when I got married and moved here, while my husband remained in the city. We only see each other maybe for two weekends out of the year and that too only during the holidays when we need to put on a show for our families and smile and look happy in family photos. And I was fine with it.” Another defeated sigh. “But then it got lonely.” 

Bucky sucked in a breath as he shook his head slightly, begging God again. Don’t let my mind go there. Don’t let the fantasies seem attainable. Please. He begged. But he also needed to say something back. Something priestly. And quick. 

“I see.” He cleared his throat, refusing to even acknowledge the growing desire in his pants. Yet again. “So it’s the distance. How long has this been the case?” 

You replied, “Since the very start. I’ve never been with him, you see?” 

No. No. No. 

“Never lived with him? Never felt a sense of companionship? I admit, that must be very hard. To feel alone in a marriage–,” 

“Father Barnes,” It sounded like you were begging in shame as you interrupted him. “I have never had sex with him. Or anyone. Ever since I got married two years ago. Do you understand now?” 

“Oh.” 

You let out a soft chuckle. “Oh? I guess it must come naturally to you. To dodge those, um, desires but, I’m only human. I’m a woman, with needs. I… it worries me sometimes because often it is all I can think about all day.” Another humourless laugh. “I don’t have much to do, you see? I do enjoy the simplicity of the small town. I love my animals, my staff, I get to do things I’ve always wanted to do. I can drive around and read, and paint, and cook, and I truly do enjoy my company but sometimes… It can be very lonely. One time I–,” 

You cut yourself off. And silence followed. Tormenting Bucky even more as you left him wondering. And oh did he wonder. About your lonely nights. About you in your luxurious home, in your large bed, fingers sliding in and out from in between your thighs, crying out loud as you make yourself come. Poor you. Rich, lonely wife of a careless, rich man. Forced to take care of your needs all by yourself. 

If only there was an equally lonely man able to keep you company. If only… 

“What?” He asked, because he needed to know. “One time you what?” 

“I… you know there are people who provide services. For women like me.” Your breathy voice was driving him to the fucking edge. 

“Women like you?” 

“Yes.” Your voice was more firm now, almost like you were smiling in a mischievous way. “You know? Rich, lonely women. I almost, I mean for the longest time I contemplated hiring a male escort. But then I didn’t.” 

“I see.” He said again. “Feeling alone and neglected can result in wanting companionship in whatever form is available.” 

He was barely holding on to fucking sanity now. 

“But it was wrong, wasn’t it? To want to be with another man, any man at this point to be honest.” You sighed. “It’s like an itch that never goes away. And it makes me…” You paused, then said, “It makes me want things, crave things, crave people that I shouldn’t. It’s getting worse and worse,” You confessed. “Sometimes I leave the doors and windows unlocked or opened, even at night,” You sighed, struggling too by the sound of it, “Shamelessly hoping someone might just walk in and–,”

“Stop.” He said, using a voice he never did before. He had never interrupted a penitent so rudely. So suddenly. But he heard his own twisted fantasy come out of your mouth in that breathy tone he would lose it. “Please,” He begged in a lowered voice. 

Then he heard your gasp. Like you were ashamed. Alone in that wooden box, drowning in your desires and temptation. Right there, in this dark night, right fucking there for him to take. To taste. To touch. He was no one but a starved male at that point. He was nothing but the desires in his head. The fantasy. The claws of sin dug into him, reaching places he thought he’d shut off forever but there they were, open and raw and wanting. Wanting you. 

He didn’t know when he got out of his side of the booth and opened the other side to find you with a surprised look on your face. Surprised, but with lust in your eyes. 

“Father Barnes?” 

Bucky was crossing that line he shouldn’t. He knew he was. There was no going back. Not as he knelt down right in front of you. The space was cramped but he didn’t care. He knelt in between your legs and looked up at you. 

“You said you craved people you shouldn’t. Is one of them me?” He asked. 

–

The tension was too much. The air around you shifted. You looked down at him, not regretting the dress you wore because now you could feel him in between your bare legs. Even in the dark his body tormented you. He was still cold and drenched from the rain earlier. But so firm with your thighs pressing around him. 

“Yes.” You answered, truthfully. 

His warm hands were on your bare thighs immediately. Rubbing up and down like he had all the time in the world. “Is that so?” He questioned. His tone was lower, darker. Grave. Fuck. “Is that why you wore a pretty dress to come see me? In the middle of the night?” 

He leaned in, lips brushing against your collarbones and neck as he breathed. His warm breath making you squirm and shiver. You bit back a moan as he slowly slid his hands under your dress. 

He looked down at his hands disappearing beneath your dress for a quick moment before he looked back up into your eyes in disbelief. 

“Did you wear this for me?” He asked upon further inspecting your body, as his fingers brushed against the softest, thinnest of lace underwear. “Surely you didn’t wear this for your husband who never comes home to you, hmm? Answer me.” 

“No.” You answered firmly. “I didn’t wear it for him.” Of course you didn’t. Your husband treated you like you were non-existent. Not that you minded. 

Bucky chuckled, his mouth still exploring your skin. His stubble rough against your soft skin. “And what did you think was gonna happen here? Showing up dressed like a shameless woman. Did you hope you could tempt me into touching you?” He whispered. 

His fingers slowly slid past your underwear, exploring the warmth there. You let out a soft moan, your own fingers sliding into his hair as he groaned upon feeling how wet you were. 

One moment he had a little bit of sanity left where he kept telling himself that he could stop at any moment if he wanted to. But then he slid his finger inside you, and the soft moan you let out was his undoing. 

He couldn’t hold back anymore, he leaned in to kiss you. Hard and fast, before his mouth found its way down your neck again, until he wrapped his mouth around your clothed nipple and sucked. Hard. 

You couldn’t help but gasp and moan as his warm mouth wrapped around your flesh, wetting the fabric of your dress. Then he shifted to the other one, making you whine and squirm against him. Your fingers slid into his hair, tugging gently as he toyed with your breasts. 

And then he was eagerly bunching up your dress so he could taste what he wanted the most, that wetness in between your legs. “Good women don’t do this, you know?” He whispered, “What if someone comes in here right now and decides they need some peaceful alone time? What then?” 

You whined as he lowered your underwear, throwing it aside carelessly. You knew nobody would come in here right now. It was the middle of the night again. This whole small town was asleep. Not even one car drove on the road. But you still played into the fantasy because it was so hot. You were burning, feeling the touch of a man after so long. 

“They’d catch us.” You said, “They’d catch you.” You groaned, doing absolutely nothing to stop him. 

Bucky chuckled, “Or maybe they’d see you spreading your legs like a desperate whore for me and decide they want to watch the show. Maybe they’d even grab a chair and sit, and watch as I make you feel good.” You whined upon hearing his words. He couldn’t help the smirk. “You like that? Hmm? The possibility of someone finding you in here, legs spreading and your arousal dripping out of you? Does that make you feel powerful? Wanted?” 

“Please…” You begged, quietly. 

Then he gave you what you wanted. And you let him. You let him taste you until he had his fill. You let him take one of your legs and put it over his shoulder which opened you up even more to his warm, eager mouth. To his tongue which slid in and out and up and down until you were almost crying in pleasure. 

“Look at you,” He said, kissing down your inner thigh. “Spreading your legs for a man of God like a shameless little slut, hmm? Is that what you are?” 

He ate you out until you were trembling, until your arousal was dripping down his chin. “Fuck, please!” You cried out, fingers tugging on his hair. His tongue, his lips, the gentle suction of his warm mouth –  it was all too much. 

“Is this what you wanted? All those times you left your doors and windows unlocked, did you ever wish I would wander in and just take you however I wanted?” He moved his head side to side, his coarse stubble brushing against your soft inner thighs. “Hmm? Did you ever think about me while touching yourself, you filthy little whore?” 

“Yes…” You whined and trembled, trying to keep your voice down as he made you lose your mind by eating you out like a starved man. 

Which he was. It was like he was tasting the most forbidden of fruits after years of being denied. Like he was suddenly unchained and free. Hungry. 

You whined as he pulled away without letting you come. You wondered if he regretted this, if he would kick you out but he only pulled you off the bench, flipped the two of you around in the dark so that he was the one sitting on the bench now and pulled you onto his lap. 

You were surprised for only a moment, but then got over it as you found your impatient hands at the waistband of his track pants. You paused, for only a moment, fingers toying with the waistband of his underwear, you looked up into his eyes, they shone even in the near complete dark. Like he was… godly. 

“Are you sure you want–,” 

He cut you off, firmly. Using that tone again. “I will die right here if I don’t take you right now, you hear me?” 

You nodded, reaching for his cock as you said in a shaky voice, “I’ve wanted you for so long.” 

“Did you?” His voice was suddenly deeper than earlier. 

You nodded, wondering if he even saw it in the dark. But you didn’t care, not as you wrapped your hand around his hard cock, hearing him hiss in pleasure as you lifted off of his lap, aligned the tip of his cock to your entrance before gently sinking down on him. 

“Oh fuck,” You cried out as you slid down his thick cock, his stare burning on your face as he thrust up into you, all the way in. 

“Fuck,” He swore, then leaned in to give you a wet, messy kiss as he thrust his hips up. He hadn’t done this in a long, long time but nature took over. He wanted more, more, more. “This is all you wanted, huh? Always giving me those eyes, always giving me that look,” He sounded stern. Almost mad. “You were basically always around me like a bitch in heat, hmm? Is this cock all you were craving? While living in your nice big house, your husband away earning money for you to spend, all this time you’ve been thinking about me, hmm?” 

“Yes…” You whined as he grabbed your hips and guided you up and down his cock, stretching you out in the process. You held onto his shoulders as you rode his cock, bouncing on it while you moaned for him, bending a little so as to not hit the roof of the booth. 

“Yes what?” He asked, sounding all cocky and less priestly as he smacked your thigh. 

“Father Barnes,” You corrected yourself, “You’re all I wanted. You’re all I think about.” You felt him fill you up nicely each time, the pressure in between your legs getting hotter and hotter. He was better than you could’ve ever imagined. Bigger, even. 

“You don’t even care how wrong this is, do you?” He threw his head back, grunting at how good you felt. “You don’t even care what you’re doing to a pious man like myself.” He let out a strained moan, as he thrust into you over and over again, while also bringing you down on his cock each time with enough force to make your tits bounce. “I thought about you too, you know? About this tight little cunt, dripping and hungry for me. Some nights I would’ve done anything for just a taste of you.” 

His words were too much. The whole situation was too much. Too good. The space felt hot, stuffy, and sinful. “Please, I need to come. Please.” You said, unable to hold back your moans when he placed his thumb over your clit and rubbed it gently, in sync with his thrusts. It only made you clench harder around him. 

You bit your lip to hold back your moans as he thrust his hips up more into you, your eyes rolled back and you moaned out loud as you came so close to coming undone for him. 

“You’re gonna come for me, little lamb?” He asked, “You’re gonna come all over my cock like a shameless woman, huh? Not caring about where we are, what time it is, or what your husband might think if he ever finds out, you don’t care, do you?” He chuckled. “You’re too cock-drunk to care, too much of a little slut for me to care, huh?” 

You answered after a loud whimper, “Yes… please.” 

He cupped your cheek and traced your mouth with his thumb, “Go on. Come all over my cock. Come for me…” 

Your walls clenched violently around his cock. You came hard, whimpering and crying for him and gasping for breath. 

Bucky came right after you, feeling his whole body tingle like this was the closest to heaven he’ll ever get. His warm load spilling inside you as he wrapped his arms around you and held you like you were the most fragile thing in the world. Like he hadn’t just rammed his cock in and out of you like an animal. Like he hadn’t just sinned in so many ways. 

You caught your breath, wrapped in his strong arms. Your head rested on his shoulder as you tried to calm your racing heart. You could feel his cock twitch inside you, his cum flowing out of you. 

“You’re not gonna hire any stranger to come and keep you company, you hear me?” 

You nodded, face brushing against his damp shirt and his warm neck. It felt good here, in his embrace. It felt safe. 

“I’m here, and you’re mine to take care of now. When you need to be fucked, you come find me. Is that understood?” 

You smirked, then said, “Yes, Father Barnes.” 

---

part 2

[georgiapeach30513]

Your Mark on Me, Part 14

Summary: Steve should have paid attention

Pairings: Steve Rogers X Reader

Rating: explicit

Warnings:  explicit language, explicit sexual content, teasing, unprotected sex, PIV sex, hard sex, mirrors, creampie, threats, I'm sorry for the pain I have caused, 18+ ONLY

Word Count: 5K

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*dividers created by @firefly-graphics

Steve gives you a warm smile, watching you as you bashfully eat your food. His eyes follow every movement your hand makes before you drop your fork and try to give him an angry look, “Doesn’t look right on you, Dovey.”

“Stop watching me. You eat,” it’s unnerving how he watches you. Like he needs to memorize everything about your movements. Every moan that whispers off your lips as you eat, every happy dance you do, and even the way your eyebrows reflect how your feeling with each bite. He is obsessed with your very being.

“I already have,” he lowers his eyes, motioning towards your fork before you slowly put another bite in your mouth. Dragging out the utensil at a snail speed. Sucking on the metal hard before it pops out of your mouth, “It would be better for you and that soaking wet cunt between your legs if you didn’t do that. That’s your only warning.”

Oh, you love a warning and what happens when you don’t listen, “Don’t threaten me with a good time,” you tease. Hoping that it amps him up even more.

“Ha,” his voice bellows up into the cabin and you drop your fork. Crossing your arms over your chest as you glare at him. You weren’t the same girl he met a year ago. You were a woman that could fully take and survive Steve Rogers. “Aren’t you just the prettiest little bratty slut. You really want to see exactly how I can punish you for your behavior?”

“I’ve been spanked before,” you remind him with an edge of defiance. Shimmying your shoulders a bit as you start to smirk at him. You have been able to take everything he’s shoved your way. “I wear my badge of Steve’s Dove proudly. Been marked and forbidden for anyone to touch. Would you have claimed me if I couldn’t put up with your menacing ways?”

“I’m a menace now, am I? Tell me, Dovey, who am I a menace for?”

“You’re a menace Steve Rogers, but not to me. All I see is a fool completely in love with me. And my pussy,” you emphasize ‘my’ before you launch out of your seat, and start to run through the cabin. “So in love with me that you will chase your girlfriend around this cabin laughing.”

Steve would never say the words, but he won’t stop you from feeling his emotions. You did make him a fool for you. He would never have been caught chasing you around with the brightest smile on his face. He didn’t even want to catch up to you just yet. He hadn’t felt this way in years. Like everything was just right in the world. In his world. And all he wants is to laugh and have fun with you.

“Oh, Stevie boy,” you smile, spinning around to look at him before you pull apart his button up. Giving your shoulders a shake so he can see your tits bouncing around, and he stops just to gaze upon you. “Not tempted?”

He shakes his head no, but he can’t ignore the shuffle he does with his pants. He is such a horn dog! “What about now?” Cocking up one of your eyebrows you cup your breasts. Keeping your eyes on his, as you start to pinch and tweak your nipples, “Now?”

“Not quite,” liar. You start to undo every button slowly before letting it fall into the floor, and he hisses through his teeth. His eyes drape over every inch of your skin. His gray sweatpants start to tent, and he still wants you to believe he’s not turned on.

“Really? You want to keep chasing me through the house?”

“I’d rather see you try and crack me. That’s what you’re poorly attempting to do, hmm?” He can try to deny it, but even the way Steve speaks is different. Gone was the harsh language. He still had a filthy mouth when he was inside of you, but now he is creating a different Steve. One just for you.

He glances hungrily over your naked body before walking over to the couch. Sitting down smoothly, and even acknowledges his aching cock by rubbing over his swollen pants. Smirking at you while you want to gawk. “You’re craving me, huh, Dovey? You want that sloppy cunt to be hugging this?” Those meaty fingers grip over his covered girth, and you let out a sound that is more animalistic than human.

“Make me lose control. Make me want to show you my cock that is yours for the taking. What is my little cock slut going to do?” You take a step towards him. Trying to be sexy as you saunter closer, but he holds up a finger, “Eh eh eh. Earn your seat on this throne.”

“How?” There’s only a flicker of a moment of Steve going soft. But that twinkle of an eye is gone and replaced with an evil sneer. “Captain?”

“Use your imagination. What do you think I want more of in the world,” how are you supposed to think when your pussy is throbbing. A low hum sounds through your brain and pulses through your entire body. There is only one thing on your mind, and that is you want him to fuck you. You don’t want anything sweet. You want to be destroyed. Since he’s going to be out all day. You wanted to feel him when he left.

Taking a deep breath, you softly close your eyes. Trying to recall a moment that you were the most vulnerable to Steve? When did he feel his own need to destroy you? To own you?

Like a movie playing in your mind, you open your eyes with a grin. If you were going to be destroyed, so was he. You take a deep breath and pretend the trauma that night didn’t happen. Thinking back to when that night was sexy. To the moments of Steve struggling to look at you or your reflection. He couldn’t even figure out what the best view for him was.

Nakedly walking over to the wall, you look at him through that mirror. Biting on your lip as you lean forward. Spreading your legs and sticking out your ass, so he gets a glimpse of your weeping cunt. Feeling more empowered as he adjusts himself. His chest rumbles out a low growl, and you grab both sides of the mirror.

Leaning over it low and slow as you lay it on the floor, and you look at him over your shoulder before straddling the mirror. Shimmying your hips from side to side, and his eyes move to the reflection to stare at your spread pussy. “Do you remember, Captain? You made me watch you fuck me with your gun? Had me coming all over it while I stared at my body taking every bit of what you were giving me?”

“Dove,” he warns as you start to kneel down. Getting down on all fours before you lean forward, and his Adam’s apple bobs with just how uncomfortably hard he is. His cock out of his pants, and he fists it slowly. Beads of precum leak onto the crown of his cock and you whimper. You can already feel him pushing into you.

You are ready to drool with the way he strokes his cock. Knuckles so tense trying to replicate the feeling of your tight walls. Wagging your ass before your hand goes in between your legs, and you gently run your hand through your velvety folds. Your moans match Steve’s, and you dip even lower, using your fingers to spread yourself out, and Steve’s grip gets even tighter.

“I know what would feel better, Captain,” you coo, moving your fingers to push into your warmth. Mewling as you watch him fight the pleasure that is right here. The stairway to heaven is steps away from him, and he was denying himself the greatest high he could ever imagine. “I’ve got a surprise for you.”

“And what’s that?” His eyes are black pools of lust. Mouth hanging open as he watches you fuck yourself. Pulling out your fingers you spread them apart, and he gulps as strings of your arousal stick to the appendages, creating a beautiful webbing of your honey. “You’re soaked.”

“Soaked and ready to be fucked. Filled up with your cum. And I get to watch all of it. Watch how my body morphs to accommodate that big fat cock of yours. Have you ever had a pussy as tight as mine?” He shakes his head no, and you adjust yourself to have your front flat on the mirror. Face on the cold glass as you look back at him. Wiggling your ass and watch him sweat.

“It’s all yours, Captain. Whatever you want. And you know you want it. Want to fuck me so deep and hard that I feel you in my throat. Feel you for the rest of the day, and feel empty because you're not inside of me. Like what you see?”

He stands up, and lets his sweatpants drop down to the floor. His cock is angry and red as he walks over to you. Sinking to his knees, but still he stares at your needy cunt. Inspecting your hole before he spits down on your puckered hole. His warm saliva drifts down your seam before it, and possibly your slick, puddles on the mirror below you. Thick, wet, and sticky. Just the way Steve loved it.

You whine. Pushing your ass into him. Desperate and needing his touch like you need the air to survive. Rocking your body into him with so much desire that you could almost come undone like this. “Please, fuck me. Own me. Destroy me. Kill any desire for another man’s touch.”

“There will be no other man,” he grunts, railing his veiny cock into you so hard, and so deep you see stars. Nails scratching on the carpet as he impales you. Giving you no time to adjust, just raw and dirty fucking, and you go outside of your mind. The pleasured pain surges all the way to the tips of your hair.

Unadulterated euphoria that you have never felt before. This is fucking. A careless need to get off like the animals you were underneath all that humanity. Pulling out the most salacious sounds out of your mouth, and you’re a mess. He is implanting himself into the blood that courses through your veins with every hard thrust into you. Exploring parts of your body that you are sure he has never discovered.

His fingers dig into your hips with such force, but all you feel is fulfilled. He could use you. He could have you. Every last bit of you, and you would still beg for more. Searing himself into your body more than the tattoo could ever do. Choking out your sounds of ecstasy, and he goes harder. Deeper.

His eyes go between where the two of you connect and the reflection. Watching himself burrow into your body like some predator. Leaving behind a trail where his cock is rooted in your body. The vulgarity of seeing your body take him fully like that makes his balls tighten up against his body, and he spanks your ass to help him focus on going harder. Faster.

Crying out into the cabin because your belly tenses up. Heat centers into your core as your juices start spewing out onto the mirror. Filled up with Steve so much that there’s no room for anything else. Nothing but wet skin on wet skin. “You're perfect, Dovey. Perfect for me. My greedy little slut takes me like no other woman. Every inch of my cock is inside you, and every bit of my soul is owned by you.”

You clench your eyes shut as the pleasure becomes too much. Your body goes limp and pliant for him as he spears into you so hard you lose all control. His hands are the only thing keeping you upright. “You’re mine.”

“Mine.”

“And I’m yours,” one more hard and particularly deep thrusts hits you so deep that you travel to another plane of existence. A plane where Steve’s body is bare of all his markings and scars. A place where he is whole again. Your body is able to purify him. Cleansing him of all the turmoil that made him who he was. And you get the innocent man that you deserve.

The love you’ve craved to hear from him, you see it in these moments. He was different with you and for you. Nothing has ever been more clear in this plane than the fact that Steve was irrevocably in love with your bratty ass. It was going to be a hard life, but life would never be worth living without him in your life.

His hands go rigid on your hips as he blows his load deep into your belly. His hold softens as he lowers your body flat to the mirror. Letting his softening cock fall out of you, and you whine at the loss, “Shh,” he starts to pick you up, but you lift your ass up into the air. Getting back on your knees.

His eyes drift to your gaping hole, and he watches his cream dribble out of your body before drops land on the mirror, mixing with your juices below our body, “You’ve ruined me, Dove.”

“Good. We’re equal now.”

“We are,” he agrees, continuing to watch himself leave your body drop by drop. A masterpiece if he had ever seen one. “And I love it.”

“You asshole,” you snort. You didn’t even care to try and get him to say those three words anymore. You were content with him giving parts of himself that he had never given anyone else.

“I was going to say you were my best friend, though. Does that help?” It does. Steve didn’t trust easily, didn’t throw around words like best friend lightly. He meant it. And that means more to you than eight letters.

“It does. Now put me to bed, best friend.”

You are equals.

Steve walks into the club a little taller. Shoulders back as he struts in front of his people. Giving a few nods to them before he makes his way into his office. He has no intention of spending an entire day here. He left you satiated and sleepy, and he would love to get back to you.

He wants to spend less time here, and has even continued to think about what Bucky said. He is getting older, and things were getting more dangerous with Rumlow, and whatever Peggy was cooking up. Her time would come soon enough. You don’t double cross Steve Rogers and get away with it.

He is beginning to think about a future that doesn't include this business. Ways to spend the large quantities of money he had made with illegal bullshit. And none of them were without you. Houses in different locations, preferably at the beach so he can watch you walk around in next to nothing all the time. Maybe catch a glimpse of you dripping of ocean water and laying in the sun.

That is what life is about and seeing Bucky content with his choices had opened up Steve’s eyes a bit more. He’d give this one more year. The longer in the game you had the riskier things became. The more power you owned the more people wanted to steal it away from you. And now they had the perfect tool to hold over Steve’s head for ransom. You.

It became too clear to him that you were his everything. This life didn’t matter. The money didn’ mean a damn thing if he didn’t have you to spend it on. And a family. It looked good on Bucky. He’d never seen Bucky happier, and the desire he had to not just fully claim you and connect you to him forever with a legacy that was both of you hit him directly in the heart he thought had been nothing but ashes. And yet he is feeling things he thought were a fairytale.

You awoke something in him he thought he had lost years ago. Humanity. Passion. Fear. Need. A reason to not just survive but to live. All in this perfect human that he didn’t want to miss a single second with. And there is nothing that he wouldn’t do to keep you alive. Alive and living your life to its fullest potential. He needs that for you more than he needs it for him. His life and soul was burned years ago, but you were the beauty in his dark world.

A world that didn’t deserve your light, or the power you could wield with that light. You are remarkable. And you are his.

His head tilts towards his door as Sam walks in. His brows furrowed and they sit low on his face, “I need you to sit down,” Steve starts to respond, arguing about being told what to do, but in Sam’s calming and deep timbre, he tells him again, “Sit down. You need to see this, it’s about Dove.”

Without hesitation he moves to his chair that Sam points to, and he’s met with a computer screen of his home. He looks up at Sam curiously before the other man pushes play for Steve. The video is a bit distorted, but it was taken this morning. Watching your beautiful body walk into frame, and the teasing show you put on for Steve.

A part of Steve wants to smile at how amazing it is to relive this moment until he realizes this isn’t the location of his security cameras, “What. The fuck. Is this?” His fist pounds on the desk, viewing one of the most intimate moments he has ever had with you. How you made yourself completely vulnerable to him. Trying to erase the night that he branded you as his own in the most humiliating way. You retrieved that moment back this morning, and someone saw it.

“Skip to the end,” Sam answers flatly.

Steve reaches towards his keyboard, and skips towards the end where there’s a camera change. This one in your bedroom as he carries you into the bed. Laying you down and kisses all over your worn body. A moment so pure and perfect and it was stolen from him. Kissing over your heated skin until you completely fall asleep, and it pans over to the floor, and some stupid envelope. Staying on something so unimportant that it highlights the words that he utters, and Steve stands up just as the screen goes black.

A mechanical voice vibrates deep into Steve’s core and he seethes. This moment wasn’t for anyone. Not even for you and it was stolen out from under him. A threat. A fucking threat that makes him see red, and ready to light the world on fire, “You’ve been warned.”

With an angry growl, Steve grabs his computer off the desk and hurls it into the floor. Turning to stomp out of his office and back where he came from. “Steve?”

“How the fuck did you get this?”

“It was emailed to us.”

”You saw and heard fucking nothing. I will destroy whatever asshole did this. And I will start with Lark! But I need to know what my goddamn warning was. FUCK! That night Lark was there, did anybody come into the house?”

Sam stares at him a moment. He knows he should have told Steve sooner, and this wasn’t going to go well. “The footage was tampered with,” Steve bellows out a scream that is feral. His face becomes beet red and all he wants is you. “There’s about three minutes missing from the feed.”

“Shut it down.”

“Steve?”

“No one goes in or out of here until I get to Dove. All phones confiscated. I want Natasha to get eyes on Rumlow immediately. You didn’t see or hear anything!” Emphasizing the last word before storming off.

No road laws are followed as he races to get back to the cabin. His phone propped up with a clear view of you dancing around in your little shorts. He should be coming home to you with a smile, and instead it's anger and anxiety. To see you move about with so much joy pains him to know someone had put you at risk. You’re not going to understand. You couldn’t. Not with what was captured, and he wouldn’t explain it.

Slamming his car into park he stomps up the steps, and you run to greet him, “Hey, Captain,” you give him the brightest smile. Happy because you had already missed him. This morning was perfect, but then you see his face, and you frown. “Steve?”

He doesn’t say a word as his long strides carry him to the bedroom with a few steps. Walking right over to the envelope before he picks it up to rip open. Teeth clenching harder with every line before he crumples it and the contents up, and stares out into space. So many things run through his mind, and a part of him dies. The part he was finally getting back completely burns up, and the ashes start to blow away with the wind.

“Steve, what’s going on?” The sound of your voice hits deep into his soul. He had made a private vow to never see you hurt. And you sound hurt. And it would only get worse. Already hating himself, but one look at you, and the thought of anything happening to you is worse than death. He would rather feel the pain of torture than this. The thing worse than death is to ever see anything happen to you.

“Steve?”

“We need to pack your bags. We’ve gotta go,” his voice is lifeless as you switch the weight of your feet. Something was wrong. Off. It feels bad. He says your real name, and your lip starts to tremble. “Either you pack you some bags, or I will.”

“Are you packing a bag, too?” He wasn’t. But if it is what it takes for you to not crumble right now, it’s what he would do. You see the tenseness in his body, and want to scream at him. “Steve?”

He gulps, standing up to walk towards you. Cupping your cheek, he presses a sweet kiss to your lips, but it’s like he’s seeing right past you. “If you’re going to kiss me make it mean something,” Steve’s hands move to your ass, and he picks you up. Making you wrap your legs around him as he holds you so tight. Deepening the kiss, and you melt into his skin. Holding onto him like you are going to lose him.

Feeling every bit of the love he has for you through this one kiss alone. A kiss that reminds you that he is a man that acts instead of says. And what he says is often a lie. His words never match his actions. He pulls away and sets you on the ground before walking towards the closet. “It’s not safe for you here. Do you want to help me pack your things or not?”

Sighing you decide its best to help him. Even if he thinks he knows what’s best.

Sitting on the hotel bed you curiously watch Steve on the balcony. He spent more time avoiding your eyesight and smoking a joint than he did with you. Today should have been a good day. It started off magical, and ended in — this. Confused wasn’t even the word you would use. Hurt? Maybe.

It’s like playing a game of tug-o-war and you know you’re about to lose. All this pushing and pulling you and Steve have been doing this past year made you feel like you were winning, but now it’s like he is ripping the rope right out of your grasp. Something was off and you didn’t like it. The feeling just festers inside your gut and you want to lash out at him.

He hadn’t kissed you again. Hadn’t so much as been sweet to you. It was mostly this; his back pointed towards you. He was avoiding something. And that something is you or something to do with you, and you hate it. You try and take deep breaths as you glare at his beautiful broad back. You had three bags of things, he had a small duffle bag. He was not staying as long as you, and he was lying.

“Steve Rogers, you’re a goddamn coward,” he takes a long drag of his roach, and still doesn’t look at you. Doesn’t acknowledge you said anything. “You could at least tell me the truth since I walk around with your fucking mark on my fucking neck,” sure add in some colorful words and make him want to punish you.

“You’re the biggest coward I have ever met, and you still won’t look at me,” you watch, ready to take the punishment as long as he looks at you. “Look. At. Me,” your words are harsh and spit through your teeth. You need him to feel the panic that is settling in your body. Putting out his joint, he slowly turns to look you in the face and his eyes are haunted. “Look at me!”

“I am.”

“No, look at me! See me. See all of me,” you scream, pulling off your clothes. “I need you to fucking see me, and you tell me what the fuck is going on!” he twists his neck again, and a sickening pop runs down his spine. “What the fuck are you going to do about my fucking attitude and using this fucking language, huh? Fuck you, Steve Rogers. Fuck you,” adding emphasis you throw up your middle fingers, and he sprints towards you.

Picking you up and he throws your now naked onto the bed. His thick body goes in between your legs, spreading you out and with one hand he messes around with his jeans. Struggling to get them undone, so you reach up and help him. “You see how wet my fucking pussy is from pissing you the fuck off?”

“You better shut your fucking mouth, Dove,” finally. It is violent and intense, but he said the nickname you have grown to adore. Ripping off his shirt, he spits down to your hole. Steve’s hand grips onto his member before he runs it through your slick. “You’re such a fucking slut,” he grits out, soaking his cock in your wet heat.

“Then you better fucking do something about it,” he growls low. Gripping each side of your cheeks with his thumb and fingers before he slams into you. Taking your breath away and rolling your eyes into the back of your head. You pissed him off. Good. “Fuck you! Fuck you, Steve!”

There’s no care in the way he pistons into you. Fucking you like you were some random whore that he was using to get off. Cheapening whatever this bond is between the two of you. Something is off. “Fuck you,” your voice loses the edge to it. It hurts, and not in a physical way. He’s tugging harder and harder at that rope, attempting to take it away completely.

“Fuck you,” your voice now a whisper as he fucks you harder. Still not meeting your eyes. Clenching his eyes close, and it kills you. “Fuck you. I hate you.”

“Good,” you let out a strangled sob with that one word. Giving up as he rips on that rope harder. You are losing your fight, and he was removing every bit of the rope from your hands, “But I’ll make you this promise, Dove. I promise that you will feel me etched in every part of your skin. That when you fuck another man that you still feel my cock buried deep in your body. So deep you can’t escape it. Every time some man looks at you, you remember the way I made you so weak. You’ll hate the ground that those men walk on because they’ll never be me. You’ll crave my touch and the way that I stretch you out.”

The rope is pulled completely out of your hands, and you lie below him, limp and in so much emotional pain you’re numb. His motions, and his words still don’t stop. They cut so deep that tears pour down your face. “You’ll never escape. And no man will ever make you feel the way that I do. I have left my mark on you so deep that you’re forever changed. You’re not longer that girl that I made my slut.”

“I hate you,” uttered words that mean nothing to him. Hate is just as strong as love, and you despise that you feel for him so deeply during whatever the fuck this is. You want to feel nothing for Steve Rogers, and still you feel everything.

“And you, sweet Dovey, have left your mark on me, too,” he pulls himself out of you, and you let out a strangled no as he spurts his cum on your stomach. The last fragment of the rope gone from your finger tips as he comes on your stomach just like a slut, “Don’t call me. Don’t look for me. Don’t reach out to me.”

“I’m just your whore now?”

“You’re nothing. You mean nothing. There’s money for you in one of your bags, I’ve paid for your troubles. Create a new life and forget this,” still he can’t meet your eyes as he removes that rope, and out of your hand and grasp. There’s no emotion in his words. They’re so monotone, and you hate him. But you want to erase every bit of him instead. Nothing could ever hurt as worse as being made to be a paid for slut to Steve Rogers.

“You’re goddamn liar. Spoken like a true fork tongued lying bastard!”

You let out the fiercest scream you can muster, staring right at him, but he robotically dresses himself, throwing a towel over you, “Clean yourself up,” he whispers before he walks out the door and out of your life.

A coward if you have ever seen one.

And you were a goddamn fool.

Next

Masterlist

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[marvelous-slut]

Call Back - Chibs Telford x Reader

YALL!! I can’t lie, I am a hoe for this troupe if you can’t tell from my other works. Like the close friends daughter? Idk it makes me feral. I swear to god I don’t have daddy issues, like I have the best dad ever so idk why I’m like this but here’s this work that has been stuck in my drafts for weeks.

MINORS DNI. 18+ ONLY! Age gaps & smut.

You watched the club members make their way into the club house as you puffed on the joint that rested between your fingers. Chucky had kept you company while you waited for them to come back from a run. As much as you wanted to slap the shit out of Chibs when he come through the door, you held back. Knowing you couldn’t risk Clay finding out that one of his most trusted members had been with his daughter right under his nose. Even if through all the rage you felt right now toward him, you’d never want him to get hurt.

While the MC was on a run, you’d realized you’d forgot many of your things at Chibs house the night before they left. He told you were the extra key was through text for you to get them back, a part of you wished you’d never went in. You found your things and as you did, the phone rung. Before you shut the door to leave, you heard a voice mail being recorded and decided to stay and listen. Sure, maybe it was a little bit of an invasion of privacy but you wanted to know who else needed to talk to him besides the club and you.

“It’s Fi. Fillip, I want our family back. Jimmy is gone, hasn’t been here for months. Haven’t heard from him either. There’s no sense in us stayin’ apart now. Let me know when you get this, please.” Family? What family? The only family you’d known Chibs to have was the MC. You cursed yourself for not listening to Clay and Gemma more when they’d talk about the members and their lives. You’d think the feelings you’d had for Chibs through the years of being around the club would have made your ears perk up when they’d chat about him. Maybe it was a detail you’d heard and didn’t care about, as you’d never met or seen him with a woman, thinking it was an old fling. Chucky filled you in once you brought it up, telling you how Chibs had been married before with a daughter. He didn’t know much more besides that.

“You gotta go home, no need for you to be here.” Clay says, throwing his bag on the pool table. “And put that shit out, this place reeks of pot cause of you.” He walks past you, just like you were a stranger in the house. You didn’t know what happened on the run, but it had to be something tough. Clay typically treated you and Gemma both like dirt on his shoes when a run went bad or an issue come up with the club. It didn’t make the coldness he came off with sting any less. The hurt was plastered on your face, you put your joint out in the ash tray and ran out of the club house in tears. Pushing past Chibs as you did. Jax looks at him, confused as to what happened.

“Think it’s somethin’ with Clay. I’ll go make sure she’s okay.” He says, Jax nods his head and follows the rest into the house. Jax cared about you, sometimes both of you thought he cared more about you than Clay but right now he had to fill his role as VP.

“Love,” He begins to say. You turn around, laughing as you did. Between the new found information of him being married and your fathers cold demeanor toward you, something snapped inside of you.

“Shut up!” You yell at him, he’s confused and shocked as you’d never talked to anyone this way before in your whole life. Even if you had Gemma for a step mom you weren’t quick to yell out in anger or use your fists to resolve issues like her, even sometimes being like a dog that keeps getting beat down makes anyone eventually explode. “Don’t you have a fucking wife to get back to?” You ask, Chibs eyes widen. He’s speechless and you take the opportunity to get in your car and drive off from the club. Wanting to be anywhere but here.

_____

You laid on your bed looking up at the ceiling, unable to think of anything other than Chibs. Even your father snapping at you today didn’t hurt like this did. That you were used to, being lied to by someone you trusted deeply wasn’t. It was 12:42AM, not a word from Chibs or Clay. You were shocked that Gemma hadn’t been crawling up your ass to find out where you were. Typically you’d go over to visit before heading to your house but today you just wanted to be alone. Trying to sleep hadn’t worked out in your favor and you’re forced to lay in bed with only your many racing thoughts. Before anything else can cross your mind, you hear a knock at the door. You grab your pistol, not knowing who would be here at this time of night. When you look through the peep hole, you’re somewhat shocked at who you see.

“What do you want?” You ask, opening the door. A part of you was excited that he was here so the two of you could talk, but the anger in you didn’t want to see him at all.

“I want to talk.” He says, pushing past you into the house. You couldn’t lie, it was kind of hot that he asserted himself like this. It was always sexy when he did it, one of the many reasons you liked him. He sits down on the couch and you sit on the other end, looking at him. He was looking at you, almost like he was waiting on an explanation. You chuckled, slapping your hands on your thighs as you did.

“What?” You ask sharply, he leans back into the cushions, placing his hands on the top of his head.

“I listened to the voicemail that you heard, and deleted it as soon as it was done playin’. I married Fi when I was in Ireland and younger, a man named Jimmy O got me kicked out of the IRA and married Fi. Raised my daughter, Kerrianne.” This was a lot to process right now, your head still swimmy from the tears youd shed through the day. “Also, did this to ma face.” He says, pointing at the scars that ran over his cheeks. You sit, listening to everything he’s saying. It sounds like some kind of TV show, how the hell do you get kicked out of a country unless you’re a terrorist?

“Listen lass, I should have told you about Fi and my Kerrianne, but it just wasn’t something I thought about bringin’ up to ya. You make me forget all the bad shit in my life, when I’m with ya I don’t have to think about any of it.” He moves over to sit beside you, brushing a piece of hair out of your face. “Fi hasn’t had a hold on me since the day you decided to spill ya drink on me.” You smiled at him and laughed. It was your first night back in Charming after moving away for college, Chibs only faintly remembered you when you were younger but you’d made an impression on him your first night back. Being drunk out of your mind, staggering everywhere and eventually bumping into him and your drink flying all over him. You sigh deeply, looking away from him as you attempt to hold anymore tears from coming out. He turns your head back to him, resting his forehead onto yours.

“I know it’s wrong and I know Clay would put a bullet in ma head if he knew about this, but I love you lass. I can’t help it.” He says, at this moment you don’t need to hear anything else he has to say. You lay your lips onto his and he returns the favor. You feel his rough and calloused hands run up your leg, shivering as the coldness from his rings hits your skin. You let out a soft whimper as you’d missed this familiar feeling of his hands on your body.

“How I’ve missed that noise.” He breathes out, breaking the kiss. You stand up, adjusting your clothes. You don’t know why you did, sooner rather than later they’d be scattered across the floor anyways. You reach a hand out and he accepts, following you to your bedroom. Once the two of you are in, he sheds his kutte and lays it on the desk that sits in your corner. The familiar scent of whiskey and cigarette smoke takes over your senses as he places his lips to your neck, kissing gently and carefully not to leave a mark on your precious skin. Before you knew it, your shorts and underwear were scattered on the ground along with his clothes. You lay down on the bed as he hovers over you, typically you got things rolling by landing on your knees for him but he felt like he needed to make this about you. The beads that hang from his neck are hanging in-front of your face, a sight you’ll never get tired of seeing. You feel his hand sliding to your dripping cunt, he slides in two fingers and you arch your back in pleasure. He would have started off with one, but he knew you’d immediately tell him to add another just like you always did.

“So beautiful.” He says as he’s kissing the inside of your thighs. “So wet.” The kisses, how his fingers curl inside of you, hitting your spot just right it was all enough to send your head spinning. His fingers are buried deep in you, but he’s moving them at such an agonizing pace. Knowing you were going insane and silently begging him to spend up his movements. He leans down to you, placing his lips onto yours. This time it’s messy, almost sloppy but you don’t mind.

“Always takin’ my fingers so well, can you still take this cock just as good love?” It had been a few weeks since the two of you had sex due to him being on the run and you’d longed for this moment since the day he left with the MC for Tacoma. You nodded your head yes, knowing if you tried to speak you’d just embarrass yourself by stammering around. He slides himself into you, your hands tighten around his arms as you feel yourself stretch around him. Once he’s buried himself into you and sees the pleasure across your face, he starts to thrust into you slowly trying to set his pace.

“Fuck.” You manage to moan out, he moves the hair from your face so he can take in your beauty. To the both of you, the sex you had was like a drug. Once never being enough. The first time it happened, he insisted it would be the last as well. The minute he slid himself inside of you, seeing your face and feeling you clench around him he knew he’d made himself a liar. Every-time was sensual, even when it was a quick fuck it was always meaningful.

“You always take me so well, love. Almost like this pussy was made just for me.” He lets out as the grip on your hips tightens. You feel your stomach begin to tighten, your face burning and you know you’re there. He knows it too, pumping into you steadily but harsher. “Be a good girl and let go all over me aye?” The words sent you over the edge, bucking your hips against him to intensify the experience. It sends him over the edge, watching you like you can’t get enough of him and he releases into you. Not worrying wether there was a condom on or not. He pulls himself out, grabbing a towel to help you clean up and get himself situated. You wrap yourself up in a silk robe as you watch him dress, knowing the worst moment of him leaving was coming.

“You know you can stay right? Dad shouldn’t be down this way anytime soon.” You tried your best, hoping he’d give in. He sighs, tightening his belt. He walks over to you, kissing your forehead.

“I’ll see you tomorrow love. I have some things to take care of tonight.”

Chibs rides home, it’s almost 3AM and he’s feeling it as his eye lids become heavier and heavier. He silently thanks God when he makes it inside that he didn’t crash his bike into a semi on his way here from the fatigue. He sits on the couch, staring at the phone. He listens to the voicemail from Fiona once more, thinking of her and the life they had. How they had a shot of getting that back. His mind then went to you, he loved you and he couldn’t shake the feeling. He hated to lie to you, but at this moment he didn’t know which path to go down. Telling you the voicemail and feelings for his wife were gone was better than saying “I don’t really know what to do”. He couldn’t bare the thought of hurting you as he’d already seen how that went earlier in the day at the club house.

He didn’t fear anyone, but he knew it would be tricky with you due to Clay. He knew he’d never be able to boast or call you his old lady. Things would be a secret till the day Clay died, and Chibs didn’t like keeping those. He picked up the phone and dialed the familiar number, praying he’d get the mailbox before he had anymore time to think.

“Hey Fi. It’s Fillip. Just wanted to see if you still wanted to talk.”

[allywthsr]

FOLLOW THE WHITE RABBIT | (l.norris)

summary: Lando and you talk about the cheating rumors, you find out the truth and you solve things between each other. Part two to Reckless

wordcount: 5.4k words

pairing: landonorris x singer!femreader

warnings: panic attack, crying (let me know if I missed anything)

notes: the love part one got, made my heart throb. Thank you!!!! I hope you like whatever I wrote there, also the first time I used text messages and tweets, tell me what you think about them!! I used follow the white rabbit by Madison Beer for this part! I deleted some lyrics, hope you don’t mind.

You were not ready for Lando to come home. Not ready at all.

You didn’t know who you should believe, him or the pictures that were posted all over the internet. Of course you wanted to believe him, you‘ve been in a relationship with him for over five years now, he never gave you a reason to doubt him. But the picture literally had proof on them, showing him in the act of kissing this woman. And we‘re not talking a smooch we’re talking full on make out session in the middle of the club. His excuse better be good or you would leave, and if he started to blame the alcohol you would be fuming. Alcohol is not an excuse to kiss other people, even when you‘re drunk you need to think of your significant other.

Normally Lando wasn’t even planing to come home, the plan was that he flew straight to Belgium for the next race weekend and you would join him there, but now you weren’t sure if you wanted to go and see him race, even if things cleared between you two. But you weren’t sure if they would, even when there was an explanation for it, he still kissed this girl and met up with her multiple times in Monaco. And there‘s no denying it, there were pictures that clearly showed him with her.

You wanted things fixed with him, you loved him with your whole heart, he was your person. What are you gonna do if things didn’t work out? Move back to your home country? Stay in Monaco? Move somewhere you‘ve never lived before? You had absolutely no clue.

The wait felt like days, you walked around your apartment, cleaning here and there, trying to calm your nerves. You settled in the living room waiting for Lando to arrive. After three and a half hours you finally heard the door unlock, now your heartbeat fastened, you had the feeling that your heart was going to jump out of your chest, and you thought that you were going to faint. Too scared that things won’t work out and you‘ve spent the last five and a half years with Lando for nothing. You wanted to marry him, you wanted to have children with him, you wanted to build your forever home, you wanted to get a dog, and you couldn’t imagine all these things with someone else. You did not think you could ever love someone as much as you loved him.

”Y/N?“, you froze. Nope, you wanted to leave, this was too much for you. You couldn’t talk with him, look him in the eye or be in his presence.

You didn’t answer him, you wanted to but when you tried to speak, nothing came out.

”Y/N, are you there?“, he asked again. Tears started to form in your eyes, you were fucking scared. And before anything else happened you started to feel a panic attack coming, something you‘ve been familiar with but especially in the last hours had constantly. You started shaking and crying silently, breathing way too fast and not being able to help yourself getting out of it, you curled into a little ball, hugging your knees while putting your head on them while you rocked back and forth.

So when you heard footsteps nearing, you panicked even more. By now you were shaking uncontrollably and your sobs got louder and louder, you felt like fainting with the little air you only got. Lightheaded you looked up and saw Lando standing in the middle of the living room.

”Y/N what the fuck, are you okay?“, you just shook your head and before you could take another breath he was next to you on the couch, taking you in his arms and squeezing you tight. The tears were just falling down your face and Lando thought about calling an ambulance. He had experienced you having a panic attack quite often, he even had some himself when he first got to formula one and the pressure became too much but he‘d never seen an attack being that bad. He just hoped his presence would calm you down, as it normally would but after the articles, he wasn’t that sure anymore.

”Hey Y/N, breathe Baby, you need to breathe. Do it like me“, he started to slowly breathe in with his nose loudly and held it in for a few seconds and then blew the air out of his mouth. You really did try to breathe like him, but your sobs interrupted you before you could breathe in. He held you tighter in hopes that he could stop your shaking but it only got worse.

”Is it better if I not touch you? I don’t want that you get worse only because I hug you“, but you just clawed your hands in his arm that was wrapped around your front and shook your head slightly.

”No? You want me to hug you?“, you squeezed his arm tighter and started to lean in his body a little.

”Okay, Baby you need to breathe or I need to call a doctor, this is not healthy and I can’t get you out of this headspace. You‘ll be fine, listen okay? Breath like me.“

You slowly took a breath in and before you could hold it, you let out a sob and another.

”I can’t breathe “, you pressed out of your lungs while trying to get some air.

”I know baby, but you need to come back to me, it‘ll all be fine. We are fine, okay? I love you so much but you need to come back to me love“, you tried so hard to breath normal but the panic attack was stronger and the sobs spilled out of your mouth again.

”I feel like I’m going to faint Lando.“

Now he started to panic, he really has never seen it that bad before, he needed to call a doctor, he couldn’t help you alone.

Then Lando got an idea, he wanted to use a technique you showed him and he never got the chance to try it out but now was the perfect timing.

”Baby I know, let’s do the senses thing you showed me okay?“, you just nodded while shaking.

” What are five things you can see?“

You lift your head from your knees and looked around.

”Y-You, the tab-table“, you took a shaky breath.

”It’s okay baby, take your time and breath.“

”The couch, the plan-plant, the lamp.“

”Good job angel, breath. Now what are four things you can touch?“

”Y-Y-You“, you were interrupted by a sob, ”The couch, my phone, the table.“

”Yes baby, now take a deep breath“, you looked into his eyes and repeated the breathing he did.

”Good, three things you can hear?“

You looked back through the room, focusing on what you can hear at the moment, allowing your brain to calm down.

”Your voice, the neighbors drilling something in the wall and my phone pinging with messages.“

”Exactly“, he pressed a kiss on the side of your head, ”two things you can smell?“

”You and the room perfume I sprayed this morning.“

”Good job love“, he noticed how you were much calmer than he started, barely letting out a sob and only a little shaky.

”And what is one thing you can taste?“

You chuckled, ”You.“

He let out a quiet laugh, ”Yes baby. Breathe okay? Do it with me.“

You turned your face back to his face and after he took a deep breath through his nose, you repeated after him.

”Hold it.“

You nodded and together you hold the air for about five seconds, and after that, you both let the air out through the mouth. He repeated that three more times and after that, you were back to your old self.

”Welcome back love, do you need anything? Water or do you want to lie down? Sleep for an hour?“

You shook your head and answered him with a: ”I need you.“ He whispered an ’Okay‘ and placed his head on yours, enjoying the embrace you guys were still in. After what felt like hours of sitting there, it was probably only ten minutes, he slowly let go of you, and you whined when he did that.

”I‘m gonna get some water and then we can talk, yeah?“

You nodded and let out a breath, too scared to fall back into a panic attack, you weren’t ready for what was coming.

When he came back with two glasses of water and placed them on the little coffee table and sat on the couch across from you, he began.

”So it looks bad, but it’s not like everyone says it happened. Yes, I kissed her, well, she kissed me. But only for two seconds and maybe it looks like a full make out but I swear it was only for like three seconds. She pulled my head down and wrapped my hands around her waist and before I could react she kissed me, but I immediately pushed her away. My brain needed a second to register what was happening because I was in such a shaken state, and that’s where they took a picture.“

”But you hung out with her in Monaco, and she was in Hungary when you were racing.“

”Yes I-“, he didn’t know what to say, it wasn’t like he was searching for an excuse but more like the right words, ”I met up with her because she‘s actually the sister of a friend, and he asked me to pick her up because he couldn’t and didn’t want her to walk. I‘ve met her a few times at his‘ and yeah that’s basically it.“

”You literally went with her on a walk after I asked you to go with me to the docks for some fresh air!“, you argued, now getting frustrated.

”Yes and I have no excuse for that. I did go for a walk with her, but I don’t know what to tell you. She wanted us to be friends and friends hang out, so she asked me to meet her at the city.“

”So you ditched me, your girlfriend, for some chick and did not tell me about it? You could literally have asked me to go with you and we could‘ve met up with her.“

”I know and it’s stupid, but I guess I was overwhelmed with the race weekend coming up and so I didn’t thi-“

”No! You do not get to blame this on your job. This is you being a bitch.“

He chuckled, ”I was, but believe me, I never had any intention to do anything with her.“

”But she did!“

”Well, I know that now.“

”And what about my release party? This album is literally about you and you didn’t come? Do you even have an idea how embarrassed I was? Your family was there and they didn’t catch a glimpse of you the whole time they were in Monaco. I stood there all alone talking about how happy you made me and when people asked me about you, I had to tell them you were at the MTC. Everyone thought you were the biggest jerk for leaving when I had an important day. I travel around the world for you, I move meetings, and recording sessions just so I can join you for a race. I asked you to come for one day, one fucking day and you didn’t show. I even put the release date like that, so it wouldn’t be on a race week, so you could attend and my ass wouldn’t be alone. But I was alone, in this room full of people I love, I was alone because you weren’t there. I came home early and you weren’t even home and when I checked your location you were somewhere in Monaco. You could‘ve texted, you could‘ve called, yet - nothing. I thought you had some huge thing planned as a surprise for me but you didn’t even apologize. You just came home late and didn’t even think about me. I cried in our bed and you came in, changed your clothes and fell asleep immediately. Just the next day you said ’Oh I‘m sorry I didn’t come‘ and went on with your day? I literally cried on my release day, but not happy tears, that’s just fucking sad dude. This might not be a big deal to you, but releasing an album isn’t something you do every weekend.“, you started to pick at your sweatpants trying to distract your tears from falling down your cheeks. All the emotions came back from that day.

”I‘m so sorry I made you feel that way. I wanted to come I promise, I even bought that huge bouquet of your favorite flowers but then she called me and“, you let out a scoff, of course she called him, ”told me she her car broke down in the middle of nowhere and I was the only one she could reach. I had to help her and it took way longer than I expected, the tow truck took two hours to find our location, so when we finished and I drove her home because her car was in some repair shop, she invited me into her flat and we just had a soda relaxing from all the stress and I forgot to go to the party. I just remembered when I found the flowers in the trunk of my car the next morning, but they were all dead because they didn’t get any water all night long. This is not an excuse, I just want you to know what happened. And nothing will change the fact that I missed one of the most important nights of this year, but I am truly sorry. If I could go back and do it differently, I would immediately but I can’t. And I have no clue how to make it up to you, I could buy you another handbag or whatever but nothing could make it better. I still feel like an idiot, if that helps?“

”Not really, I am still super mad at you, you have no idea.“

”And you have every right to be. But I am really so fucking sorry, I never wanted to make you feel this way.“

”But how did she end up in Hungary?“

”I invited her“, your head turned to his at a speed of light, ”What?!“, you screamed at him.

”This girl is literally flirting with you, trying to get you away from me every second of the day and you invite her to your race? No wonder she kissed you. She must’ve thought this was you telling her it’s something serious.“

”What? Y/N, no, you’re delusional.“

”Lando, I know how girls work, especially the bad ones. You might be my first relationship but my friends have told me about them.“

”But that’s not why I wanted her to come. She asked me if she could ever come to a race because she’s never been. And we had a spare ticket because you didn’t come so I asked her.“

”That’s bullshit, she obviously wanted something from you and you didn’t see it.“

”Well, I‘m sorry. I don’t know what else to tell you. I messed up and I‘m a horrible boyfriend but I can’t change things now. I just know that I never wanted anything from her, I invited her because I thought she was a friend and I helped her with her car because she was a friend. If I had known her intention, I would’ve never even picked her up in the first place.“

”You‘re not a horrible boyfriend. But over the last three weeks, you weren’t a good one either. I felt so alone in this country I never wanted to move to in the first place. Yes, it’s beautiful and all but doesn’t feel like home, I miss my friends so badly, but they‘re all in the UK. And I don’t want to blame you for this because this decision was made by both of us but you told me, you would never leave me alone for long. Because I have barely anyone here. Yes, the girlfriends of your friends but I can live without them as well. I almost booked a flight two weeks ago to go home, because if I’m alone here I can go home alone. This city will never be my forever home, I hope you didn’t forget this.“

”I am sorry Y/N. And of course, I didn’t forget about you not being a hundred percent happy with Monaco, if you want we can start looking at lots to build on in England. Building a house is not something you do in a week, so if you want we start looking for them. I will not leave you alone from now on, I promise.“

”But how are we gonna come back from this?“

”What do you mean?“

”Lando, I can’t just go back to what it was like before it all started. I love you so much, but you also hurt me. And I’m still fucking sad over the things you did, even if you didn’t cheat.“

”I love you too, but you believe me, right? I never wanted anything from her, trust me.“

”I guess, the wounds are still fresh, so I need you to give me time. I need time to heal and get over it.“

”Of course Baby, take all the time you need. I just don’t want us to break up over someone stupid. She‘s not worth any of your tears. She‘s just this stupid bitch, and I know that now.“

”I don’t want us to break up over this as well but I need the time and I will fly home as soon as I can. I don’t want to go to Spa with you, I need time apart to calm down. That doesn’t mean I want a break or anything just some time for myself.“

”Are you sure that’s something you want?“

”No, I need this. I am not happy here and I don’t want to be in the paddock right now, I need some family and friends time and especially time for myself.“

He nodded and stood up. Now he was the one with the glossy eyes and pouting lip.

”Lando, why are you crying?“

You stood up and walked to hug him.

”I am just so sorry Y/N. I never wanted to hurt you and now you need time away from me. Which is fine but I am so fucking sorry“, he let out a quiet sob and the first tear spilled out of his left eye. You hugged him even tighter and now his arms slang around your body to return the hug. His head found its way to your neck and let it rest there, crying quietly. You let him cry everything out and even spilled some tears of your own. This was not a breakup, but you needed time apart. You knew how Lando was, he would do everything to express how sorry he was. Getting you gifts, flowers and whatnot just to suppress his feelings. But you didn’t want that, you wanted him to understand why you were sad and needed to go home, and by buying you gifts he wouldn’t understand.

After holding him in your arms for good five minutes he started to talk again: ”Did you write a song already?“, he slowly lifted his head from your shoulder and looked with his red eyes into yours. You chuckled, ”Yes I did, it’s called Reckless, but I don’t know if I‘ll release it, I mean you didn’t cheat in the end.“

”You should, to show the world what kind of asshole I am.“

”Baby, you’re not an asshole, I love you so much. Never see yourself as anything bad, you just hurt me, yes, but we hurt people all the damn time. But we solved it, just because I need to go home for a week or two doesn’t mean I hate you. You just need to realize what you did wrong and heal yourself. I don’t want you to think bad of yourself, you did some questionable things, but it’s not like you actually cheated. Okay? You‘re my person, my love, my baby and nothing can separate me from you.“

He just nodded. He needed some time for himself, you both knew that you both needed time to come back even stronger. So you went and packed all the things you needed for a week at home and booked a ticket for the next flight.

”When are you coming back home from Spa?“, you asked Lando, you wanted to book a flight to Monaco already, so you had no choice but to come back home to Lando.

”On Monday evening, then we planned to go on vacation on Wednesday, but I don’t know if you still want to come?“

”Of course, I‘ll come with you on our yearly family holiday, are you mad? Spending weeks on a yacht with only sunshine and you and your family is like a dream. I miss my Mila and I need my Mila cuddles. I‘ll fly back home to Monaco on Tuesday morning so I‘ll be back by Lunch time and we have enough time to pack.“

You looked at him, the way he sat on the bed, looking like he‘d lost the fight of his life, his arms were crossed before his chest, his legs were moving the whole time, too nervous to actually settle and his head was leaned against the headboard of the bed.

��Hey Lando, calm down, it’s only a week, you need to fly to Spa tomorrow anyway. Concentrate on your race, I‘ll be watching and supporting you from home“, you sat next to his leg and patted it.

”We‘re okay Lando. I forgive you, don’t worry. I just need a few days for myself and after I come back, we‘ll be just like before everything happened. So get your shit together and smile for me.“

He gave you a big smile, satisfied with it, you gave him a quick peck on his lips and stood up to gather the rest of your things. When you packed the rest of your toiletries in your bag, closing it with the zipper you let out a sigh and asked yourself if you really wanted to do this. You looked in the mirror and you knew the answer if you looked at yourself. You had bags under your eyes, they didn’t sparkle like they used to and your skin wasn’t rosy anymore. These three weeks took a toll on your whole being, you didn’t smile as much, and you for sure didn’t feel any happiness. But you were sure that after the week away from Monaco, you and Lando would come back stronger and everything would be okay again.

So when you stood with your luggage at the front door, Lando leaned to the wall next to it. You guys didn’t talk and just enjoyed the silence, both lost in your thoughts. When your phone got a notification, your Uber arrived and was ready to pick you up and take you to the airport. You wanted to now do it on your own and almost argued with Lando because you didn’t want him to take you. The week away starts now and he needed to accept that. He did something wrong, even if it wasn’t really his fault but he still met up with her and she was able to kiss him.

”I should go, my Uber is here.“

Lando just nodded and his head sunk, the first tear escaping his eye.

”Baby, please don’t cry. I‘ll see you in a week, you need to focus on your race, I don’t want you crashing just because I‘m home. You can text and call me whenever, it’s not like I‘m dead, I might not react immediately, because I want to do a little phone detox and maybe record some songs but if there’s an emergency, you have my parents' numbers and my siblings. My best friends as well, just focus and get another podium yeah? I‘ll be cheering you on from home.“

”I‘m sorry Y/N. I need you.“

”You have me, always. But just give me a week, let me calm down, and then we‘ll be back to our old selves. We will get over this and we‘ll be fine.“

He nodded and looked at you, his red watery eyes made you feel guilty, but now you needed to think about yourself. So you grabbed the handle of your luggage, put your free hand on his cheek, pressed your lips to his for a kiss, and stepped through the door.

”I love you, Lando, keep me updated.“

”I love you too Y/N. Please be careful.“

”Always.“

So when he closed the door behind you, one tear fell down your cheek but you wanted this and now it’s too late to go back. Your Uber drove you to the airport and you grabbed a mask, sunglasses and pulled your hood up, hoping that no one will notice you or at least recognize you. You loved meeting Lando’s fans but you just wanted to listen to your music while you waited for your flight to board. But luck wasn’t on your side today, while you waited for your flight to board, you saw multiple photographers taking pictures of you and you pulled your hood more into your face hoping they wouldn’t catch a glimpse of your face. You still cried a lot earlier and you did not look like your best self right now.

After your plane finally boarded and left the airport, you took a deep breath. Ready to relax at home with your family.

f1gossip

22,827 likes

Y/N was seen in the Airport! We don’t know where she is going but she clearly does not wanna be recognized. People that waited in line with her said, that she cried the whole time while waiting. Is our favorite couple now actually over? We have no confirmation, but we‘ll update you, when we know something

two days later

/////////////////////////////

You smiled when you left the plane, you had missed Lando terribly over the last week. That showed you how you guys were meant to be.

Your new song ’Reckless’ was a banger, everybody loved it, little did they know you already wrote a new one.

Lando told you, that he would wait for you in the entrance hall and drive you back home.

So when you got your luggage and went to the entrance hall you searched for the familiar face. But you just spotted a huge bouquet of flowers and behind them, was his beautiful grinning face. So you run the last meters to him and embracing him in a tight hug, hearing the sounds of cameras clicking, you didn’t care, you needed to feel him close to you. So when you broke the hug and looked into each other's eyes, you kissed. Just a quick one, you didn’t want to have a make-out session on the internet.

”I am so happy to be back“, you whispered in his ear.

”You have no idea how much I missed you. Let’s go home, I wanna show how much I missed you.“

f1gossip

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Lando and Y/N at the airport! Y/N arrived back in town a week after leaving, Lando waited with a huge bouquet for her and they shared this bone crashing hug after seeing the other. So is our otp back again? We hope that they‘re happy!

y/nusername added to their story!

Boy, I heard my name's on the tip of your tongue

You knew how badly Lando wanted to call you every day when you were in your home country. He texted you every morning that he wished you were next to him. Reporters tried not to ask Lando about the rumors but it was almost impossible. He just wanted to scream in everybody’s face that you guys were good and didn’t break up.

And I'm empty too, if that is what you want

But the truth is, you weren’t better. Your mum wanted you to leave asap, the crying of how much you missed him became unbearable for your family.

And I looked into your eyes and you're the one

When you FaceTimed and saw him, you knew he was the one. He was your love, your person, your everything.

That I wanted, baby, that I wanted, baby, that I wanted

You wanted him so bad, no, you needed him. You needed him because without him you couldn’t really function.

It's a haunting, baby, that I'm wanting

Baby, that I'm wanting, wanting you

Haunting, baby, that I'm wanting, baby, that I'm wanting

It scared you how much you wanted him. You sat late at night on your childhood bed and thought about the first time you brought Lando here. Everybody loved him and accepted him into the family. You needed him and it was scary.

And I lose my mind tonight over you

Thinking back to the time, you started fuming. How the press played such a big role in the whole thing, they made you believe things that weren’t even true.

Devil in a dress, I'ma love you like I do

You still loved him, even when all the ugly articles and rumors started to come up, you still loved him.

Follow the white rabbit to see the truth

You talked with Lando and he showed you what really happened. With all the stupid rumors, you believed him. The articles were a way to distract you, to show you the wrong way, to believe the wrong people but in the end, you saw the truth.

And my patience is now setting like the sun

When Lando arrived back on Monday, you had a panic attack but you were also impatient. Wanting to hear what he had to say, what really happened, whether it would be good or not.

When my tears fall on your lap, we've just begun

You don’t remember the attack you had, but Lando later told you how you cried in his arms while he tried to calm you down. It was the beginning of the conversation, what a great start. Not.

And by now, I know the damage has been done

The time will never be able to be reversed. Nothing can and will ever repair the scars you got from this. He still hung out with a girl while you sat lonely in your shared flat. It happened and you can’t do anything to undo it.

That I wanted, baby, that I wanted, baby, that I wanted

It's a haunting, baby, that I'm wanting

Baby, that I'm wanting, wanting you

Haunting, baby, that I'm wanting, baby, that I'm wanting

Lando told you, that he was scared of how much he missed and wanted you to come home. You laughed about it, feeling the exact same. It was scary how your minds were connected and felt the same as the other one was feeling.

Follow the white rabbit to see the truth

You were glad how things worked out. That showed you how strong your relationship is, that even after this scandal, you still found your way back to each other. It also showed you how important talking with each other was. Talking is key and you are glad you are in a relationship where you talk about things.

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taglist: @mrsmaybank13

[divaofmads]

Queen of Heart | Joel Miller

Inspired by a song ~

!!WARNING!!: Smut, +18 only, Fluff, Sex with a Strange Man, Bad Language, Slang using, Depressed, No Y/N (also used "she"), cigarette using, Age Gap ( you are in your early 20s and Joel is in his late 30s), Soft Joel, Before Apocalypse

Please leave comment

A/N: I apologize for the mistakes I made in English that is not my native language and I am trying to improve my writing skills.

It was a Thursday evening, heralding the arrival of winter. It was raining as if it enjoyed making people experience its cold and gloomy spirit. Puddles had turned into lakes, people had opened their umbrellas to avoid getting wet, and those who were unaware of the weather warnings had taken shelter in their coats and bags for protection. Everyone was in a rush. Their steps were fast, their movements were hurried. But fate had no mercy on their pitiful state. As if it enjoyed people's helplessness, it made everything worse. Traffic jams, accidents, people cursing because they couldn't get to where they needed to be... All of these were like a hag blocking the magnificence of the night.

Joel was the only one who submitted to fate that night. He had stuffed his hands into the pockets of his coat to protect himself from the biting cold, and had pulled the collar up and zipped it up to the tip of his nose so that the steam trapped behind the fabric could warm his lips and cheeks, which had become numb by the cold.

He had chosen another way to get home. Since his daughter Sarah was staying over at his uncle’s house, he could forget about responsibilities. He wanted to walk for a long time, all by himself. When he entered a street with broken lights, instead of the angry sounds of the city, the sound of rain hitting the concrete echoed in his ears. He was walking between apartment walls which plaster was cracked and bricks were visible. Dogs and rats hid in spray-painted garbage containers or in cardboard boxes thrown next to the containers. As the wind blew hard, the expired concert posters hanging on the wall could no longer hold on and were flying in the air. Joel’s boots were completely soaked. If he walked any further down the alley, his shoes would slowly start to absorb water.

But Joel’s past kept coming back to him. Every memory was harassing him, coming back to him and making him feel hopeless. The best thing that had ever happened to him in his life was his daughter. She was his luck. When the woman he loved left them, he hoped for a connection with his daughter. But now the feelings he had escaped from years ago were grabbing Joel’s arm and dragging him into the darkness. Still, the city sounds he had complained about a moment ago had given him a chance to distract himself. He had finally left the street and was walking along the sidewalk. Thinking it was time to go home, he looked at his wristwatch, but it wasn’t working. He waited for the green light at the corner of the sidewalk to cross the street. At that moment, he felt movement next to him. Taking advantage of the rain stopping, the old man was smoking a cigarette. He lifted his head slightly, freed his mouth from his coat, and called out to the man.

"Excuse me."

The man looked at him smugly.

"Can you tell me the time? Mine isn't working."

Without taking his eyes off Joel, the man took draws at cigarette , then tugged at the cuff of his jacket and glanced at the clock.

"11.00"

Joel thanked the sullen oldster anyway and wished him good night as he crossed the street after the light turned green.

He was walking on the bridge. Now there was no sound of an engine or a horn coming from a single place. Suddenly he felt like the city was going to swallow him and lifted his bowed head up, taking a deep breath. He saw a woman standing behind the banisters, watching the city view. His slow steps slowed down even more after seeing the woman and finally stopped. Unlike people, she had not escaped from the rain. Her hair that reached down to her shoulders was soaked, the strands of his hair stuck together. She had obviously experienced bigger things that was afraid of neither getting cold nor getting wet. She was wearing a denim jacket that would wear on a spring day, a pair of thin cotton sweatpants underneath, and a scarf wrapped awkwardly around his neck. The girl's body was shaking from the cold, but she didn't seem to feel it. As Joel moved closer to her, he realized she was crying. He wondered what she was thinking as he held on to the banister. Whatever her problem was, Joel wasn't going to leave her there alone. When he gently grabbed the woman's shoulder, she flinched in fear and looked at Joel.

"Madam, you shouldn't be here at this time of day in this weather. You'll catch a cold."

When the woman looked at him, he realized that she was tired of crying for a long time who stared at him blankly, not seeming to be afraid of the large man who had approached her.

"I'm sure, not where I'm supposed to be." she said and continued to look at the view. The girl's mysterious answer caught Joel's attention. Her hysterical look stood out to him. He felt that if they could combine these two unlucky worlds and be happy, they would understand each other.

He subconsciously wanted to show the girl that they were made for each other and imitated her and started looking at the view.

"You know, you're not the only one crushed under the chaotic progress of the city tonight." He said as she continued to look at the view, as if she didn't care what he said. "The only reason I live in this life is my daughter."

But she was not what she seemed, replied in a tone so weak that it was almost inaudible.

"Look, you see? One of us is much luckier." said her voice ready to cry.

Joel felt the girl's answer deep in his heart.

He turned her face and looked at her carefully. "Do you think you don't have this chance?" he thought as asked the question, that such a pure beauty shouldn't be this upset. This was unfair. Her cheeks shouldn't be stained with mascara that flowed with tears, her lips that were chapped from the tension of crying should be kissed by a man who loved her and made her smile.

As soon as the girl heard Joel's question, she turned towards him with her body. Although she pressed her lips together to keep from crying, her trembling chin gave herself away. She looked into Joel's eyes with pain until she swallowed her sobs. Even a little afraid. Her fear was trapped in the cruel arms of loneliness.

"What do you know about me that you can say such a thing?"

Joel nodded and replied, "You're right. I don't know you. But I'm looking into the eyes of a little girl who is tired of embracing her loneliness."

The girl let out a deep breath as she smiled faintly, as if relieved, and turned her head back to the view, breaking eye contact.

Joel patted the girl’s arm through the wet denim jacket. “It’s no coincidence that we met here tonight. Don't you really realize this?”

She frowned, her face contorted as if she were in pain, and she began to cry with all her might. Her sobs made it difficult for her to breathe and to utter the words she was trying to say.

"I'm so tired. There's no hope for me anymore."

If they had met at another time and under different circumstances, Joel was sure that he would have done everything in his power to prevent the young woman from becoming like this. The woman who had a beauty that would have been mentioned among the goddesses in ancient times was now nothing more than a slave trying to please despair and sadness. Only Joel's love could raise the girl's soul to enlightenment. He approached her softly and wrapped his arms around her body, holding her between his own.

"Shhh... I promise you," he said, his fingers caressing her hair tenderly. He pressed her head to his left breast. "Everything you've been through will be left behind."

The girl had lost so much faith that her long loneliness would ever end that when Joel embraced her with fatherly affection, her hysterical weeping flared up and she clung to him as sacredly as a little girl clings to her father. They stayed like that for a while, but she was shivering under his arms from the cold. Joel gently grabbed her arms around her waist and pulled them away from him.

Without thinking, Joel unzipped his coat, took it off, and draped it over the shoulders of the woman whose lips were purple from the cold. Her skinny body was lost in his coat. Joel stood next to her and lifted one arm up and wrapped it around her shoulder so that her body was now warmly pressed between his arm and chest and they started walking.

"Is your house near here?" he asked at first, but there was no answer from her. "I can't leave you alone in the middle of the night. If you tell me where you live, I'll take you there and you'll be safe."

She continued to cry. As they walked down the stairs, Joel tried to calm her down and told her not to cry, but she continued to cry as if she didn't hear him. As they walked down the steps, the girl sometimes talked to herself. Since Joel couldn't hear what she was saying, she couldn't get an answer when he asked what was wrong, but he didn't forget to hug her despite everything.

"You're not answering my questions. We can't stay out much longer, do you hear me? Or you'll get sick." Again there was no response from the girl. "Then I'll take you my home. At least you'll be warm and safe until morning."

"My God, what have you been through until get to this point?"

Joel's house was far away, and when they were halfway there, the woman's steps slowed down considerably. She had no strength left to walk, had already been tired both mentally and physically all day. She could not stand it any longer and told Joel in a pleading tone that she could not go any further. "Can't we stop for a while? Sit on a bench."

Joel looked around but saw that there were no benches. There was nowhere for them to sit and the girl was exhausted. He thought. It was late enough that taxis weren't going to pass very often on the road they were walking on. Joel looked for another solution. Maybe he could wait for the taxi to come, but he was suspicious of you.

"Hang on, honey. We've got ten minutes left," Joel said warmly. Then he placed one arm around her back and the other under legs, lifting her off the ground.

She put her hands around his neck. It was the closest them had been since they met. Their faces were inches apart, he could easily see your eyes, lips, nose, and eyebrows. He had never seen such beauty before. Neither sadness nor grief could hide the girl's beauty. He watched her face carefully to memorize every detail.

The girl's expression changed for a moment. She was crying silently. As if she was afraid he would notice. Joel wondered what was going on in her mind. She must have been in a lot of pain. He increased the strength in his arms and applied pressure to her back, then he brought her face closer to his and kissed her forehead in a sweet, innocent way.

"Okay, little lady, cry if it makes you feel better. I'm here for you, you're not alone, don't worry.

Joel felt tired after a few minutes. The night was cold, but his tiredness left him drenched in sweat. It became difficult to regulate his breathing rhythms. He thought he could have carried it more easily if it had been ten years ago, but he tried not to reflect his tiredness on the girl. He didn't want her to think she had left him in a difficult situation.

When they got home, Joel called out to her. "We're finally here. You can get off my lap." She nodded and got off his lap, looking around. It seemed like a quiet, friendly neighborhood. Considering the apartment building where she lived had a lot of drunken singing, prostitutes laughing, and a daily burglary, this was the kind of neighborhood she'd dreamed of. For the first time since they'd met, they started a topic of conversation. "It must be nice to live in a detached house."

Joel was also surprised, but his surprise turned to happiness. He smiled as he unlocked the door and looked at the young woman. "And we have friendly neighbors. I'm sure you'd love it here."

The young woman merely smiled mousy. As he returned his smile, Joel walked in, and so did the girl. But she was a little shy. Joel took her coat off of himself, hung it on the dresser, and turned to her as he walked inside.

"Hey, you can imagine this your home. Don't ask for permission for anything." The girl nodded and started following Joel. They were taking a little tour in the house. It was like she was going to live in this house now.

The man had already accepted her. He turned to the girl and put his hand on her waist and pulled her to his side so that she would not stand far away. "This is the living room, there is the kitchen over there. After you shower, your food will be ready, we will eat it here, you must be hungry." She could tell by her look how hungry she was.

He smiled and looked at her clothes with displeasure. "We can pick out some clothes that are too big for Sarah. Your clothes will be dry until morning."

The young woman watched the man as he climbed the stairs. He selected a new bathrobe and towel from the linen closet. She continued to watch him as he walked down the hall to the bathroom. As he talked about what she was going to do, she realized that good men could exist beyond fairy tales, and she reveled in that.

"Why are you helping me, someone you don't even know?"

The question was one Joel hadn’t expected. His movements slowed thoughtfully as he dropped the towels onto the chair next to the tub. “I told you. Nothing that happened tonight was by chance.” He straightened up and moved closer to her. “This was meant to happen,” he paused, his eyes fixated on the wall. “Besides, I was serious about you not being alone tonight.”

She didn't know what else to say to him other than 'thank you' as he left her alone in the bathroom to shower.

Joel went down to the kitchen and got the ingredients out of the refrigerator to prepare food and then got to work. He laughed to himself as he remembered the memory that came to his mind while chopping tomatoes on the board. Tommy's girlfriend, whom he had broken up with a week ago, was a strange woman. She was very interested in fortune telling and everyone believed in these ridiculous, made-up prophecies. When Joel invited them to a barbecue party one night and Tommy said that he had definite ideas about fortune telling, the woman insisted on telling him fortune. No matter how angry Joel was, Sarah and he managed to convince him in the end.

Tommy's ex ran over and brought the cards who spread them out on the table. Thus began the cartomancy nonsense. Joel chose the queen of hearts. Warmth, compassion, healing, unconditional love. Sooner or later, her lover's brother would meet a woman with whom he would have a healthy and balanced relationship. They would find in each other everything they lacked, and they would love themselves more in this relationship. Was it really necessary to believe in cartomancy? Maybe that crazy woman was right. Come on!

The sandwiches were ready and took their places on the table. As he poured fresh orange juice into the glasses, he began to hum the lyrics of the Mr. Sandman song that came to mind as a memory.

"Please turn on your magic beam

Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream"

But as he was leaving the glasses on the table, his song was interrupted by the movement he felt in front of the kitchen door. Out of the corner of his eye he saw it was her. She was wearing nothing but a towel covering her privates. Joel's lips were slightly parted, his face somewhere between shock and seriousness. The words were stuck in his throat. "You..." was all he could say.

The young woman put on a facial expression that showed how much she needed him and simply said, "Come, please." holding out her hand.

She released the towel that barely covered her and fell to the floor. Her smooth skin was now bright and shiny in the kitchen light. The perfect measure of her waist, her full breasts with nipples hardened by the cold, my God, she was a true goddess. Still, he thought to himself, to respond to her request would be to take advantage of her confusion and go against his moral sense.

Joel said with a sense of shame hidden behind his serious appearance, "I don't think that's right." He approached the young woman. He picked up the white towel that had fallen on the floor and held it over her to take it. But the girl touched Joel's cheek with an attitude that knew what she wanted and looked him in the eyes with certainty. "I thought about what you said and I realized that we would be good for each other. I need to sleep in the arms of a man like you tonight, if you want it too."

Joel swallowed. He was excited like a boy who was a novice. This was different, very different. He stood there, not knowing what to do, when the young woman suddenly pressed herself to his lips. With one hand, she squeezed his cheeks, causing his lips to part, so she slid her tongue under his tongue. Warm and moist. Rubbing it under and over his tongue, she created a slight tickling sensation.

Shee bit his lower lip, ran her tongue and teeth along his jawbone, and then she started biting his neck. This had felt wrong and foreign to him at first, but he had adapted very quickly. He wrapped his arms around her, picked her up, and with one hand he motioned for her to wrap her leg around his waist. Her feet had left the ground, and they continued to kiss wildly as Joel led her into the living room. Her hair was wet, and water droplets were following a path from her forehead to the corners of her eyes and then to her lips. The wet kiss made them even more passionate. Joel gently laid the young girl on the couch, and with quick movements, without taking his eyes off the girl, he began to take off his clothes. His dark green shirt and the black T-shirt he wore underneath. His bronze skin highlighted his masculine body lines, allowing the light to shine like gold on his muscles in the dim environment. Joel saw the admiration in the girl's eyes and leaned towards her smiling lips with much more enthusiasm. The man's skin was warm, as the woman's cold fingers touched his skin, he felt the lust in their touch deeply, he felt his cells coming back to life. His hands explored the young woman's flexible body lines. He caressed her breasts, squeezed them, and sucked her hardening nipples, leaving bites. When his lips found her neck again, his fingers moved down from her breasts to her belly, leaving tickling touches, and reached her hips and began to caress her legs. The drops of water flowing from her damp hair were wetting the girl's skin, its brightness creating an erotic appearance. As they looked into eyes, they were both out of breath and knew that they had committed the most sacred sin ever. According to Joel, this sin was love, and it was worth burning in hell for it. "Oh my god, you're the sexiest woman I've ever seen in my life," he said as he unbuckled his belt. The sound of his metal belt buckle was hitting the living room walls. The sound of his leather sliding against the denim fabric was quite inviting when he pulled the belt quickly. When he took off his pants, the strain visible in his boxers almost ripped the fabric. After peeling off the black fabric and getting rid of that, he held her ankles and spread her legs apart and entered between them, his rock-hard dick hitting her upper thighs and rubbing against her groin, finding her vulva. He was now applying pressure to her swollen outer lips. The love they felt for each other had spread from their souls to their bodies, causing spasms in their groins. The cold feeling left by the water combined with Joel’s warm tongue strokes created an indescribable sensitivity in her neck, breasts, and belly. You were touching each other in places no one had ever touched before. Now they had to go much further than making love. When her hand reached out and grasped Joel’s erect penis, they smiled at each other’s lips.

"You are so eager, lady, so ready to touch me." Biting her lower lip,

"So aren't you?" the girl asked.

"I'm always ready for you," he said, pressing the girl's flexible body even more onto the cushion and they continued kissing while the girl rubbed his dick.

He was moaning so seductively that as his hot breath touched her ear and the back of it, a shiver ran down her spine and covered her body, accompanying her moans as she closed her eyes and felt his voice more. She didn't even need to touch him now, for her to squirt.

Joel placed his calloused fingers on the woman's tiny waist and, with a force so hard that it hurt slightly, forced the girl to lie face down. She could feel the slight sting of thorns on her skin as her breasts were pressed against the furry fabric. She must have been allergic.

He pulled her wet hair from her back and found its place on the left side of her neck, biting her bare side and started rubbing his penis hard in her vagina. In this way, the extreme pleasure and pain she felt would balance each other.

Joel growled. "Oh, it feels so warm and wet!"

When his cock, which was getting harder as it rubbed against her vulva, restricted her movements, the young woman lifted her hips up with the help of her arms and, standing in doggy position, started to caress his cock and balls between the parts of her hips. Joel was shaking on his knees, leg muscles clenched, breathing shallow.

He didn't want to end things like this. He wanted to feel the girl from the inside. He held her ass tightly and stopped her. He took his veiny cock in his hand and placed it at the entrance to her vagina.

Before he entered her, Joel asked passionately, "You wanted my cock so bad, uh, honey?"

As soon as she answered, "Yes," Joel reached for her hair and grabbed her roughly, pulling her back. "No short answers! Tell me what you want me to do!"

"I want your thick cock , please!" she breathed.

"Atta girl!" He whispered with warm breath on her ears.

He pushed the head of his penis into her vagina and inserted it. Her vagina slowly expanded and her walls wrapped around his cock that was too thick for. She moaned in slight pain, but it was also very pleasurable. Joel finally pushed it all inside. Her vagina was stretched wider than ever. He started pumping with long, slow strokes. She hadn't had much experience with sex before, but it was obvious that he was the best.

"You tell me when to speed up, honey." He whispered. She began to respond to his movements in a synchronized manner.

His hands gripped her elbows tightly, pulling her body a little closer.

She moaned, "Now, fuck me faster now!"

He moved faster, thrusting his at least seven inch cock in and out rapidly. Wet sounds were made as her vagina met his cock. Joel bend over and pulled her closer, his hands still gripping her elbows. He placed his hand under her chin, forcing her eyes to look up at the ceiling, so that he could place her head in the crook of his neck. His thumb was gently caressing her cheek. He placed his lips somewhere between her jawbone and ear. A shiver ran down spine and into her groin.

Deep and guttural moans released from his mouth, "Why does your pussy feel so good!"

The girl used her vagina to squeeze Joel, driving him crazy. They were shaking every time that big hard tool entered her.

He growled with powerful deep thrusts "Do you like the feeling of a man's penis that you don't know, uh?"

The girl's voice sounded like she couldn't stand the pleasure any longer. "Yeah, I love the way you fuck me!"

While he was pumping his penis inside her over and over again, with the last pump he would take the young woman to the edge. She would reach the peak of pleasure. He could feel her pulse on the surface of his finger as he squeezed her neck under his hand while he was cumming inside her. As his seeds washed her cunt, the girl also had an orgasm and both of their pleasure juices flowed out of her vagina at the same time. The space between her legs was sticky and shiny. Drops of water were running down the insides of her upper thighs. As their breaths mingled, the young woman freed herself from Joel's grasp and threw herself onto the couch, lying on her back. Her chest was rising and falling. There was still an inviting look in the girl's eyes. Joel took advantage of this and collapsed on top of her, started to kiss her lips. His tongue was kissing her as if he was fucking her mouth now. As their passionate kiss slowly heated up, Joel's hands couldn't stop themselves from caressing her legs. But he didn't want to tire her out any further. They still hadn't eaten. He didn't want to drain her of all her energy, so he pulled his lips away from hers and leaned his face against her chest.The young woman put her fingers into his grey hair strands and started to mix it up slowly.

After they had rested, the girl asked, "Are you sure your daughter won't suddenly appear and catch us?"

Joel lifted himself up on his arms and looked down at the young woman. "She's staying with her uncle tonight. It's not possible. Are you hungry?"

She nodded, "I'm starving."

Joel stood up, picked up her , put her arms around him, looked at him with happy eyes, and he walked out of the living room and up the stairs. He took her to the bedroom. After cleaning the sperm and pre-cum leaking from her vagina, he left her alone in the room. He brought clothes from the bathroom and handed them to the girl. "After you get dressed, you can go down to the kitchen."

They were both silent as they ate. If she asked him a question about his life, she had to tell him either, and the same was true for Joel.

However, it was Joel who broke the silence."Why were you on the bridge? It didn't look like you were trying to commit suicide."

The girl was chewing the bite from the sandwich. That's why she couldn't pronounce the words properly. But Joel could see the sadness returning to her face.

""I just wanted to forget myself in the chaos of the city." Then she grinned insincerely, as if she had to smile. "Otherwise I'm too cowardly to commit suicide." Her voice trembled as she emphasized the last words, and averted her eyes.

Joel stroked her hair. "Shh... I'm with you now. I won't give you any reason to cry."

He put his arms on the table and leaned towards her slightly. "Really, we haven't officially met yet. I asked you your name when we were walking on the street, but you brushed it off."

The woman couldn't make an excuse, but she was nervous as she answered Joel's question, unlike him. He repeated her name over and over as they spoke. As if each time he said her name was a great reward. Joel liked the woman. The way she was young and beautiful, the way they had met, the way she enjoyed his conversation except when he was sad.

Joel called out to her, trying to start a new topic of conversation, but she was the first to respond. “Joel, I actually want to go to sleep. We’ve been through enough.”

Joel nodded in displeasure. But he was also trying to understand the girl's situation. He was being understanding. "Okay, you can go sleep wherever you want."

As she stood up, she patted Joel's arm and gave him a rather long kiss on the cheek. "Thank you for everything, Joel. I'll always remember that kindness."

After the girl left, Joel sat in the kitchen chair for a while longer, wondering if Sarah would like the young lady. Would their relationship crown itself with love, as the crazy Ex said?

Joel chuckled to himself. He was being ridiculous, really. A forgotten emotion had awakened and blossomed in his heart, exciting him and making him feel like a high school teenager. He put his teenage thoughts out of his mind and collected the dishes from the table and put them in the dishwasher. He still had a goofy smile on his face. It was a very difficult day for him too. All the negativity had piled up and he felt like life was suffocating him. However, this beautiful girl had entered his life like an angel and brought the light of heaven to his soul.

When Joel climbed the stairs and entered his room, he saw that the girl was already asleep in her bed. He lay down next to her without letting her wake up. When the girl mumbled something in her sleep, Joel thought she was talking, so he answered. But she was just mumbling. Names of people he didn't know, names he'd never heard in their conversations. His dream was to watch her until the morning, but the tiredness of the day took him captive too.

He was dreaming. It was the most peaceful dream he had had in a while. He felt proud, and he claimed to know. The Queen of Hearts had not failed him. She was right there beside him, bringing light into his life. What else could rich bourgeois girl mean? He was lucky now.

But this dream was cut short by the morning sun. The sky had just brightened. The biting cold of winter was chilling. That's why when he woke up, he had his arms clasped together. He had rubbed his eyes and looked to his left to realize his dream of wishing good morning to the woman he loved, whom he had missed for a long time. But she was not there. His eyebrows furrowed in curiosity. The side where the girl had slept last night was the window side and he saw something on the window pane that had been fogged up from the cold. He stood up, approached the window with heavy steps and stared at the writing written in the fog there.

"Goodbye."

[helplesslypurple77]

Day 14 -Shower Sex-Hisoka/Reader

Notes:  k so suspend your disbelief that Hisoka would ever need a roommate, that man is probably rich as hell, but this is my universe and I can do anything I want.

.....

Maybe your decision to get a roommate was a mistake. It had seemed like such a bright idea a few weeks ago, when you had put the last minute listing online. Because you could have a nice, large apartment in a central location and halve the price. And maybe you could make a nice friend out of it. You were even safe, requiring an online form as well as an in person interview. You weren't too worried though, you considered yourself pretty formidable when it came to ability. 

But it was not going as well as you would have liked. You have received plenty of submissions, sure. But each one had something glaringly wrong with it. You shuffle through the forms you had printed out, sighing as each one passes through your vision. These are the better ones, you threw out the worse ones already. Now, only three remain.

The first one is a woman, who after a delightful interview where the two of you got along really well, she had informed you that she had four cats and three dogs, and a cow. And she would expect them to live with her. So she was obviously tossed. The second one had been a rather mousy looking man who had some clear stalker tendencies, and had asked you to compromise on rent. You had told him maybe, and shooed him away. 

The last option was the one you were most hopeful about. It was another man, who was set to arrive any minute now. His answers on the form were promising, of course, but also very general. That was why you had set up the in person interview. To probe people and get their general vibes. 

The doorbell rings, shaking you out of your thoughts. You jump up, straightening your dress and fixing your hair, before moving to the door. This is the last one. You send up a little prayer, begging that this one will be the perfect candidate, and open the door.

The man standing on the other side of the door with his hand on his hip is very hot. It's the first thing you notice, followed very quickly by the odd way he dresses. But have met many a weird dresser in your day so you try not to judge. 

“Are you Mr Morrow?” You question, smiling up at him. He's very tall, looming over you a bit in your own doorway.

“Yes, I was informed you were in desperate need of a roommate,” The man says, offering a hand out in front of him. “You have such a lovely nen, dear.”

You take it, wincing slightly as he shakes it. He's a dramatic one. And probably a pro hunter, given the fact that he noticed your nen. And pointed it out at all. But that doesn't mean anything, not yet at least.  

“I am. Come on in.” You say, yanking your hand out of his tight, cold grip and opening the door wide. The man breezes past you, sauntering into your house with no hint of hesitancy or fear. He shows only blind confidence, accompanied by a smirk tossed over his shoulder. He must be very strong. Or just stupid. You don't know which is better. You sigh, leading him towards the living room where you have your little interview area set up. 

“Alright Mr Morrow, could you tell me why you want a roommate?” You ask, sitting down on the couch of the cozy little living room. He sits down opposite you, in one of the cushy armchairs and crosses one leg over the other. 

“Hisoka is fine,” he says, brushing a hair through his red hair, pushing it back farther. “And it seemed fun!”

You raise an eyebrow. So he's an odd one. 

“Not for a financial need or…” You say, trying to prompt him into a more in depth answer. His smiles, yellow eyes flickering between your face and the rest of the apartment, probably taking it in. It's a nice apartment, and in a central part of Yorknew city. That's partly why you were so desperate for it. 

“Oh no, of course not. I could pay for this entire place if I felt like it.” He laughs lightly, and you chuckle. Probably a bad sign, you muse as he continues. “It's just that the address of my other residence got out and I had the most annoying visitors at all hours of the day.”

You raise your eyebrow high, so high you assume it's going to disappear into your hairline at any moment, and tap your pen. Hisoka shakes his head, pouting slightly and you kick yourself as it occurs to you once again how attractive he really is. 

“It was so inconvenient, I'm sure you know darling. So I had to move.” Hisoka says with a frown, head tilting to the side. “But I soon discovered that I had been put on a no buy list. Like a no fly list? You understand?”

He leans forward, like he's telling some great secret, and you nod with a sigh. This one is a complicated one. No matter how attractive you find his arms as they flex, or his thin waist in that odd outfit he wears, you need to remain rational and not rush such an important decision because you thought this guy was hot as fuck. Hisoka smiles, somehow not disturbing the strange symbols painted on his cheeks. 

“So I figured getting a roomie was the solution to both problems!” He says with a smile, pointing his finger in the air as if he's come up with the solution to a great puzzling problem. “No weak people will figure out my address, as your name will be on the lease. And paying you the rent mitigates the no buy list issue.”

“I see, how interesting.” You say, trying not to sound too amused. He sure is a weird one, alright. “Do you have any pets?”

“Oh no, animals don't like me.” He laughs, passing his hand through his hair again. “I couldn't tell you why, will that be an issue?”

“Oh, no.” You say, a beat of worry ticking at the back of your brain. “I don't have any pets, they make a lot of mess.”

It should probably be a bad sign that animals don't like him, but honestly all you care about is the fact that he doesn't have a pet, not any flags as red as his hair that answer might raise. 

“And you wouldn't object to sharing a bathroom?” You question. The apartment is nice, but it's a two bedroom one bath. You didn't know why, an odd design choice on the part of the former owners. Hisoka chuckles.

“Oh, not at all~” He says silkily, recrossing his legs with a flourish. “I can coexist just fine with someone as lovely as you. I hear that taking showers together conserves water~”

He shoots you a wink, a smirk flashing across his face. You laugh, trying to ignore what he's laying down on the table. It's better not to think of anything like that, lest it urge you closer and closer to just giving up and taking him on as a roommate.

“How environmentally conscious,” You say, appropriately neutral as you continue. “And may I ask what you do for work?”

“Ah work. That's a little complicated, I'm afraid.” Hisoka says, tilting his head to the side with a bit of a frown. “I suppose officially, I would classify as a blacklist hunter.”

Ah, of course. You can't really say you're surprised, but perhaps it's a bad sign for your mental health that his answer doesn't actually put you off as much as it should.

“I see,” you say, noting that down on your little notebook. Hisoka tilts his head, eyes flickering curiously.

“You don't seem at all alarmed.” He questions, yellow eyes staring directly at your face. Not dancing around your face and body, not at the wall behind you. He must be very interested in your reaction.

“It's really none of my business, as long as you don't mess with the apartment,” You explain, running a hand through your hair. “And besides, I'm a hunter as well, and you don't seem to mean any harm to me. Right now anyway.”

Hisoka blinks, letting the silence stretch on for a moment, filling the air of the cozy living room. He seems a bit surprised by your answer, for reasons you can't understand. Maybe he was surprised by your total lack of fear? Or maybe your casual attitude. It was only natural, both your parents were hunters and most of your clientele were as well. You supposed you were a bit dead to what was normal and unusual. You did make specialty weapons for people all over the world. Some of your best clientele were the infamous Zoldyck family. You were kind of used to weirdos dressed in odd costumes who wanted strange things. The only thing you might need to worry about from Hisoka was how attractive you found him. 

Hisoka chuckles. 

“How interesting~” he purrs, breaking the silence that had fallen over the room. “What a strikingly brave person you are, doll.”

“I guess,” You say, shrugging off the pet name he’s already assigned you with a sigh. “Are there any questions you have for me? It's better to settle these things before you move in.”

“Ah, so you’ll have me then?” Hisoka asks, all smiles. You nod, shuffling your papers with a sigh. It seems he really is the best option. 

“Questions, hmm.” Hisoka says, tapping his chin. You wait patiently as he considers, a bit worried. Finally, he speaks. “I have an odd friend. You don't mind him showing up out of nowhere do you?”

You sigh. You've been doing a lot of sighing lately. 

“No, not really. Tell him my bedroom is off limits though.” You say, standing to your feet. You've known your share of weirdos, and as long as this one stays out of your private spaces you're fine. Hisoka smiles, rising smoothly to his feet with a slightly unhinged smile. He held out his hand, yet again. You eye it warily.

“So, we have a deal?” He asks, angling his hand upwards slightly, palm pointing into the ceiling. His nails are a bit long, you notice absentmindedly.

You reach out, taking his hand to shake. 

“Yes, for now.” You say, “But we still need to sign the papers.”

“Yes, of course.” Hisoka supplies, mouth curving into a smile as he grips your hand, bringing it up to his cold lips. You push down a flush, biting your lips as he presses a long kiss to the back of your hand. His yellow eyes flick up, meeting your own and pinning you to the spot. Finally, after what feels like an age, he stands up, gently releasing your hand from his chilly grip. It falls to your side, and you clear your throat.

“Would you like a tour?” You ask, proud of how clear your vocal cords remain. Hisoka chuckles, crossing his arms casually.

“Sure.” He laughs.

You fear for your future self. You’ve certainly found an odd roommate. 

⚀⚀⚀

Hisoka, despite the faults and red flags that constantly run in your vision, isn't actually that terrible of a roomate. He's quite clean, and not very noisy. He does cook at all, but you don't mind cooking for two and leaving leftovers for him as he comes and goes. In return, he cleans the kitchen for you, and often the rest of the house as well. The two of you end up not seeing each other as much as you would like, only meating for meals and the occasional free afternoon of dancing around each other. It's nice, honestly. You can ignore his other faults, like the makeup skin and hair products that are mixing with your own, and the incessant flirting. He flirts so much you assume it's just how he is. Because no matter how much you wanna fuck him, you doubt its returned. Because that's the other problem. You really wanna fuck him, and it can be reliably traced to a combination of a few things. 

One, because of your new roomie, you cant bring men home to fuck anymore. 

Two, He's just insanely attractive and touchy, a hand on your waist here, a brush of your neck there, and you're losing your mind.

And three, the walls are too thin for you to masturbate comfortably. You can only masturbate in the shower now. But that in itself is a problem. You try not to shower for too long because of the water bill and so you can only get yourself off way less than you need.

But it isn't really a big deal, you promise yourself. You don't find yourself spending long bouts of time with Hisoka anyway, so your obvious desire for him isn't on display. You can only hope you can hide it for as long as the two of your remaining roomies. 

⚀⚀⚀

You survey the counters of your bathroom, the white of the countertop slowly being swallowed by skincare. Your own skincare addiction was a beast, but with Hisoka living with you the problem had only worsened. The shelves were covered in various masks and serums, the cabinets taken up by painkillers and mysterious under the counter drugs. The shelves to the side of the counter are laden in your makeup, with a small space devoted to the few products Hisoka used to draw his star and teardrop. 

You shove a couple things aside to grab your hair brush. The mirror is clean, your reflection clear in the glass, a few little sticky notes stuck to one end. You eye them, your messy handwriting noting down the things you were running low on. It was better if you left them in the mirror. You looked at it every morning and night after all when you did your skincare. 

You sigh, running a brush over your scalp in relief. The shower isn't running yet, but you're excited for the opportunity to wash your hair, and of course, to masturbate. Your body is thrumming with pent up energy as you eye yourself in the mirror. Hisoka had been especially annoying this week. It seemed he had nothing to do, so every morning when you left for work you encountered him in the living room, and he was there when you returned. 

Sometimes he was on the couch, watching reality tv in a tank top and sweats, and sometimes he was clearly just coming from the gym with sweat gathering on his arms and face. Each time he was desperately tempting, and much too flirty for your sanity. Be it a wink and a flirty comment, or a brush of your waist and a breath on your neck. He was driving you crazy. 

You sigh, shedding the towel you had been wrapped in and fold it neatly, placing it on the small shelf next to the entrance of the shower. You dig your feet ingo the bathmat, running a hand through your hair with a sigh. And then you see it.

A spider. A nasty, giant spider the size of your palm, sitting directly in the shower. In the path of your feet.

You scream shrilly, jumping backwards dramatically as you run to get as far away from the spider as possible. You hate spiders, more than anything in the world. You scream again, your shrill voice echoing off the bathroom walls.

“Hisoka!” You shriek, hugging your naked waist in fear as the spider moves a few inches closer. “Come here!”

The door slams open, Hisoka moving with a sense of urgency. His face betrays no emotion besides amusement as he takes you in, shivering and naked, glaring at the spider on the shower floor.

“Can I help you doll?” he purrs, moving closer to you across the bathroom floor. You don't even notice, too busy with your worst enemy, the giant spider watching you from the shower. The shower in the bathroom is only covered with a slight wall of glass, leaving about a space wide enough for someone to pass through comfortably into the shower cubby. It's also enough space for the spider to escape and hunt you down relentlessly. 

“Don't you see it?” You hiss, body trembling in the chilly bathroom air. You shiver, holding your arms around your waist. You seem to have forgotten your nakedness. 

Hisoka chuckles, folding his hands across his chest as his yellow eyes scan your body, pausing on all the parts of interest. He licks his lips, moving towards you across the floor. You don't notice, too busy keeping an eye on the spider. 

“Look,” you whisper. “The spider. In the shower.”

“Ah,” Hisoka says, a slight laugh contained in his voice. “Afraid of spiders, are you?”

You roll your eyes, not happy with his sarcasm.

The spider jumps, moving out of the shower cubby and towards you on the floor. You shriek, jumping backwards and into Hisoka’s arms, clinging to his muscled body as you scream.

“Ugh, it's coming this way!” You yell, hiding your face in Hisoka’s chest as your legs clench around his waist. “Just kill it!”

Hisoka laughs, the sound rattling in his chest as you cling close to him. He has his phone in his pocket, poking against your thighs. It's odd, because you don't remember this pair of sweatpants he's wearing having pockets. The spider sits heavy on your mind though, and you grip his muscled shoulders close with a whimper.

“As you wish.” Hisoka laughs, gripping your thighs and holding your body close to him. Faintly, you inhale his scent, a mix of flowers and musk and the unmistakable faint scent of blood. It turns you on as fear runs through your blood. You hid your head in his chest.

“Is it dead?” You whisper, gripping him tightly. Your heart is beating fast against your chest, begging to escape and run away from the stupid spider. 

“Yes, doll.” Hisoka purrs, other hand coming up to stroke your hair gently, an attempt to calm you down. “Your knight in shining armor has rescued you from the great threat lurking in the depths of the shower.”

You roll your eyes. He's making fun of you.

“Did you throw it away?” You question, not loosening your death grip on his shoulders. 

“Yes, I'm delighted to report it’s out of your sight.” Hisoka says, a chuckle in his voice. You pull your head away from his chest cautiously, pearing backwards and scouring the bathroom floor for any remnants of the spider. The floor is empty, only occupied with the fluffy bath mat. You sigh in relief, your chest heavy distractingly against the black tank top Hisoka wears. 

Then you realize exactly where you are. You're clinging to Hisoka like a tree, completely naked and clutching at his body. You shriek again, almost as loud as you did when you saw that damn spider and fly away from him like you've touched fire. Hisoka chuckles.

“Aw, come back.” he coos, running a hand through his hair. “You were so cute, all helpless and scared.”

You frown and bite back a groan at the same time, covering your tits and pussy with your hands as best you can.

“Get out!” You shriek, fighting back the arousal that leaks in as you take him in. 

“How rude!” Hisoka chuckles, pulling his tank top over his head. “No thank you?”

You yank your eyes away from his pale chest, as your pussy twitches with arousal. He toys with the hem of his sweatpants. As he tugs them lower, and you take in the v line pointing lower and lower, you realize he's not wearing boxers. You yank your eyes away, but it's too late. He's seen your wandering eyes. 

“The water bill is getting too high.” You say out of nowhere, body tingling with arousal. 

HIsoka tilts his head, biting back a smirk.

“Is that so?” He smirks, voice lilting seductively. “You know, I've been told showering together conserves water.”

You bite back a smile. A callback to your very first conversation. You let your hands drop, as you move towards the shower. All pretense is gone, just two people who really wanna fuck each others brians out. You giggle.

“What a clever plan.” You say, stepping into the shower and turning on the water with a sigh. Hisoka crowds behind you, smirking like the cat that got the cream. You suppose that's an accurate description for what's happening right now. 

⚀⚀⚀

“How long have you known,” You whimper, boobs and face pressed against the glass divider. Hisoka chuckles, tick chock drilling your insides as you moan loudly. The steam of the shower floats through the air, obscuring his face slightly. His hair is down, dripping with water and plastered to his face, but he doesn't seem to care. You brace your hands against the glass as he grips his hips, hitting the spot inside you that has you seeing stars.

“Since your eyes first scanned my body,” Hisoka grunts, hands gripping you so tight you’ll bruise. “You aren't exactly subtle, doll.”

“Ah, how embarrassing.” you murmur, hair falling wet and heavy down your back, tangling in your mouth. 

“Don't be too upset about it,” Hisoka murmurs, pressing his back against you as he drills deeper into you. “Your lustful glances were very mutual. You're simply a bit romantically oblivious.”

You whimper, hands scrabbling at the slick glass. The bathroom is filled with steam, the sound of the shower muffling your moans and the slapping of wet skin. You hope your neighbors can't hear you. 

“Am i?” You whimper, head falling back as his steady thrusts bring you closer and closer to completion. “I thought you were just like that.”

“I am,” Hisoka mutters, sinking his teeth into your neck. You clench down on him, body tensing as pleasure and pain erupt from the bite mark, tangling and twisting into a heady cocktail of arousal. 

“Ah, god.” You moan, nipples rubbing against the glass. “We should have done this sooner.”

Hisoka’s clawed hand reaches down, abandoning your bruised hips to rub circles into your clit. Stars burst behind your eyes, the bubbles and steam of the ballroom only adding to the floaty, dream like atmosphere. Hisoka chuckles, body hard and powerful against your own soft, curvy one. 

“I think we'll be doing this a lot from now on.” He half chuckles, half groans, body pressing against yours, pressing you to the glass.

Your lips part as you cum, screaming his name into the abyss of hot steam and powerful muscles. And as the orgasms overwhelm your body, you smile to yourself against the glass.

It seems getting a roommate was shaping up to be the best decision you’d ever made. 

.....

Endnotes: my sister is terrified of spiders. I channeled her fear for the spider bit. I don't like spiders very much, but she's genuinely terrified lol.

Also, guess who finished this before one in the morning, instead of at like three. Im hella proud of myself for that <3

[pimosworld]

💌

Congratulations on 700 followers, yay!! And what a way to celebrate with the things you're offering!

I simply can't just *not* ask you... brat tamer Santiago Garcia, if you happen to be inspired?

Pairing- Santiago Garcia x F! Reader

Summary- You push your boyfriend just a little too far with your teasing

CW-18+, NSFW, MDNI, Brat tamer Santi, Sub reader, slight voyeurism, Overstimulation, Breath play, Rough sex, Safe word established, Use of restraints, gagging, Dacryphilia, Pet names, Unprotected PIV, Cream Pie, Aftercare

WK- 3.6K ( Drabble..who said this was a Drabble?)

A/N- This was the first ask in my follower celebration and I’ve wanted to put my all into it. Santi is so intimidating and I love writing for him.

Not beta read

Some inspiration before you read if you’re feeling so inclined. ( Santiago)

[Main Masterlist][Triple Frontier]

Cupid’s arrow

It started off innocently enough 

  Text image 

  Santi:Baby you’re killing me

         Just wanted to give you a Valentines preview 

  It was boredom that often got you in trouble with Santiago. He said you had a knack for testing his Will power. A constant push and pull between being good and watching the moment he decides he’s had enough of your behavior. 

  The problem here lies that you can’t see his face via text. There was no way of knowing when the flip switched from innocent to a lesson in never pushing Santiago’s buttons. 

  Text image 

  Santi:I’m serious I’m trying to work here cariño 

            Fine…tell Frankie I said hi

  It really was his fault…he left you to your own devices for an entire day. Of course you went shopping and saw the lacy red set that you know would drive him wild. The woman who helped you out convinced you to get a few more things and also another set in pink. But then you saw the black silk teddy with the red trim and you knew you just had to have that one. 

  A full photo shoot in the floor length mirror in your shared bedroom had you occupied for a little longer. And now you find yourself growing impatient as the time ticks on. 

  “Pope, my dog can hold a flashlight better than you.” Frankie’s muffled voice comes from under the sink as Santi discards his phone on the counter. 

  “Relajate hermano.” Santi’s annoyance oozed from his tone, mostly irritated at his lack of preparedness for what was supposed to be a simple ‘in fish’s words’ fix to his leaky sink. 

  One hour turned into four and it seemed like they had made way too many trips to the hardware store. This was clearly not going to be a quick fix and Frankie should’ve hired a plumber like he said. He knew Frankie was too stubborn for that, the pilot could fix mostly anything on his own and that sometimes led to an air of too much confidence. 

  Frankie leans back on his heels wiping the sweat from his brow with his shirt, the backwards standard oil cap on his head a shade darker around the rim because the man is too cheap to turn on the ac. 

  “Your dick hard from holding that flashlight or were you staring at my ass.” Frankie chides and Santi’s flipping him off before the words even leave his mouth. 

  Santi can’t help the way his body reacts to you. Which is why he desperately needed you to stop sending him those photos. He could be home with you right now, undressing you piece by piece. His face buried between your thighs as he pulled countless orgasms from you until you were begging him to stop. In reality he was going to do that anyway but he’s not going to be so nice about it now that you’ve decided to be a grade A pain in his ass. 

  You couldn’t possibly know that he’s at his wits end between Frankie’s constant ribbing and his one too many mentions of you. He appreciated that his friend cared about his love life but Santi knew how he really felt. The too long looks at you swimming at Wills in your bikini, the hugs that lasted longer than he’d felt comfortable with but wouldn’t dare say anything to Frankie. The way you genuinely laughed at his awful jokes when you were all hanging out at the bar. 

  “Let me take a look, I think your eyes need a break.” Santi bumps him out of the way with his foot. 

  “Oh you’re an expert plumber now, but you can’t even hold a damn flashlight.” Santi shoots him a look as he breathes heavy out of his nose and Frankie concedes taking the flashlight from him. 

  Santi’s grumbling in a mix of English and Spanish as he takes in the mangled mess of tubes and the puddle of questionable water his arm is sitting in. Santi is suddenly aware of every sore muscle in his body as his back goes rigid. His knees ache and his head is pounding from a lack of food and water. Right now he’s seeing red as he notices the problem they’ve been dealing with all day was quite literally because Frankie had his wires crossed. He's fumbling with the tubing as his phone buzzes in succinction on the counter above him. He thinks you might be calling him but it stops after three. 

  “Everything alright up there Fish?” His tone slightly exasperated as he’s plunged into darkness. Evidently neither of them know how to hold a flashlight properly. 

  “You are one lucky son of a bitch.” 

  “What!?” He groans after a loud thud that was his head hitting the underside of the sink reverberates through his body. 

  Frankie’s scrolling on Santi’s phone with a perverted look plastered on his face. He’s leaning against the counter completely unaware or unconcerned that Santi is staring daggers at him.

  Santi snatches his phone hastily. “Get a good look?” Frankie clearly can’t read the room as he chuckles at him and this is the closest he’s been to getting punched since basic training. 

  “I didn’t see much.” The lie is clear as day on his face as Santi crosses his arms. “I just don’t know how you could be here with me while you’ve got that at home.” Frankie crosses his arms almost mimicking Santi and an unfamiliar noise leaves his mouth. Santi probably resembles a fire breathing dragon more than a human at this moment. 

  “You’re right Frank.” He clenches and unclenches his fist. “I don’t know why I’m here.” He wonders now if Frankie was in on it with you and some elaborate plan to push him to the brink of his resolve. He wouldn’t put it past either of you, always vying for who can win the award for the first place pain in the ass. Unlucky for you and lucky for Frankie that his displaced aggression now has a direction. 

  Santi leaves the kitchen without another word, slamming the front door a little harder than he meant but not feeling too bad about it. He’s bounding toward his Jeep with his phone clutched in his hand and a painful bulge in his jeans. He decides not to leave Frankie entirely in the dark and also not wanting to have the day be a total waste. 

  I fixed the problem 

  🐈🐠: Gracias hermano te aprecio 

  Santi puts the car in reverse and starts the slow roll down the driveway. His phone buzzes next to him on the seat and he aggressively puts it back in park to check. 

  🐈🐠: Tell her to wear the red one 🥵

  Since when did his old ass figure out how to use emojis? Santi pulls up the messages he forgot you sent him. The ones Fish saw. The sweat trickles down his back as he takes in the compromising positions you’re in. One hand clutching your breast, another hand dipping beneath the deep red fabric. You’re only saving grace is that he can’t actually see that spot between your legs. The spot he knows is soaked and if Frankie had seen he’d never live it down. They’d have to share you at that point and Frankie would be none too pleased with himself. 

  Santi: Be in the bed with the red one on

  You were starting to get worried when you sent those last three images. You hadn’t heard from him and your anxiety was getting the best of you. You knew you were constantly pushing the limits of how far you could take him, with all the trust in your relationship you assumed at this point Santiago was limitless. Sending a few racy texts was nothing compared to making him come in his pants while you palmed him under the table at your last hang out with the guys. Your punishment was relatively mild when he yanked you into the bathroom and made you clean up the evidence. 

                   Can’t wait to see you baby 🥰

  You're waiting…patiently now after you’ve changed into the one that you knew would drive him crazy. 

  He’s driving, barely obeying the traffic laws as he white knuckles the steering wheel. He’d already picked out your tombstone when you sent the first photo. 

  Here lies my Beloved baby girl- impatient, petulant, brat until the very end 

  ****

  He knows he needs to shower first, so you’ll just have to wait a little longer. He hopes for your sake you’re in the bed like he asked. You had the expert ability to do the opposite of what he wanted at every turn. 

  The sun is just starting to set when he enters your shared home. He can smell his favorite scent wafting through the air of one of those ridiculous wax melts you had all throughout the house. He would never tell you that he liked it so much but it seems you’ve caught on anyway. He can’t even describe what it is since it’s labeled autumn air, but it reminds him of you.

  Had you been a little faster you might have gotten away with it…but he sees a flit of red and your foot just barely making it into the doorway of the bedroom.You’re lying on your stomach when he enters the room doing your best to not look out of breath with that innocent smile on your face. 

  “You think you’re slick?” You shake your head as he pulls his shirt off, revealing his tan skin. He throws it towards to hamper, missing it completely as he stalks towards you. He takes your jaw between his forefinger and thumb and you tilt your head up for a kiss that never comes. “I asked you a question.” His breath is hot on your face as you search his eyes for a sign of reassurance but you find none. 

  “I don’t…know what you’re talking about.” Your voice comes out shaky as his grip tightens on your chin. He laughs as an unmerciful look spreads across his face. You’re a mixture of terrified and aroused as you hang there in the balance, unsure of what his next move is. 

  He lets go of your chin and presses you back with his palm to lay against the headboard. His jaw is clenched and his lips in a tight line as he straddles your hips pinning you down with his jean clad thighs. You reach out to palm the obvious bulge in the front of his pants and he not so gently grabs your wrist. He places a soft kiss to the palm of your hand before bringing it up over your head to rest on the pillow. “That’s the last time you’re gonna act out of line.” His voice a low growl in your ear and you think you may have royally fucked up. 

  He sits back on his heels, trailing his hands over the soft fabric of your dress. His thumbs graze your nipple and his eyes go wide at the way your body reacts to him. He grips your hips and bunches the fabric to reveal the matching thing soaked with your arousal. If he had fangs he’d draw blood with the way he’s biting down on his lip as his fingers toy with the thin string, pulling it tight between your lips. He’s playing with you now and your antics earlier may have been seriously detrimental to your health and well being. 

  The material bites into your skin and you wince as he snaps the thin fabric like it’s made of floss. It’s vulgar the way he brings them to his nose inhaling your scent, his eyes roll back and your breath picks up at the carnal display before you. 

  He sets the torn panties down next to your head before his hands are back on you. “I take it, I bought this?” You nod once and he tsks under his breath. 

  “Yes.” It’s rushed out and he slaps the side of your thigh as he crowds your space. “I mean yes sir.” 

  “Good girl…I think it’s been too long since you’ve been taught a lesson.” You gasp as he rips the fabric. “You can’t even remember your manners.” Your gut churns at the voracious tone he’s using. The bold red dress flutters in front of you as he reduces it to shreds. His muscles flex as he pulls it taught, inspecting it to his liking. He leans over you, his soft kiss a stark contrast to his words. All you’ve wanted all day was to touch him, but you keep your hands where they are as his lips devour you. His kiss growing hungrier by the second. He pulls away breathless as he rests his head in the crook of your neck. He rolls his hips instinctively, his lust for you is almost too much. “You just need a little reminder sweetheart.” 

  He regained some composure as he pulled his weight back. The warmth of his body leaves you and goosebumps raise on your skin. His thumb grazes your bottom lip as he pulls down gently, coaxing your mouth open. He shoves your panties in your mouth and you can taste yourself on your tongue. You breathe deep through your nose as he waits for any sign you need this to stop. His hand grabs your wrist and the shredded fabric bringing it up to the bedpost. He was nothing if not tactical with his movements as he quickly secured both wrists with his perfectly procured gift. He gives a light tug and smirks, seemingly pleased with his work. 

  You squirm and whine as he swings his legs over your body and exits the bed. The drool starts down your cheek as you soak the fabric in your mouth. “Don’t worry cariño, I’m gonna take real good care of you.” 

  He opens the bedside drawer and fishes out your small pink vibrator, it’s been so long since you’ve used it you're not even sure it’s charged. He clicks it once and it roars to life…the opposing looks on your faces are almost cartoonish as you groan in anticipation. 

  He pulls his phone out of the front pocket of his jeans as he leans over dragging the tip through your slit. Not even bothering to look at the mess he’s making. “Let’s see… how many photos did you send baby?” The sarcasm drips off his tongue as he counts each one out loud. He whistles low under his breath. “Five…I’m not sure you can handle a five.” The settings go up to six and you’re praying to whatever god is listening that he has some mercy. 

  You keen as it breaches your entrance almost out of breath on the first setting. He clicks it twice more and snickers at your muffled cries. “I’m gonna shower okay sweetheart. You stay right there and don’t move.” He clinks his belt and pulls down his pants before heading towards the en-suite bathroom. He sends you one last salacious look as he palms himself over his boxers. You writhe as he turns his back to you, no doubt grinning like the Cheshire Cat. 

  ****

  You want to call him every name in the book besides his god given one as you breathe through your second climax. Your legs are shaking and you wish your pussy would go numb to the constant vibrating sensation wracking your body. You tried to crawl away from it to no avail, you clenched your thighs together hoping that would give you some relief and accidentally bumped it up a notch. 

  Your back arches off the bed as your wrists tug at the restraints, the new angle has it hitting that spot deep inside you as you bite down hard on the soaked fabric in your mouth. You’re almost grateful for it and you think he must know what he’s doing because you’d surely have cracked a molar at this point. 

  He’s humming some incessant tune as the water shuts off and you try and focus on your breathing knowing it’s almost over. 

  He exits the bathroom, steam emanating off his sturdy body. He used a towel to run through his thick hair not covering the hefty cock dangling between his thighs. He saunters over taking his sweet ass time, slowly pulling the vibrator from your soaked folds. A lewd sound comes out of you as he pulls the fabric from your mouth. He straddles your chest this time, careful to keep his weight off you as his cock sits heavy between your breasts. You know he’s doing it on purpose, as he unties your sore wrists. He knows how much you love sucking his cock that hangs inches from your face, but you wouldn’t dare do anything now without permission. You breath out heavily, mouth watering at the sight of him as he looks down upon you. His cock jumps at the temperature change and you know that he knows what you’re doing. Quite possibly the only thing you can do in your current predicament. 

  “You did so good for me cariño.” He slides down your body, trailing precum along your sweat soaked skin. He wipes the drool from your mouth with his hand and purses your lips in his grasp. “But we’re not done yet.” 

  “Santi please…I'm sorry.” You’re reduced to begging, something he rarely denied. 

  “I gave you a chance to be sorry.” He wipes a stray tear that rolls down your cheek and for a brief moment he feels bad. You were just trying to show off for him after all. The shredded reminder of your little outfit is all the motivation he needs to finish what he started. 

  You rub your sore wrists and stretch your limbs as he grabs his phone from the bedside table. You get a nice look of his pert ass as he walks to the opposing lounge chair in your bedroom and props the phone up to his liking. 

  “Hands and knees baby.” He’ll always love the way you quickly obey as he works his hand over his cock and climbs in the bed behind you. He’s sure you’ve learned your lesson but now he wanted to have some fun and you were being so good. 

  He soothes you with his other hand as he watches your shaky breaths from behind. Your ass wiggles a little as you try to get comfortable. He can see the arousal dripping down your thighs as he drags the tip through your soaked folds. “I can’t see your face baby, so keep your eyes open.” 

  “Yes sir.”

  “That’s my girl.” He pushes in as he grips your hips, starting a brutal pace. You’re so worked up from before as he drags in and out of your walls. Grunting behind you as the lewd sounds of the slap of skin echo in the room. He’s been so keyed up all day he knows he’s not going to last long and the way your pussy squeezes him so tight with every thrust he needs to feel you come before he loses all control. The chants of his name are like music to his ears as you grip the sheets below you, but it’s not good enough. 

  He wraps his arm around your chest bringing his hand to your throat as he breathes heavily into your ear. A sharp intake of breath as he squeezes slightly. “Your eyes open baby?” All you can do is nod and you hope that’s good enough. He releases it gripping your jaw to look at the camera while fucks relentlessly into you. “Whose fucking you like this…hmm.” 

  “You Santi.” Your voice cracks as you grasp at his arms to stay upright. He moans into your ear as you grip him tight. His breath on your neck tickles and you both chuckle slightly. A sighting of your Santi sprinkled into your intense moments. 

  “You tell him who you belong to.” Who? You whine as your body shakes, you’re just at the edge of the cliff all you need is that little push. He grips your hair with one hand bringing the other to rub your clit. “You know who.” He says through gritted teeth. 

  “I don’t I swear.” You sob, tears of ecstasy roll down your face as your fingers dig into his forearm. 

  “Frankie.” He growls in your ear as you fall apart in his arms. He follows you over the edge quickly after, much to your relief at the prospect of reaching your climax at the mention of his best friend. 

  It takes you both a moment to catch your breath, just basking in the afterglow. He kisses your shoulder asking if you’re okay. Turning your face to his when you don’t answer immediately, searching your face for any sign of discomfort. “I’m okay baby, I promise.” You sigh as he releases you, your tired body falling into the soft sheets below you. 

  He rubs your back for a moment before rolling out of bed to the bathroom. You have no idea what time it is, with the sun setting so early it could be six or nine and in the excitement of the day you didn’t eat or drink as much as you should have. Santi returns with a washcloth, wiping your face first and down your chest. He gently wipes both thighs and you shiver as he brushes the towel over that overworked spot between your legs. “I know it’s cold, I’m sorry.” His voice is low and calming like he’s approaching a frightened animal. The vulnerable and sweet Santi that you know and love talking you through the aftershocks. 

  He heads to the chair in the corner retrieving the phone you’d all but forgotten, sliding it in front of your face on the mattress. 

  “Why don’t you hit send for me cariño.” 

  🐈🐠: Message loading 

Here lies my Beloved baby girl- impatient, petulant, brat until the very end 

Comments and reblogs are much appreciated

Taglist- @for-a-longlongtime @legendary-pink-dot @goaways-stuff @criticalarchitecture @pedrit0-pascalit0 @charethcutestory02 @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction

[shinynewboots]

Hazbin Hotel Characters as Medical Specialties

Charlie: Pediatrics

You're telling me can't imagine Charlie with Bluey stickers in her pocket and saying "oh I see a dog in your ear. Woof!" When using an otoscope on a child with an ear infection? Be so for real rn

Vaggie: Emergency Medicine

This woman thrives in chaos, she grew up on a battefield. The ED is the Wild West of medicine and Vaggie thrives under the constant stress and variety

Vaggie: "what do you mean you were woodworking while drinking, are you fucking stupid"

Vox: Nephrology

Okay, okay this one is less based in personality and more based in the fact that I need to see a pissing competition between Vox and Alastor (as a cardiologist) about fluid status and renal function

Vox: *decreases lasix dosage in a patient with poor renal function*

Alastor: *punches Vox bc that patient is also fluid overloaded and has heart failure with a reduced ejection fraction*

Velvette: Dermatology

Listen you can't tell me that she didn't have amazing skin when she was alive. I can see her moving more towards the cosmetic side of dermatology with occasional biopsy or Mohs bc who doesn't love a procedure every once in a while

Cherri: ICU/Crit Care

Like Vaggie, Cherrie also thrives in chaos and things in the ICU can go from 0 to 100 in less than a minute. I also feel like she would have pretty good empathy and separation of work and home to be able to not let the job get to her too much

Angel: Psych

This just feels perfect to me, more based on my own experience but everyone I've met in Psych is kind while also being the coolest person you've ever met. I also think Angel would really be able to empathize with his patients based on his own history with addiction. He really likes to listen and offer support and advice.

Alastor: Cardiothoracic surgeon or Cardiologist (to get into a pissing contest with Vox about fluid and sodium)

Look, I know Al is like the perfect surgeon. He's intimidating, meticulous, and calculating. And I don't disagree, I think he would thrive as a CT surgeon...however, there's just something about him arguing with the nephrologist that just gives me the giggles

Lucifer: Internal Medicine

Listen, he's done it all and seen it all. He will spend hours rounding because he just wants to make sure he gets everything right (he's also avoiding going home alone but that's a different story). He also loves working with medical students and will give rousing lectures on first-line antihypertensive and diabetes medications (while also getting all of the students and residents names wrong).

Lute: OBGYN

Listen, I love Lute but if I knew her in real life she would intimidate me so badly. Much like the OBGYN attendings I worked with. She's amazing at her job and beloved by her patients for her blunt yet realistic recommendations, but in her L&D room or operating room, that is her domain and there is no deviation from that. Medical students and residents should exercise caution, but she will teach them the most out of any rotation

Adam: Orthopedics

This man is an ortho bro if I've ever see one. He is the attending who will pimp medical students on the playlist he has playing in the OR instead of the surgery in front of them. (What do you mean you don't know what artist this is? It's the fucking Eagles. Go home and study up, we're playing Led Zepplin tomorrow.)

Niffty: Pathology

Listen I have no explanations for this one. It just felt perfect, tbh

Husk: Anesthesia

This man is like every anesthesiologist I've ever met. He is there stereotype and sits behind the current with his sudoku in hand. Don't let that fool you, this man has knowledge and skill and is not afraid to use. The second your patient starts de-sating or coding, he's the one you wanna listen to

Rosie: Family Medicine

Rosie is the picture-perfect family medicine attending. Kind, empathetic and offers great advice. From cradle to grave, she's got you covered with primary prevention and screening and will be there for you for whatever comes next

Lol this is meant in good fun, so there are a few stereotypes about the different specialties and a lot of it is based on my own experiences on rotations. Let me know what you guys think. I know I missed some characters so let me know if y'all want me to come up with more.

[morning-star-joy]

the holidays linger like bad perfume

a stranger's heart without a home Chapter 2

Pairing: rivals to friends with benefits Joel x F!Reader, Post-Outbreak

Chapter Summary: Your first meeting with Joel and Ellie.

Chapter Warnings: Language, Brief References to Sexual Situations, Canon-Typical Violence (Raiders)

A/N: (lowkey chapter spoilers) Love to the game this chapter with a dam scene incorporated, if only for that bit where Ellie is recounting what happened to Joel and he's concerned and asks if she's hurt. Her voice when she says "no!!" always makes me laugh so I had to include it here.

Wordcount: 10.4k

chapter 1 || chapter 2 || chapter 3 || masterlist

ao3 link

Excited chatter and cheerful caroling surrounds you as you lean your head back, resting it on the top of your chair as you try to filter out the sounds in favor of the gentle strumming of the banjo beside you.

You didn’t hate the jolly atmosphere of Jackson around this time of year. Deep down a part of you knew these people needed that sense of normalcy, at least for morale if nothing else. But the animated atmosphere could be overwhelming at times. 

It was in these moments, when it all got to be too much, when you sought out the presence of Gustavo and his ever-present banjo. The older man never said much, preferring the solitary company of his instrument and the music he made with it. But he never complained whenever you sat beside him. He never asked you questions, and you never asked any of him as he kept playing his music.

A quiet whine catches your attention, followed by a nudge to your knee. Your eyes open to glance down at the black and white dog looking up at you, a tennis ball in his mouth.

“Alright, Buckley,” you murmur as you pull the ball out, smiling fondly at the dog’s excited bark while you look for a clear spot to throw it. Once you find one you chuck it, laughing softly as Buckley chases after it with more excited barking.

Moments like this, it was almost easy to convince yourself you had found some sort of peace. Ignorance was bliss, and surrounded by the walls of Jackson, that ignorance came to you easier. Easier to forget the horrors you escaped, as well as those you had committed. Over time, with memories muddled and lines blurring, it was hard to tell which had happened more often; if you had been the victim more, or the culprit. 

Buckley returned with the ball, dropping it at your feet with a happy wag of his tail. You sighed fondly, leaning down to pick it up and throw it for him to chase again. Buckley's presence also helped you when you felt overwhelmed. The simplicity of the dog's happiness as he played was calming to you, and you were glad he could usually be found around Gustavo.

This time when Buckley brought the ball back, he didn’t drop it at your feet, but in the path of an unsuspecting girl walking in front of you.

You watched as he spun in place before barking up at the short, brown-haired teenager, who laughed and bent down to scratch him between his ears. Leaning forward to rest your arms on your knees, you looked from the girl you had seen arrive with Joel up to where Maria stood behind her. You offered a respectful nod in greeting to the woman, which she returned.

“It looks like he likes you,” you smiled as the kid looked up at you, a bright smile on her face from petting the dog that turned more tentative, more cautious, when she made eye contact with you.

“Your dog’s cute,” she said, looking down at the dog with another grin and giggle as he sniffed at her face. “What’s his name?”

“Buckley,” you answer, smiling as the dog looks back at you, head cocked in confusion at the sound of his name. “But he’s not my dog. He kind of belongs to everyone.”

“Ah,” the girl nodded, a look of understanding crossing her brown eyes, sharp with cleverness and a hint of mischief. “Communism.”

Your brows furrowed, glancing from her back up to Maria. The woman bit her lip like she was holding back a laugh, but offered no explanation as you looked back down at the teenager. 

“Sure,” you said slowly, your hand coming down to pet Buckley out of instinct when he came trotting back to you.

Your head tilted as you watched the girl rise to her feet, trying to find similar features between her and Joel, or even Tommy. From a glance, her face seemed softer than the sharp angles of the Miller brothers. Both men had strong noses, but the girl’s nose was smaller. The only physical similarity you could see was the color of their hair and eyes, but the brown of the teenager’s was lighter than the brothers. From the mannerisms you had witnessed so far, though, she and Joel seemed to be one in the same.

Lost in your own thoughts, you hardly registered your hand extending to her, offering a shake as your name left your lips.

The girl stared blankly at you.

“If we’re introducing ourselves,” you added with a shrug, watching recognition light up in her eyes now at your offered hand.

“Oh, uh,” she nodded as her smaller hand shook with yours, “Ellie.”

“Welcome to Jackson, Ellie,” you say with a kind smile you usually reserved for Dina. “Are you and Joel planning to stay for a while?”

Ellie blinked, a look of surprise crossing her face, and you realized that in her mind, there should have been no way for you to know Joel’s name. Maria spoke up now, explaining to Ellie that you and Tommy knew each other, having fought in the Fireflies together before you ended up in Jackson.

You winced at that, both the dropped fact that you had been in the Fireflies, as well as the renewed interest Ellie looked at you with when she heard that new information.

“You were in the Fireflies?” she asked in a rush, and you found it hard to shut down her excitement, even if you had to force your smile this time.

“For a while, yeah,” you nodded, hoping the topic would change soon, but it looked like Ellie had sunken her teeth into this change in the conversation and wouldn’t let go until she got whatever information she wanted out of it.

“Do you know where they are now?”

“Well,” you started as you shifted uncomfortably, “they tend to move around a bit.”

“But like, what about a base, or something? You would know about that, right?” Her gaze was intense as she leaned forward, and you wondered what the reason for her fixation on the Fireflies was. It seemed to be beyond a simple childlike wonder for freedom fighters.

Freedom fighters, you thought bitterly to yourself. Your gaze flashed to Maria as the woman stepped forward, placing a hand on Ellie’s shoulder.

“Come on, Ellie, we’re going to miss the start of the movies if we stall any longer.”

“But—”

“Any answers you need, Ellie, I’m sure Tommy is telling Joel,” you offered with a small smile. You got the feeling that this girl was tenacious enough not to move an inch until she got what she wanted.

Ellie sighed, deflating as she nodded at you. She gave a small wave of farewell before leaving with Maria, a wave you returned amiably before leaning back in your chair.

Eyes closed, you tilt your head back again as you hear Gustavo’s raspy chuckle beside you.

“That girl’s a spitfire,” he muttered, and you laughed quietly.

She was, and it was admirable. You could only hope that this cruel world wouldn’t snuff that fire out.

You began to fall into the peaceful ambience of the banjo music again, content to let the sound drown out the children singing around the tree decorating nearby, until a loud bang made you jolt. Head jerking towards the sound, you searched for the source to find a man exiting a building in a hurry, a few doors down from where you were sitting.

That surge of anxiety you felt at the sudden, sharp noise began to ebb, your muscles relaxing from the immediate strain they had tensed into in case you had needed to spring into action. Old instincts were hard to shake off, even in the safety of Jackson.

You watched as the man—Joel, you realized—pulled his jacket on as he stalked off. He didn’t make it very far before grabbing an old, frosty streetlight to lean against, and you frowned.

There was no way to see his face from where you were behind him, but the way he leaned so heavily against the freezing pole for support caused an inkling of concern to grow in you. You pushed yourself slowly to your feet, moving towards the man before you could think twice about what you were doing. 

If he was anything like Tommy—which he seemed to be, though ten times more severe and lacking all the Southern charm—he liked his privacy. Not to mention Joel lacked any knowledge or fondness of you that Tommy had, the only thing that could soften a hard reaction to the foolish attempt at comfort you were about to make.

Still, you couldn’t find it in yourself to stand by as Joel seemed to be struggling to stay upright. As you were making your way towards him, you saw him turn and stumble a few steps closer towards the tree decorating. He seemed to be pulled towards it as if by some magnetic force, and you stopped.

You turned your gaze out over the crowd of family and friends that had gathered to celebrate the holiday tradition, but there were too many people to tell exactly where his gaze had fallen. It was impossible to tell what kind of look was on his face from where you stood a distance behind him, but you wondered if he felt in any way similar to how you did about being around these kinds of gatherings. The twinge of sympathy you felt at that thought spurred you forward again.

“Hey,” you tried to keep your voice soft as your hand landed on his shoulder. Not soft enough, judging by how he jumped back from the touch and spun around to face you.

Whatever look of alarm that might have been on his face hardened in an instant, dark gaze flickering over your face as his eyes squinted to take you in. You wondered briefly if he recognized you from the food hall, but surely there were so many new faces surrounding him today that he couldn’t tell you apart from the rest of them.

“What?” His voice was gruff as he watched you warily. Somehow, he managed to make the single word sound confrontational, while also holding the power to shut down any argument that may arise.

“Just—” you hedged, hands shoved in your pockets as you leaned back on the balls of your feet because, Jesus, he was intimidating. Way more than Tommy ever was towards you when you met him. “I just wanted to make sure you were alright.”

Joel’s brows furrowed, his expression turning from suspicion to mild confusion, though his eyes remained carefully guarded. He watched you silently for a moment, as if he was waiting for the catch. His voice was no softer than before when he finally asked bluntly, “Who are you to care?”

A short laugh leaves your lips unbidden, a sound of disbelief as you raise your eyebrows back at him. You were Tommy’s friend, so of course you cared—not that he knew that, but still. Even if you were just a stranger—which you were, some small voice in the back of your head reminded yourself—was it so odd to try and help somebody who looked like they were struggling?

Yes, that cynical voice in the back of your mind answered your own question. It was strange. Life was different in Jackson than the other places you had been to in this desolated country. You knew that from your own experience, but you also didn’t know the shit Joel had gone through just to get here, let alone what he had experienced before that. 

Joel was much older than you, probably remembering what he lost in the Outbreak more vividly than you did. He might have had to deal with even greater atrocities than you.

No, that wasn’t a maybe. He most certainly did. You were still a child during the first years of the Outbreak, but Joel was already an adult. He had a life, a sense of normalcy that he must have lost. Tommy did too, but from what little you knew, Joel seemed to have felt some kind of responsibility for his younger brother. You could sympathize with the weight of that responsibility.

Still, Joel had led his brother down a path of banditry and smuggling that you knew haunted Tommy to this day. But you also knew Tommy understood the reasons behind what they did, as did you. Morality could be swayed in this godforsaken land. Survival was non-negotiable.

But the way Joel looked at you now, like you were nothing but a nuisance—a stain on his shirt that wouldn't come off, or some annoying bug that had gotten squashed under his shoe—made you forget your sympathies momentarily as your hackles rose.

“Does the kindness of a stranger mean nothing to you?” you shot back, the comeback weak as you didn’t even believe the sentiment yourself.

“Not really." The deep baritone of Joel's voice made the Southern accent sound rougher around the edges than Tommy's. It was still a smooth drawl, serving as a sharp contrast to the harsh words he spoke.

His words should have made you angrier, if not for his borderline condescending tone, but any anger you felt began to loosen its tight grip as you watched him.

If you looked closely enough, you could see two lifetimes in Joel Miller's eyes. One was hidden far behind the other, but you could feel the impact of both; how heavy they must weigh on his shoulders, just in the way he carried himself. If what little you knew through Tommy of their harsh survival after the Outbreak was any indication, you couldn't imagine how weary Joel might be. He hid any faults well under his foreboding exterior, but you had seen that brief slip-up after he had walked out of the bar, the only indication you had so far that Joel was as human as the rest of you. This fact alone is what gave you pause in your anger.

“Yeah,” you assent as you reach a hand up to scratch absentmindedly at your cheek. Some of the sense of fight he had somehow drawn out of you was deflating at your line of thoughts. “I can’t really fault you there.”

Silence fell. You waited for the sound of crunching snow as he walked away, but when you looked back up, Joel was still there. Still standing stiffly, staring at you with that same guarded, inscrutable expression.

“What?” you snapped, the fight instinct flaring back up at the veiled judgement in his gaze. While his face was unreadable, you were almost certain he was reading yours. 

The most frustrating thing about it was that you didn’t know what he was reading. You didn’t know what words from the pages of your life reflected on your own skin; what pain lurked in your eyes, what trauma was etched into the lines of your face, as real and palpable as the calluses on your fingers or the scars on your body. You didn’t know what parts of yourself you should be hiding from his harsh judgment.

Joel shook his head, his expression shifting from wary calculation into cold indifference as he leaned away from you.

“Maybe you shouldn’t poke your nose into other people’s business,” he shot back over his shoulder after he turned, the words biting in how rude they were, and you bristled.

Okay, maybe he did recognize you from the food hall. Maybe he had even heard your scoff as you walked away, a judgment you made only by the briefest hint of distaste in his scathing remark.

Or maybe that was just how Joel sounded towards everybody, but you couldn’t help but take it personally as you automatically followed his footsteps away from you.

“Hey!” you called out, not sure what you were going to say, but you were unwilling to let him get the last word; either from some stupid sense of pride this godforsaken world hadn't stamped out, or from tenacity that had helped you last this long.

Joel paused, shoulders tensing before slowly looking back at you, almost as if the action was pulled from him against his own will. His eyes now held a hint of growing animosity, and you got the feeling that you were starting to walk down a very dangerous path. Being the subject of Joel Miller’s ire was probably a very, very bad place to be; you suspected the life expectancy was drastically short.

That didn't stop your mouth opening to snap back at him, despite your best intentions or better judgment. You were unsure what words were about to come out, only that they wouldn’t be any kinder than his, when a series of loud pops cut you off.

You turned away with a start as the strands of lights stretching above the town blinked out, followed closely by the lights on the large tree being decorated, startling the families surrounding it into shouts. Sudden darkness plunged down the buildings that lined the street, and you tensed.

A frown formed on your face, mind moving quickly as you looked from Joel back towards the building he had exited from. There was most likely only one person he would have been with; the very person you needed to find, if your suspicions were true.

Casting one last look at Joel, you moved towards the now dark bar, reaching the door at the same time it opened and Tommy walked out. He called out your name when he saw you, his face one of concern.

“How bad?” he asked, not bothering to question how you had known to find him there, details like that not important now as you fell into step beside him.

“Looks like it’s at least the whole street,” you reply with a gesture of your hand towards the rows of dark buildings that residents were beginning to exit from, flooding into the street in confusion. “I don’t know about the houses. Do you think there’s trouble at the dam again?”

Tommy tugged his gloves on as he kept your conversation in low tones, “Didn’t Bonnie and Greg just do a sweep of that area today?”

“Yeah, well,” you frowned, glancing back over your shoulder at where Joel was standing to see that he hadn’t moved, and was now watching the two of you closely. Gesturing towards Joel with a jerk of your chin, you finished shortly, “maybe they were a bit distracted.”

Tommy looked from you to his brother, hands bunching up into fists as he muttered, “Shit.”

“Trouble?” Joel echoed your earlier word choice, and you winced as you realized he had heard. That was on you, you should’ve been quieter.

There was a strange look that passed between the brothers, a palpable tension in the air that you couldn’t help but lean away from. Just what the fuck had happened between the two in that bar before Joel had stormed out?

“Maybe,” Tommy assented, glancing around at the residents who had started to drift over to where he stood. One of the downsides of being a figurehead of the community, you supposed. But Tommy smiled easily, showing he had earned that position as he laid that Southern charm on thick to address them, “Nothing to worry about, folks. It's probably just a generator that blew. We’ll take care of it shortly.”

You watched how easily satisfied most of the people were at the simple explanation before you followed Tommy’s steps down the street, ready to take orders. Old habits die hard, you guess.

“Get together a group of our best guards and a few engineers. I want you beside me,” he added with a firm pat to your shoulder. The action was not without fondness, even though it held a familiar gravity when accompanied with his orders, and you nodded seriously.

“Always,” you answered without hesitation.

You were about to break off from the man to go about your tasks when you heard a deep voice, one that was already growing annoyingly familiar, call from behind you, “I’m going with you.”

Both you and Tommy looked back to see Joel, gaze determined with something unreadable behind those dark brown eyes as he glanced between the two of you.

“Joel—”

“I’m going,” Joel repeated, his eyes hardening as much as his voice did within an instant, that unreadable look disappearing in favor of sheer determination. His tone was resolute, leaving no room for argument.

Tommy sighed beside you, pinching the bridge of his nose as if trying to keep a headache away. You looked between the two, knowing you should butt out of their business—not to mention that you weren't exactly fond of Tommy's older brother right at this moment—but if Joel had half the talent Tommy did, you would both be fools to turn down his assistance.

“If what little I know is true,” you caught both men’s attention as you spoke, “we could use a man like him, Tommy.”

You shrugged at the half-glare Tommy fixes you with. Whatever argument they may have had be damned, you wouldn’t let your friend be an idiot and turn down good help. 

“Just in case,” you added, and Tommy sighed heavily, staring at you for a moment longer before glancing back at his brother.

“Fine,” he bit the word out before looking back at you. “You stay with him, then. I’ll round up the troops.”

“Tommy—” you started, but he waved off anything you had to say before stomping away.

Jesus, what the fuck had gone down between the two of them?

You turned back to see Joel looking at you again, gaze still closed off, but not as borderline aggressive as before. There was still caution in the way he regarded you, perhaps even more so now that he had seen you and Tommy interact with each other.

Walking backwards, you nodded for him to follow you before turning and making your way towards the armory. Whatever dislike you felt growing for him, you had a job to do now. You were a professional, and your natural protective instinct wouldn't let either of you go in unprepared.

“Just in case, what?” Joel quoted your words as he easily fell into step beside you. “Trouble?”

You glare at him as he tosses your ambiguous word choice back in your face again. From one glance around you at the Jackson residents in the streets, you could tell the air of holiday cheer had been dampened by a new sense of worry. It wasn’t the first time power had gone out, but it never failed to blanket the settlement with a sense of unease whenever it happened.

Once you cut through a narrow space between two buildings, a shortcut to your destination that ensured you wouldn’t be overheard, you finally answered Joel, “Sometimes, it’s as simple as a blown fuse. Easy fix, usually doesn’t require more than a few men. But sometimes…”

You looked back at Joel, watching the rapid calculation in his eyes as he put the pieces together.

“Maria mentioned raiders. It didn’t sound like you got too many, though.” He arched an unconvinced eyebrow at you, something in his eyes daring you to defy his statement. Your stomach flipped at the sight and you quickly looked away. “According to her.”

“Yeah, because we don’t,” you snapped back, rising to that bait you had seen in his gaze despite knowing it would be in your best interest to let it go. You cleared your throat, pushing the intense, fluttering sensation you had felt when he raised his brow out of your mind as you neared the building that housed your weapons. 

“Not really. We have established patrols to make sure we deal with any problem before it arises. There’s been a few issues with attacks on the dam in the past, but it’s rare. Most of the time it’s just technical issues; old equipment and whatnot. Still…” You shrugged as your words trailed off.

Apparently Joel picked up on what you left unsaid as he finished simply for you, “You’d rather not take that chance.”

He didn’t say again, but you could hear the silent question hanging in the air, to which you gave a short nod of confirmation.

“Yeah,” you said quietly, and that was the end of that conversation.

You sent a brisk, though not unkind greeting towards the guards stationed outside the armory when you arrived, making it clear that Joel was with you before opening the door. You left it open, letting the light of the winter day guide your way with the lack of power, beelining towards where you kept your weapon trunk.

Kneeling down, you quickly tug one of your gloves off with your teeth, ignoring Joel’s sharp gaze as you let it fall to the ground so you could enter the combination on the lock and pop the top of the trunk open. You reached into the container, pulling out your beloved bolt action rifle.

Glancing over it, you checked the cartridge, scope and extra ammo, making sure everything was in order before swinging the strap over your shoulder and looking up at Joel to see he was still watching you, brown eyes unreadable again.

“Not as powerful as Tommy’s, but it gets the job done,” you remark with a shrug, taking out your pistol and holster to go through similar steps of care. Satisfied after a moment of inspection, you strap it to your hip before looking back into the trunk, eyes settling on a double barrel shotgun in the back.

It should have been gathering dust from misuse, but you never missed a chance to keep at least the outside polished along with the rest of your weapons. You hesitated, stomach twisting as you searched for another weapon to supply Joel with, but from just a glance at him, you could tell he needed something heavy-hitting, and those types of weapons were missing from your arsenal.

Except for that shotgun.

Maybe you could borrow somebody else’s? You shook your head, knowing that while most everything was shared in Jackson, guns like that were something sacred. Weapons like that shotgun had a story, something you didn’t share with others unless your survival counted on it. And maybe Joel's life would depend on it, a thought that steeled your resolve as you grabbed the gun. Besides, you didn’t have the time to work out a trade, even if you could.

“Are you any good with a shotgun, Miller?” you asked as you stood, not giving Joel a moment to respond before you tossed the gun to him.

He easily caught it, quickly releasing the action to check the chambers in one smooth motion, even with his gloves on. That same feeling you shook off from earlier curled in your gut again, and you convinced yourself it was nerves from seeing somebody hold the gun after so long. Definitely not in the way he held it, you told yourself as you cleared your throat, watching him inspect the shotgun thoroughly.

Joel snapped it back into place before looking up at you.

“Are you?” he asked, and you blinked, dumbfounded at how discourteous the statement was. Your face must have looked as affronted as you felt, since he lifted the gun in his hands and added, “It hardly looks used.”

You let out a soft breath, kneeling down again to dig out another handgun for him, conveniently hiding your face and whatever expression may betray your thoughts as you did so.

“Yeah, not for a while,” you admitted as you straightened again with a revolver. “I prefer long range.”

Not a lie, but he didn’t need to know the story.

Quickly checking the chambers of the revolver, you closed the cylinder before holding it out by the barrel, offering it for Joel to take by the grip. “You look like a revolver man.”

He pulled off a glove before his hand wrapped around it, taking it from you as you struggled to look away from the way his large hand completely enveloped the grip. Joel rechecked the cylinder, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to be offended by the action. Doubting others probably helped him survive this long.

“Did the accent give it away?” His voice was low, but it held a hint of dry humor to it. Maybe it was at your expense, or maybe you were even imagining it. Still, you couldn’t hold in your short burst of laughter. Joel looked up at the sound, the faintest hint of surprise flashing across his stoic features.

“Just a bit,” you smirked, grabbing some spare ammo and holsters for the both of you, carefully ignoring the weight of his gaze that you could feel honed in on you.

You didn’t look back up until you felt his attention finally shift away.

Once you were both properly armed and your trunk was safely locked up again, you led the way out of the armory and back to the stables. Joel’s presence was heavy at your side, urging your attention, but you forced yourself to ignore it by staring stubbornly ahead.

Yes, you were curious about the man. Probably more than you should be, especially after how uncivil your interactions had been so far. It was hard to curb that curiosity, after finally being able to put a face to the name you had only ever heard from Tommy for so long. That tension between you was palpable though, so you tried to forget your own spark of interest in the gruff man by avoiding his gaze. 

It was strange, knowing who Joel was through association alone. Even though he now walked beside you, armed with your own weapons, he was no better than a complete stranger, with nothing but one common thread tying you together: Tommy.

Joel seemed to have a similar train of thought, given by the question that finally broke through the tension that had continued to grow between you as you walked through the bitter winter air, “So how do you know Tommy?”

You bit back a sigh, glancing out of the corner of your eye at him to see that he was still staring straight ahead, almost as if he was purposefully avoiding looking at you too.

For a moment you wondered how much you should tell him. It would be easy to lie and say you met Tommy in Jackson, but you had seen the hints of keen analysis in Joel's eyes as he regarded you. Not to mention he had already seen you interact with Tommy. If he was as smart as you were giving him credit for, he could probably tell there was history you had with his brother that went beyond the secure walls of Jackson.

Besides, there was no real reason to not tell at least a partial truth. There was no justification in distrusting Joel. It was doubtful he would hurt you; not in Tommy’s town, and not with that kid in his care.

Hopefully.

“He helped me get out of Seattle when things started to go bad there,” you say with a small shrug. “I stuck with him after that. Didn’t see a reason not to.”

There was no indication from Joel that he was listening to your explanation, the sound of your voice met only with a long stretch of silence. 

Your eye twitched as you turned to look at him, planning to give him a piece of your mind for asking a personal question and not even having the decency to reply when you gave him an answer. 

The intensity of Joel's eyes stopped you short, and you realized he had been looking directly at you, maybe had been during the whole time you were talking.

An odd feeling of…something passed between the two of you in that instant. You refused to be the first to back down from whatever it was, taking that charge you could feel sparking in the air as a challenge. Courage flared in you, and you raised your brow as you dared him to break the silence this time.

Joel finally looked away, jaw ticking as he squinted ahead of you.

That tense air in the space that separated him from you grew thicker.

“I heard about that back in the Boston QZ,” Joel finally broke the strained stretch of silence that had grown taut between you, almost uncomfortably so, as he adjusted the strap of the shotgun across his chest. His voice was rough, a spark of electricity shooting down your spine at the sound, before he cleared his throat. “There was some kind of rebellion against FEDRA there, right?”

You were surprised at his attempt to continue the conversation. Especially after that weird, indefinable moment you just shared, but you nodded slowly as your mind began to turn away from him at the question.

Seattle felt so distant now. So much had changed since then, but there were bits and pieces you could remember from your life in Seattle as clearly as ever, even if you tried to forget.

Which you had.

“Yeah, the Washington Liberation Front," you said slowly, gaze cast downward under the weight of your memories and the regret that tainted them. "I’m surprised you heard about it all the way in Boston.”

“News of freedom fighters tends to travel far,” Joel murmured, distaste coating the words. You glanced sideways at him, wondering what caused his sour expression and bitter words.

“Yeah, freedom,” you shake your head with a quiet, bitter laugh. Spite coursed through your veins as more memories began to flash through your mind. Unwanted, but you were helpless to stop the downward spiral of moments past. You grabbed the strap of your rifle on your shoulder as a lifeline, your only defense from the barrage of memories of your life before. “Kind of funny, jumping from one rebellion to the next. What a bunch of fucking bullshit.”

The last words were more of an angry mumble to yourself than Joel, so you were startled when he spoke again, “You were a Firefly, then?”

Every muscle in your body tensed up, your hand gripping the strap of your rifle harder as you adjusted it on your shoulder. You could hear the judgment in his words as he said the word “Firefly”, but it was dampened by another emotion. Pity, maybe? Reservation, drawn from the sound of your anger?

“Yeah,” your reply was short, inviting no further discussion. Joel actually seemed to respect that as he backed off from the conversation.

You appreciated that.

When silence fell upon you again, it felt less antagonistic than before, but that tension between you and Joel didn’t ease. The crisp scent of snow in the air helped calm your emotions, and the flashes of memories receded from the forefront of your mind back to the dark crevices where they took up permanent residence. You let out a slow breath, watching it form a small cloud in the air as you relaxed minutely.

After more prolonged tension that begged you to look at the man walking by your side, you finally gave in. Your gaze was drawn back to Joel, and despite your best intentions, you began to realize that there was something else you could appreciate about the surly survivor.

Your eyes traced the lines of Joel's face, down the sharp angles of his side profile. You silently admired the slope of his aquiline nose, the salt and pepper dusted facial hair, and the strong jaw it covered. Since meeting him, you hadn’t really had the time to think about it, and you wouldn’t really admit it to yourself even if you had but, goddamn.

Joel Miller was fucking handsome.

Tommy was handsome too, of course, but you never found yourself attracted to him. There was no reason, no desire to cross the boundaries of friendship you had with him, even long before Maria was in the picture.

Joel, though?

Fuck, you didn’t know what it was, but all those unnamable sensations you had felt, that tension that hung heavy in the air, began to make sense the longer you looked at him. Maybe you just had a thing for older guys, you reasoned with yourself. A kink you hadn’t realized until now because Joel had unlocked it or something.

No, no that wouldn't do either. That was admitting there was something about Joel in particular that had awakened a part of you that should lay dormant, because you did not want to be attracted to your best friend's grizzled older brother, no matter how handsome he was.

Joel was just a really fucking hot old man, and that was all.

Whatever, you thought as you shook your head sharply. It wasn’t something you really wanted to analyze at this moment.

You probably just needed to get laid, an explanation you settled on quickly to reassure yourself that your attraction wasn't specific to the stoic man at your side. Jackson was such a small community, it was hard to have even one-night stands without somebody else knowing about it the next day, and for that reason you had gone months without fulfilling that kind of desire.

Yes, that was all it was. You just needed to fuck somebody, and Joel had nothing to do with it. He was just a handsome face at the wrong time.

“What?”

You blinked rapidly, the smooth baritone bringing you back to the present, eyes refocusing on Joel as you realized you had spaced out while staring directly at him.

And now he was staring back, waiting for an answer as to why you were staring in the first place.

Shit, you think to yourself as Joel arched an eyebrow in question, dark eyes inquisitive and fixed on you, like he was daring you to respond. 

Daring you to say exactly what you had been thinking.

Your stomach flipped as that feeling he had been evoking—desire, you now recognized it for what it was—began to stir inside of you again.

Shit balls fuck goddammit—

The sound of your name being called saved you, and you looked over to see Tommy waving the two of you over from outside the stables. Shit, you hadn't even noticed how close you were to your destination. How long had you been staring at Joel?

A fucking embarrassing stretch of time, apparently, you winced as a flush dusted your cheeks at the thought, a reaction you blamed on the cold, and you hoped Joel did too.

Letting out a quiet sigh of relief at Tommy being your savior yet again, your steps quickened towards him as you left Joel without an answer, since you didn’t have one yourself.

At least, not exactly one that you could admit out loud.

With your back turned, you missed the way Joel watched you walk away, eyes trailing down your figure briefly before they snapped back up, and he followed after you with a quiet grunt.

Potential attraction be damned, you had a job to do.

It was a blown fuse.

“So we all trudged out here for a fix that doesn’t take more than a few men?” a bitter voice rang out from the scaffolding that served as a lookout point above the gates to the dam.

“How about you keep your incredibly thought-provoking questions to yourself, Seth,” you snapped back, exchanging a glare with the older man from where you stood on the ground.

You rolled your eyes at his angry muttering, not needing to hear whatever he was saying to know it was probably offensive and definitely not worth your energy. A sigh pulled from your lips as you rotated the shoulder that didn’t have your rifle resting on it, glancing behind you to where Ellie was grumpily kicking at a pile of snow.

She had shown up at the stables with Maria, and after some brief arguing with Joel about her place in the party heading up to the dam, the teenager ended up getting her way. It was impressive that she had won the argument, judging from the glimpses of Joel’s own tenacity that you had witnessed so far. You knew now that Ellie could definitely face off with Dina if she could manage to wear down Joel.

Ellie had seemed to be in a sour mood on the ride up to the dam, her gaze alternating between Joel and Tommy. Although the brothers hadn't interacted on the trip—other than a sharp look Tommy gave at the shotgun you supplied Joel with, which you dismissed the question of with a shake of your head—you remembered how warmly the brothers had greeted each other, a stark contrast to how cold Joel’s attitude was towards Ellie from what little interactions you had seen. Maybe he wasn’t her father, then. Or maybe it was just a difficult relationship, you mused as you remembered your own father.

Still, there was a fondness hidden in the way Joel treated Ellie. It was obvious in how he had tried to get her to stay in Jackson, and how he had eventually given in and let her come along. He wasn’t completely frozen to her, but maybe it seemed that way from Ellie’s point of view. Your sympathy towards how she must be feeling is what urged you to speak to her now.

“Hey, Ellie,” you called out to her, gesturing for her to join you once you got her attention.

“What’s up?” Her voice wasn’t unkind as she walked over to you, but it also wasn’t as bright as when you had met her earlier that day. That made you feel a bit sad, to see her fiery personality doused under the weight of her emotions, and it's what inspired you to try and cheer her up.

“Do you wanna help me keep watch?” you asked with a nod towards the walkway at the top of the gate, patting the rifle at your side as her eyes lit up.

“Can I use your sniper rifle?”

You laughed at the blunt question, shrugging as you turned to walk towards one of the ladders that led up to the walkway. “You can look through the scope, sure.”

“Hey, hey!” Joel called out sharply from behind the two of you as Ellie began to scurry up the ladder, “I don’t think that’s such a good idea—”

“Oh, they’ll be fine,” you heard Tommy drawl, though one look back at Joel’s deep frown and hardened gaze showed how not fine he thought it would be.

Tommy went on to reassure Joel that you were not only perceptive and a great shot, but that he trusted you, while Joel still looked unconvinced. You could feel the heavy weight of his gaze on you at that mention of trust, a different kind of intensity simmering between you compared to the tension from before.

You couldn’t help but think that that kind of attention from Joel Miller was not a good thing as you pulled yourself from the top of the ladder onto the scaffolding. Trying to ignore it, you pulled up your rifle, looking through your scope to scan your surroundings around the dam. Nothing looked out of the ordinary, so you kneeled down next to Ellie as you held the gun out, showing her where to hold it while making sure her finger rested off the trigger.

“It’s really fucking heavy,” she grunted in annoyance as she struggled to hold it on her own, and you laughed as you held onto the stock to help keep it upright.

“Usually you can set it up on something to keep it steady, like a window pane or a fallen tree," you explained, surprised that she didn't seem to know how to hold a rifle. If Joel was so hellbent on survival, why hadn't he taught Ellie this? "You’ll be able to hold one when you’re older, though. Just gotta get those scrawny arms into shape.”

Ellie pulled back from where she was trying to look through the scope to fix you with an unamused look as she snapped, “I went to FEDRA school back in the QZ, I know how to use a gun.”

“So did I, and they didn’t teach me to aim for shit,” you shot back, watching as she blinked before matching your smile with a cheeky grin of her own, eyes lighting up from the new knowledge of the similar background you both shared.

“Where did you learn how to shoot?” she asked, one eye closing as she looked through the scope again.

“My dad,” you answered quietly, finding no reason to be dishonest with Ellie. She was curious, perhaps too much for her own good, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to crush that spirit by not being kind. 

You were her age once, and you remembered wishing you had somebody who would answer your questions. Even though you hadn't known Ellie for more than a few hours, you could sense that she may be a kindred spirit, similar in ways to how you had been when you were her age.

Before everything went even more to shit.

“And he wasn’t FEDRA?”

“No.” You shook your head, her question drawing you back to the present as you realized you had gone quiet, distracted by your own thoughts. “No, he was an army vet way before the Outbreak. But war kind of disillusioned him with the government.”

“So was he, like, a smuggler? Or something?” Ellie didn't pause in her line of questioning, even as she was focused on looking through the scope of your rifle at the snowy landscape. You had to admire her unshakable curiosity, and how determined she was to get the answers she wanted. Even if they did trudge up some memories you would rather remain buried in the subconscious of your mind.

“What, like Joel?” You laughed as you shook your head again, ignoring the surprised look she gave you when she realized you probably shouldn’t know that bit of information—it was one of the few facts about Joel you had learned from Tommy. “Nothing like that. He was—”

You paused, scratching at your cheek again, fingernails pricking at the small scar there. An old nervous habit. “He was part of a rebellion. A...freedom fighter, I guess.”

“Oh! Was he a Firefly? Like you?” The excitement was back in Ellie's voice again at the mention of freedom fighters, and you winced.

Shifting on the balls of your feet, you glanced away towards the nearby treeline that groaned under the weight of snow on their branches. “His rebellion wasn’t on that large of a scale. It was localized in the Seattle QZ, a fight against FEDRA for control of the city.”

Ellie paused, her glee fading as she pulled back from the scope. “I saw a fight like that in Kansas City,” she said quietly, eyes somber, and you realized then that she may have already faced more shit than even you did at her age. The unmovable force of her determination, her sharp wit and the scar that cut through one of her eyebrows spoke volumes of the hardships this poor kid may have already gone through. “It was…”

“It’s an ugly fight,” you said gently, and she nodded in agreement. “There’s no winner in a war like that.”

You hoped that Ellie knew you didn't pity her, but that you sympathized with whatever pain she's had to deal with already in her short life. You knew well how tragedy could rob somebody of the childhood they deserved, and you hoped that Ellie could have some semblance of happiness while she was still a kid; that she could hold onto her curiosity, good humor and childlike wonder for as long as she could.

Clearing your throat to try and shake the heavy atmosphere the topic had created, you looked across your surroundings again. You took a moment to appreciate the view the vantage point offered of the vast winter landscape. While Jackson could be overwhelming with its invasive holiday cheer, you enjoyed the snowy surroundings of the settlement this time of year. It reminded you of those parts of Seattle you had called home for a time.

After a moment of peaceful quiet, when that heavy topic loosened its claws on you, you looked down at Ellie with another smile.

“So, catch any movement?” you asked, not expecting any confirmation, but your smile froze as Ellie tensed up, her hands gripping the rifle tighter.

“Uh…” her voice was nervous as she pressed her eye closer against the scope and nodded, “yeah, actually.”

“What?” Your voice was sharp, causing Ellie to wince, and you would have felt bad if you weren’t too preoccupied with keeping the both of you safe, along with everybody else at the dam.

“Over there,” she lifted a free hand to point as you carefully took the rifle from her, “in the treeline.”

Your gaze followed the direction she was pointing in before lifting the scope to your own eye, finding a few men slowly slinking out from a break in the trees that was close to the gate—far too close.

“Tommy, we got company,” you called behind you, as a few more men walked out. Masked and armed.

And then more behind them.

Shit.

“Tommy—”

You were cut off by a shot ringing through the air and you ducked, automatically hunching over Ellie, protecting her body with your own as another shot rang out, and shouting rose up around you.

“Go for the ladder, get back to Tommy and Joel,” you urged Ellie as you gently pushed her towards the ladder.

“But—”

“Go, now! ” you ordered, leaving no room for argument as you watched her scamper down the ladder. You glanced back towards where Joel was with Tommy, seeing the older man was hurrying to where Ellie was descending as you looked back out through your scope at the approaching raiders.

Inhale, finger on the trigger, you track one raider’s movements, waiting for his head to pass between the crosshairs. Exhaling as he walked right into the center, your finger pressed down on the trigger, and—

“Shit!” You heard one of them yell over the loud bang that filled your ears. Grunting at the kick of the butt of the gun against your shoulder, you quickly ducked down, ejecting the cartridge as they continued to yell, “They got George!”

Focusing on steadying your breathing, you listened carefully to the sounds of the raiders shuffling forward as they traded fire with the Jackson guards positioned on top of the gates. When there was a break in the gunfire you popped up over the edge, eye against the scope, searching—

A shot whizzed past you—too far to have been a real danger, but still too close for your comfort.

You fired again, hastier this time, only hitting one in the shoulder but effectively sending them flying backwards. Chaos surrounded you as you slung your rifle back over your shoulder and descended the ladder. Your position up top was too open, you had to find another vantage point before—

Heavy thuds hit the gates as you landed on your feet. You ran forward to grab Ellie from where she was out in the open when you saw she hadn’t reached Joel yet, pulling her with you behind the cover of a pile of crates nearby.

The doors burst open as the two of you ducked, the sounds of an ensuing firefight now flooding your senses as you ejected the cartridge in your rifle again.

“Stay down,” you urged Ellie quietly as you weighed your options.

Your rifle wouldn’t do much good now in close combat, and you didn’t want to bring unnecessary attention to your position, not when you were suddenly responsible for keeping this kid alive.

Not wanting to be hampered by the weight of your rifle in case you needed to move fast, you carefully laid it on the ground and pulled your pistol out of its holster. You pivoted on the balls of your feet, listening closely in case any raiders came closer.

“You’re not going to go out there?” you heard Ellie hiss, and you looked back over your shoulder at her.

“Not when I’m trying to keep you alive, I’m not,” you whispered firmly, and she went quiet.

You winced as you heard somebody cry out and hit the ground near your hiding place, feeling a twinge of pain in your heart as you didn’t know if it was one of your men, or theirs. Grip tightening on your gun, you resisted the urge to look for a clear shot to help your comrades.

Distracted by our own sentiment, you didn't hear the raider creeping closer to you until a hand clamped down on Ellie’s arm and tugged her out of your hiding place. Spinning around, your eyes widened with fear as they pulled her back, their face covered by a bandana as they moved to point their gun at you.

That was their mistake.

If their gun had been pointed at Ellie, you would have been fucked. Pointed at you, though?

You could deal with those odds.

Whipping your gun up, your own shot rang through the air before they could even find their aim on you, their grip releasing from Ellie’s arm as their head sprayed with blood and they dropped dead to the ground.

You hastily pulled Ellie behind you, apologizing to her when she shouted from shock as you tried to take up as much space as you could in front of her, creating a shield for her with your own body.

Like fucking hell you were going to let an innocent kid die on your watch.

Your hands steadied as you pointed your gun at another raider, taking a moment to aim before squeezing the trigger and watching as they dropped before looking for another target.

Luckily, it seemed like the forces of the raiders were dwindling, the fight quickly turning in your favor, especially when you had both of the Miller brothers on your side.

Distracted as you were by your own struggle for survival, Joel and Tommy working together was a sight to behold. Despite having spent years apart, the two fell into step beside each other like no time had passed. A raider ran at Tommy, grabbing his rifle, and in the time it had taken you to aim at them, Tommy had turned and used his weight to shove the bandit to the ground in the same breath it took Joel to point the double barrel shotgun down and shoot them point blank.

After another moment of fighting that ended with the remainders of the bandits either lying dead on the ground or fleeing through the gates, you finally allowed yourself to let out a breath of relief.

Looking behind you, you shouted Ellie’s name at the same time Joel did as she ran towards the man. With the adrenaline fading and the guards of Jackson moving to take care of one another’s wounds, Ellie stopped in front of Joel as he looked over her in concern. Her words tripped over each other from the adrenaline that remained as she recounted her story of how you both had descended from the top of the gate, and how you had fought for her behind the crates. 

Ellie's voice was full of childlike wonder for adventure even as she told him how you shot the man who had grabbed her, and you laughed quietly to yourself at how strangely wholesome it was. Especially as Joel grabbed her shoulders to interrupt her, shaking her gently as he finally got a word in to ask if she was hurt.

“No!” Ellie cried, her excitement not fading even at the sight of his blatant worry, and your lips turned up in a soft smile. You hoped that she could see Joel's concern, and the warmth that had just broken through the chilly exterior he tried to keep up around her.

Shuffling pulled your attention from the wholesome moment and you turned, heart leaping into your throat as you watched a wounded raider that had been unaccounted for rise up from behind a couple of barrels. Fear kicked in, adrenaline coursing through your veins again as they lifted a knife and launched themselves towards Joel and Ellie.

You didn’t know who the raider was aiming for with their knife, but it didn’t matter as you ran towards them. Luckily they were wounded and you were faster, your own knife unsheathing and coming down in a swing into their neck before they could reach their target.

They gurgled, choking on their own blood as you twisted the metal, making sure they were dead before you pulled the knife out and let them fall at your feet.

Your chest rose and fell with heavy breaths from the surge of adrenaline, the blood of the raider you just killed splattered across your cheek as you looked up to find yourself face to face with a shocked Joel.

Joel, you realized somewhere in the back of your mind. They had been aiming for Joel.

There was a small sense of relief that it hadn’t been Ellie that could’ve been hurt. You hadn't wanted Joel to be harmed either, but given the choice, you would always save an innocent child.

You watched as surprise broke through his guarded gaze, combating with other emotions you couldn’t name that were obscured in the depths of his brown eyes.

“Joel!” Ellie shouted, making both you and Joel jump as you snapped back to the present. “Joel, she totally just fucking saved your life, man!”

The sound of her excitement was nearly drowned out by Maria’s rapid-paced orders for the guards to carefully sweep the premises to make sure no further surprises occurred. You sheathed your knife, looking from Ellie to Joel as she gestured at you and argued about something that you couldn’t hear through the sound of your blood rushing through your head.

Joel’s expression was closing off again, but he hadn’t looked away from you yet. Something indecipherable, something intense was in his gaze, only looking away when Tommy walked up and clamped a hand down onto his shoulder.

“What did I say?” Tommy said with no small amount of pride, a sound that made a smile flicker onto your face, the tension in your body beginning to ease as he grinned at you. “Told you that you could trust her.”

You watched as Tommy walked over to Maria, only looking away when he began to carefully check her for injuries, feeling that the act was too intimate, too personal to watch.

When you turned back, Joel's gaze was on you again, watching you closely. Adrenaline from the thwarted attack was fading as you reached a hand up to wipe the blood off your face, watching as something in Joel's eyes darkened at the action. You blinked, stomach flipping as your heart thumped in your chest, but the look was gone as soon as it came, leaving you stunned and wondering if you had imagined it.

What the fuck was—

“Joel!” Ellie hissed, delivering a not so gentle elbow to his ribs, judging from his wince.

He shot her a look of annoyance, some sort of silent understanding passing between them before he glanced back at you. Joel shifted slightly, almost looking...uncomfortable? That was certainly a new look on him, one you were taken aback by as his gaze darted away from you and back again.

“Thank you," he finally muttered gruffly, and your brows shot up as your eyes lit with surprise. That was...unexpected.

“Oh,” you leaned back, busying yourself with adjusting the strap of your knife around your thigh as you found it hard to respond to the unexpected sincerity he displayed—even if it had been drawn begrudgingly from him by Ellie. “Uh, you’re welcome.”

Looking back up at him, you nodded with a small smile, the first real smile you had given him since you had met. When Joel’s gaze darted back to you at your words, he saw that smile lighting up your face, and he paused.

There it was again, that growing tension that threatened to smother the both of you. You resisted the urge to shift from underneath it as it pressed down on you, your gaze locked with Joel's. Neither of you wanted to acknowledge it, but neither wanted to be the first to back down either.

Down by his side, Ellie’s gaze was flickering quickly between the two of you, a troublemaking grin slowly growing on her face.

“And now, you ask her to get a drink sometime.”

“Now I—” Joel stopped himself from automatically repeating whatever Ellie had said, his head jerking to the side as he glared down at her with a hard, unamused look. “What? ”

“Damn, Joel,” Ellie snickered as her shit-eating grin seemed to grow impossibly larger at his visible irritation, “got no game in your old age?”

Despite your better judgment, you laughed, harder and brighter than you had in what felt like a long time. Too long, you remarked internally as Ellie’s own laughter joined yours, the two of you slowly cracking up as Joel stared between you both in disbelief.

“Fucking hell,” he muttered to himself as he started to pace away from the both of you as you still cackled amongst yourselves. “Stop laughing, there are dead people. Goddamn ridiculous...”

But neither of you stopped. If anything, you only laughed harder at the sight of Joel’s exasperation. 

“Are you—what are you, his wingman?” you asked between giggles, making Ellie snort as she punched your arm.

“Stop! Stop, I’m gonna pee my pants,” she cackled as she doubled over in laughter, and you wiped at a stray tear forming in your eye.

Joel was right—it was probably wildly inappropriate, being in stitches over dumb jokes while surrounded by the bodies of the raiders you and your fellow guards had just shot down. But the release of adrenaline made people do stupid things.

And somewhere away from the two of you, out of sight from prying eyes, the corner of Joel’s lips twitched as he fought off a tiny smile of utter disbelief at yours and Ellie’s combined stupidity.

[lulublack90]

Prompt 27 - Blind Date

@wolfstarmicrofic May 27, word count 984

Sirius had agreed to go on a new TV show designed for you to basically pick a blind date. It was hosted by a blonde that he couldn’t quite remember her name. Nita, Tina? 

He was behind the scenes being prepped by a producer or something. 

He was placed behind the stage, ready to go on when he was called. With him was the presenter. He still couldn’t remember her name. She completely ignored him and barked orders at her poor PA. 

“Ready when you are Ms. Skeeter.” A woman with a headset and microphone said.

“Good, let’s get this over with.” She said with a total lack of enthusiasm. 

“Ladies and Gentlemen, it’s Blind Date, and here is your host, Ms Rita Skeeter!” The announcer told the audience. Rita burst through from the side of the stage, waving and blowing kisses at her cheering audience. 

“Hello and welcome to Blind Date.” Rita smiled, opening her arms wide. “We have three lovely young men all hoping to go on a blind date tonight and here they are!” She swept her arms to the side and that was the last Sirius saw, as he was promptly spun around so he couldn’t see the stage. 

“He shouldn’t have been left here!” Someone shouted. “He can’t see the contestants, that's the whole point of the show.”

He was rushed to another part of the backstage while Rita introduced the three men he was going to choose between. 

“Right you’re on,” He was suddenly pushed out a little door and onto the main stage. 

There was a single chair in the middle of the stage and a large partition, blocking his view of the others. 

“Hello, Sirius!” Rita gushed. “Sirius is from London and from what I’ve seen, all of our contestants will want to take him home.” Sirius sat in the chair, holding the cards with his pre-written questions. “Right, Sirius, you have your questions, so let’s get started!” The crowd clapped as Sirius cleared his throat.

“I’m a boy who likes a good time. I don’t like to be bored. If you could keep me entertained, what would we do? Er, contestant number 1.” He spoke clearly. 

“What an excellent question, Sirius, but let’s make sure to keep our answers clean gentlemen.” Rita spoke a bit louder over the partition. The crowd ate her words up.

“Well, I’d take you to my favourite spa and treat you to a bit of pampering and then, after that, I have a box at the theatre.” Contestant number 1 answered. Sirius pulled a face, he was bored already. 

“Er, thanks number 1. Number 2, same question.” He hoped it was better than the last. 

“I’d take you to the races and then out for an elegant dinner at the savoy before we head back to mine for drinks looking out over the Thames.” Was the answer number 2 gave. Sirius rolled his eyes, fat chance of that happening. He felt like giving up already. 

“Sounds like fun,” He tried to smile. “Number 3 your turn.” 

Number three took a second to answer. 

“I’d take you on a tour of London,” Oh lord, Sirius thought, all duds. “But the secret London. I know where the hidden passageways are and the gorier stories to tell. I’d probably end up at my favourite bookshop, which has a fireplace and café where we could curl up with a good book before we go out in the dark to search for the hundreds of ghosts that are meant to haunt London.” Sirius was literally on the edge of his seat. He didn’t need to hear anymore. He'd already decided who he wanted. 

“Oooo, such different answers,” Rita cooed. “Next question, Sirius,”

“Dogs or cats? For all three again.”

“Cat,”

“Neither,” That one got a boo.

“Dogs,” Sirius smiled. He shuffled to his last card. 

“How do you feel about motorbikes?” He had his fingers crossed. 

“Love, love, love, them,”

“Sorry, no. They don't agree with my hair.”

“Hate, not a chance you’ll get me on one.” Well, 2 out of 3 at least. 

“Alright Sirius, you’ve asked your questions, do you know who you’re going to pick?” Rita asked, trying to look serious. He nodded. 

“Yes, contestant number 3.” Cheers erupted from the crowd.

“Let’s see who you didn’t pick. Come on over number 1.” A tall dark-skinned handsome gentleman walked around the partition. “Kingsley, such a shame,” Rita shook her head. Sirius shook Kingsley's hand, and he walked off the stage. “Number 2,” Rita called. A blonde man, who’d clearly spent too much time on his appearance. “Poor, poor, Gilderoy. Don’t worry sweetheart, you’ll find someone,” Gilderoy waved at the crowd and blew them kisses, forgetting to shake Sirius’s hand before he left. “And finally, the moment we’ve been waiting for. Sirius’s pick. Let me introduce Remus!” Rita cheered.

Remus walked around and Sirius felt his heart skip a beat. Remus looked shyly at him and rewarded him with a smile. Sirius forgot he was on a TV show and took Remus’s hand before trying to lead him off the stage. “Wait!” Rita called," we have to give you your getaway prize.” 

Reluctantly, Sirius led Remus back across the stage and waited for Rita to continue. “Well, Sirius and Remus, we are sending you on a weekend trip to the lake district. What do you think of that?”

“It sounds wonderful Rita, thank you very much. Now, if you don’t mind, this one’s got a tour to start.” That time he ignored everyone and he and Remus made their escape. 

“Hi,” He said once they were outside. 

“Hi,” Remus said back. Sirius knew just from sight that he and Remus would work out. So, being a bit cheeky, he pushed Remus up against the side of the recording studio and leaned in for a kiss. Remus closed the gap and that was that. 

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.173 The whole truth

I had every intention of waking up early to get a jump on cleaning up the mess, but my bed had me in a chokehold. The room was the perfect temperature thanks to the cooler autumn air and my skimpy attire. I eventually pried myself away from the soft, cool sheets, but the thought of washing piles of soiled dishes made me regret ever leaving my crisp sanctuary. Still, I dragged myself downstairs, fully prepared to insist we call a cleaning service only to find Sophia collecting the last of the plates. That woman is a goddess, and the Watcher must really love me. I appreciated her pro-activeness, but felt bad about her doing all of that alone when we were supposed to tackle it together. Even though I knew there wasn't anything else to do, I still looked around to find a way to help and found piles of dog hair everywhere—even outside. I used to stay on top of brushing Rosie when she and Kooper were our only babies, but now I barely know what day it is half of the time. She's lucky if I'm able to go jogging with her.

With nothing else to do, I jumped on breakfast while Sophia checked on Desiree, who was still asleep. It's been a while since I had a nice, quiet, mess-free meal with my wife. Well, at least it began quietly. My phone would not stop ringing. First, Less called with a wild story about bath time adventures with our terrific trio. Spoiler alert: they were not so terrific, heh.

Next, Maira called to explain why she missed Desi's birthday party. I was so overjoyed to learn she had gone on a date, and it went well! She's finally ready to let love into her life, and I couldn't be more happy for her. I never understood why she was so hesitant, apart from not wanting to be pressured by society's expectations. She has her issues just like everyone else, but she is so sweet and deserves to have all the love she's given come back to her tenfold. I tell her I can't wait to meet him--when the time is right, of course.

Sophia, overhearing my side of the conversation, expressed happiness for the news and hit me with an unexpected question when I hung up.

"What's the story with you two?"

"Story? I thought I told you."

"You did. But you clearly love her. I know you said you were always just friends, but something happened. I think I'm ready to know what that is now."

This is such a healthy conversation between two very mature adults. Even though Sophia has always been very confident about our relationship, we couldn't have had this conversation any earlier than now. We've lived through some things. She's seen me with my friends and understands the love I have for Maira is a different kind of love that is not a threat.

"Okay..."

I sit back in my chair, thinking of what she really wants to know and how to tell this story because it's one of my least fond memories.

"I almost lost her."

Sophia gasped, and I knew this story was not what she had expected.

"The first time I went to her place, she was going to make dinner. Heh, she wasn't much of a cook, but she wanted to try. I don't know how it happened, but the stove... It just...blew up. She was on fire, and I..."

It still pained me to remember how I ran out of there like a coward, leaving her to fend for herself. I think that's just one of those things in life I'll never get over and will beat myself up about it until I'm dead.

"I ran, Sophia. She was completely engulfed in flames, and I left her."

"I'm glad you did," she said. "Fires are so tricky! Both of you could have been hurt, or worse."

"I know. It doesn't make me feel less like a punk, though. Her building has a good alarm system, so the fire department came quickly and saved her, thank Watcher. She was okay, obviously. But I wasn't. I didn't realize how special to me she was until then. It wasn't like I wanted to run off and marry her or anything, but she was someone I wanted to keep. I held her so tight. Her hair and clothes were singed, and she really needed to shower and change, but I couldn't let her go. I refuse to let her go."

"Wow, Luca! I'm so sorry you had to witness such a horrible accident. I see how things are different with her, especially when you feel partly responsible!"

"Yeah. I'm glad you understand."

"I think I was afraid before, but I'm ready to know all your little secrets now."

I'm really glad she asked me about this. Not because I felt burdened and needed to share, but because it brought back the kind of intimacy we shared back when we started dating. It's been so long since we've experienced it, I forgot it was even there. Between the wedding stuff, pregnancy stuff, parenthood stuff, and death, I feel like we've just been surviving for the longest, and I'm really looking forward to get back to living...whenever that is.

Just as that thought entered my mind, yet another phone call came in. It was Dub with a very enticing invitation. He and Maia got engaged last night, and they're eloping! His request that was high key a demand was to join them in Ciudad Enamorada to witness their nuptials. They rented a huge house with enough room for us if we want to stay with them. The only caveat was we'll have to leave as soon as possible because it's going down later today! I gave him a tentative yes because there is no way my best friend is getting married and I'm not there. And to turn down a free vacation? I think not. I told him I'd confirm in a few minutes after I discuss with Sophia who waited anxiously for me to explain the exciting, one-sided conversation she overheard. I honestly thought she would hesitate to make such a big trip in a short amount of time, but to my surprise, she said yes immediately. After all, this is the same woman who asked me to move in with her after our first date, heh. We're going to the City of Love, baby!

[sugdenlovesdingle]

Seven Several scentence Sunday

thanks for the tags @carlos-in-glasses @bonheur-cafe @chicgeekgirl89 @nancys-braids

We're back in action baby! I'm so happy my silly little comfort show is back! As usual I'm working on about 12 different things at the same time so it's hard to decide what to share, but have some

K9 handler Carlos

"Hi... uhm I'm looking for someone named Firefox? She's supposed to work here but didn't tell me her actual name..." Carlos trailed off, hoping he didn't look as awkward as he felt.

"Oh hi, that's me!" a woman yelled as she ran down the stairs before either of the paramedics he'd asked could reply. "I'm so sorry I forgot to tell you my name!" she ran up to him with an outstretched hand. "I'm Marjan."

"Carlos." he shook her hand.

"And this must be Pumpkin!" she dropped to her knees and started petting and playing with the dog who loved the attention.

"Marj, you can't just pet police dogs when they're working. And you shouldn't put your face so close to a strange dog's teeth." the male paramedic with the beautiful green eyes warned her.

"It's fine..." Carlos managed to say, trying his best not to stare too much. "She's used to being manhandled by my nieces and nephews. And we're done for the day anyway."

"Oh that's great! We can brainstorm about our collab video!" Marjan said, reluctantly getting up from the floor. "Buttercup is probably napping in the bunkroom, I'll go get him so they can meet and be friends."

"Wait... what did you have in mind for the video? Some red vs blue challenge? I know it's a big thing in this city with the baseball competition and everything, but I'm not interested in any of that. I'd rather not piss off the fire department... in case I ever need them." Carlos said, checking for a reaction from the paramedic with the beautiful eyes. "And Pumpkin isn't trained for any fire related work."

"Neither is Buttercup." the man said with a smirk.

"What?" Carlos looked back and forth between him and Marjan.

"Buttercup is a pet. A lazy, big, fluffy Bernese Mountain Dog who lives for snacks and napping on my bed, and refusing to move when I want to get in it." the man explained.

"Don't listen to him." Marjan physically put herself between the beautiful man and Carlos, and he wished she'd move. "We can see how well Buttercup does with police work! Or maybe a snack challenge."

"I know which one Buttercup would prefer." the beautiful man commented. "He'd never stop eating if it was up to him."

"Pumpkin is the same. I have to watch what she eats or she won't fit her harness anymore. Especially when I'm at my parents' house when my sisters are there too. Between my mother and my niece, Pumpkin gets enough snacks to last her a whole week."

The beautiful man smiled and somehow became even more beautiful.

"That's cute." he said and turned to Marjan. "And it sounds like someone else I know."

------

I never know who to tag in these things so

Open tag +

@lemonlyman-dotcom @pimento-playing-hopscotch @welcometololaland @captain-gillian @literateowl

[wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee28374728]

Until Dawn character hcs

Sam:

Her music taste is crazy. Like the same playlist could have Beethoven, Iron Maiden, The BeeGees and Taylor Swift

Does aerobics in her pajamas

Doesn't know how to order at Starbucks (she just wanted a medium)

Had a dog walking business in high school

Knows how to surf

Will absolutely destroy you in most strategy based board games

Favorite holiday is Halloween

Chris:

Dog person AND cat dad

Far sighted

Huge history nerd, had a ww2 phase in high school that never completely went away

Guy at a camping trip who tells the ghost story that leads up to a joke

Knows exactly what to do when a woman is on her period

Nervous fidgets; bouncing leg, tapping on desk/table, etc

Knew where everything was in his school backpack at all times

Ashley:

Say it with me people: Only. Fucking. Child.

Will get mad at you for saying pumpkin spice latte is basic

Was a horse girl in middle school

Owns more scented candles than a bath and body works

Has gotten her fortune told at a carnival and taken it pretty seriously

Had braces

Smokes weed

Mike:

Track and field

Can't find the clit

Paid other people to do his homework

Wanted to be a firefighter when he was 6

Shockingly scared of bugs, used to make Emily kill them for him, but Jess won't do it

Can swim but doesn't like it

Was really close with Sam when they were younger, Sam is the one who introduced him to the group.

Jessica:

Used to be much happier and more chill before puberty, after which she felt pressure to live up to her looks

Her and Emily used to be super close and she misses it

Was a Frozen kid and still watches it a lot

Most definitely bi curious at least(Emily to blame)

Reads her horoscope but doesn't actually take it seriously

Emily:

Wayyyy to much Disney Channel in her early childhood, now loves drama

The middle of many siblings, acts the way she does for more attention

Was vegetarian at some point

Secretly misses being close with Jess, but makes sure no one knows

Needs rain sounds to sleep

Really wants Matt to stand up to her, this is why she's so hard on him

Matt:

Easily confused when women aren't completely direct

Probably smoked weed at least once, but quit doing it when he started doing sports

Nervous around babies(so small what if he panicked and dropped them)

Had an earring in one ear at one point, but his parents had him take it out and now the piercing is healed over

Can't tell the difference between nail polish shades

Josh:

Would fight god in the Denny's parking lot for someone if they gave him a hug

His bedroom/college dorm is covered in so many movie and band posters you can't see the wall anymore

Talks to cats like they're people

Confused rich(wait his is the only family with six cars??)

Jokes about sex and women, but if he saw a girl being taken advantage of he's gonna slap a frat bro

Owns a VHS tape player

Friggin s l e e p s in checkered shirts

Hannah:

Plant mom

Inspirational quotes on the wall

Best party is a book and a blanket

Nature documentaries

Josh's partner in crime

Loved dolls as a little kid, not Barbies, like baby dolls and porcelain dolls

Fairy lights in her bedroom

Loves music, Josh started buying her cassette tapes and now she collects them

Beth

Can you say LESBIAN?

Is never seen without her hat

Tried to stop Josh and Hannah from causing trouble, it never worked

Uggs and leggings

Smokes weed with Ashley

Her side of her and Hannah's bedroom is so much neater and cleaner

Total metalhead but no one knows bcs "she doesn't look it"

Dr. Hill:

Accidentally opened YouTube once while trying to find the news app

Can't work if the music has lyrics, it's too distracting

Might have a husband

Has such doctor handwriting that he can't hardly read it himself

Coffee addict

911 on speed dial(he's worried about all his patients)

The real Dr Hill is really nice, only the hallucination version is all threatening

Flamethrower guy:

Fucking loves soup

Hasn't bought clothes in years, and got them all secondhand

Has been off the mountain exactly twice

"When did kids get this dumb?"

Secretly stays in the lodge sometimes when no one is there bcs it's shelter and it's kinda fancy

Actually feels crazy guilty for not saving the twins

Was very happy to see Mike making friends with his wolves

[deanoheartspie]

Sunshine 5

Pairing: Cowboy Sheriff Dean x City Gal Reader

Summary: After your family cut you off, your great-aunt Laura invited you over to her ranch you often visited when you were just a child... You drive through the beautiful town until you accidentally graze a horse that just so happens to be the sheriffs...

Warnings: None

A/N: I've gotten some feedback on my writing! So this is my first attempt at trying to make it better and make it make sense for all! I really do appreciate suggestions with writing/about the book, also love hearing what you have to say about the characters.

(MIGHT REWRITE!! Depending on how I feel about it)

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Y/N POV

The beautiful grassy fields, full of bright colorful flowers, and the clouds in the most beautiful blue sky ever seen. It was like it was picture-perfect almost too good to be true. Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't you'd never know for sure.

Most of all though... Dean. He was a good man, you could tell by just the way he carried himself or the way he cared about others.

You've never laughed as hard or had genuine conversations as you had this afternoon with no other than the gruff cowboy. Family members never really cared or even tried to seem interested in what you had to say but when they did they were only interested in how it'd affect their precious images.

After he left though, grumbling about having to chase some dog again earning a laugh from you and a simple 'good luck' he ran off after walking me back. True gentleman I must say.

“Hey, Laura do you need help with anything?” You tiredly ask desperately wanting to drown yourself in a nice hot shower.

The older woman looks up from her knitting and smiles as she shakes her head “No thank you sweetheart, how did today go? Did he go easy on ya?” She asked as she went back to what she was doing glancing up at you a few times.

Easy? Maybe he did? He didn't seem as bossy as he usually was had they talked to him?

“You could say that... He did teach me a lot. I appreciate you guys letting me stay here” You thank them probably for the one-hundredth time this week.

“That's good. He's very good at what he does, and quit thankin' us we are family and family helps one another. Now shoo! Go relax, you are probably exhausted its getting way too hot out there”

You smile and nod, giving her a quick hug before running up to the room.

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

Drying off your hair, tossing a tank top, and your favorite soft pajama pants that most definitely would get ruined here if something were to happen.

The creaking wood floors, announce you to everyone downstairs causing Dean and a little girl to look at you... Smiling at them you wave.

“Who's this little one?” You ask but can see the resemblance between the two, was this who Lina Linda Lisa was? Whatever her name was talking about that day on the sidewalk?

“My daughter” His usual gruff and annoyed voice was non-existent. He sounded happier.

The big ole green-eyed little girl had the biggest smile on her face as she leaned back and forth on her plastic princess heels. She was practically a carbon copy of Dean, but as a young girl and boy was she adorable.

“Hello! I'm Rory” She stuck her tiny hand out, You gently shook her hand the same smile stuck on your face.

“Nice to meet you, Rory! I'm Y/n”

Rory quietly thought for a moment, it felt like a mini interview, and god that made you anxious.

“Do you like ponies?” she asked squinting her eyes, acting as if she was asking the most important question ever.

Dean rolled his eyes and shook his head while he had a small smile of amusement wondering how this would go.

“Hm, are they magical ponies or normal ones?”

She tapped her chin, before reaching up to her father who knew the look she gave him probably way too well because right away he handed her a unicorn stuffed animal. “Obviously the ones that can fly!” Aurora said in a duh tone, pointing up at you, you look around curious as to what/why she was exactly pointing for.

“Aurora what did I say about pointing? It's rude.” Dean's voice echoed from the hallway, he was on his way into the kitchen.

“I like her, you date her?” She said, causing Dean to spit out his coffee and start coughing his lungs out. Your eyes widen in surprise, who would've thought a simple question about magical freakin' horses would lead to this?

“You can't keep doin' that, sweet pea. She's my friend, and that's all.” He explained, cleaning up his mess while the little girl nodded before shrugging.

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

The rest of the night went well, You and Rory played for a bit while Dean cooked. Giving him credit where it's due, he's a pretty damn good cook if you must say yourself. Though half the things he does make will mostly take 30 years off your life. That donut burger was worth it though...

Bedtime came around, and Aurora fell asleep in your arms safe and sound. Following Dean up to his room after he offered plenty of times to take Rory off of your shoulders after you refused not wanting to wake the young lady.

What you hadn't noticed before when you had woken the man up this morning was the little princess bed on the other end of the bedroom full of toys and stuffed animals.

“Sorry,” He whispered pushing everything off to the side neatly, grabbing a big t-shirt and gently putting it on Rory, before taking her from your arms and tucking her in.

Oddly enough this felt normal. Though it probably shouldn't have. Friends, friends are what we are and that's it.

“Good night Dean.” You say halfway out the bedroom door when he says something that caught you off guard.

“Will you have a drink with me?” He asked standing up straight and walking towards you with a tiny smile.

A drink with Dean? That actually sounds kinda nice.

“Sure. Though I'm surprised you still haven't learned your lesson from last night's drunken mess” You tease, flashing off your pearly whites as he rolls his eyes guiding you downstairs out to the front porch.

He hands me a nice cold beer before plopping himself down onto the front porch stairs, looking up at the starry night sky. Even at night, this place was beautiful.

“So, you never told me why you're here in the first place Darlin',” He said breaking the silence, putting his full attention onto you.

“Runaway bride.” You say shortly, with a tiny shrug before taking a sip of the liquid. Dean's were wide before he broke into a fit of laughter, shaking his head

“No really why are you here?” He asked again calming himself down, the smile still on his face and his face all red from the laughing.

“Runaway bride.” You say slower this time, in all seriousness. The smile was quick to leave his face and his eyes looked like they were about to pop out of his face.

“Your fuckin' with me right? That stuff only happens on telenovelas” Dean was leaning his head back against the railing, still in shock.

“Nope.”

“Y/n why do you sound so calm about this? What'd he do to have you run off to the middle of nowhere and pick up horse shit for the rest of your life” Dean asked, running his fingers through his hair before finishing off his beer.

“It was set up, arranged marriage. Didn't want to go through with it so I left plain and simple.” You get up stretching your arms grabbing the small blanket from the swinging couch, wrapping it around yourself.

“You shock me every day. I won't have some crazy man comin' here demanding you right? I ain't gonna get in a fight for you sweetheart pretty and all but I have a kid and I'm already on thin ice.” He seriously says while never once looking away from you.

“I don't expect you to get in a fight for me and no, there should be no man coming here to fight you” You roll your eyes, men were stupid sad thing was you did want someone to love, and protect you. But then again that only happened in fairytales, this was fair from one.

“Glad we are on the same page. But as the sheriff, I'd have to help ya out so just gimmie a call”

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

----Tag list----

@deans-spinster-witch @leigh70 @mrsjenniferwinchester @ladysparkles78 @hobby27 @khaleesihavilliard @foxyjwls007 @lucidlivi @jc-winchester @globetrotter28 @beskarfilms @the141bandicoot @alysinwonderland-at-tea @randomgurl2326 @ambergoddess444 @westernwinchesters @lemmons1998 @julie040904 @nic-kolas @raisinggray @alternativeprincess